The Love Affair of Nagato Yuki
by rick777
Summary: Nagato Yuki experiences horrible nightmares which nearly crash her system. She asks Kyon for help. Will love flourish between them? Also featured: Haruhi gets snail mail from John Smith... from the future! How much of the truth will be revealed to her?
1. The wishes and fears of Nagato Yuki

The Love Affair of Nagato Yuki.

by Rick

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Suzumiya Haruhi novels, TV series, characters, etc. This work is purely fan-made.

Note: This chapter was last edited on April 20, 2009. Many more details were added to the story.

**Chapter 1. ****The wishes and fears of Nagato Yuki.**

It was a Friday. For a normal student, Friday would mean freedom from school activities. But I am not a normal student. Why? Because the sad fate brought me to the attention of Suzumiya Haruhi.

Today our brigade commander honored her status and commanded us to search for mysteries in the city... using random searches.

Having read detective novels, science fiction and mystery when I was younger, I knew that the most rational way to search for mysteries would be by making a city-wide census, writing publicity - and with the advent of social networking sites on the internet, we could dedicate a whole forum to discuss any weird and mysterious events.

To my dismay, Suzumiya Haruhi is anything but rational, and her source for inspiration is more random than the high frequency electromagnetic noise coming from the most remote corners of outer space. Let me put it this way: If a modern art critic had to compare a painting made by Suzumiya Haruhi, against one made by an untrained monkey, the art critic would praise the monkey.

Today's mystery search would end around 6PM. As usual, Haruhi let luck decide the outcome of how the teams would be formed. But I have learned from experience, that whenever Suzumiya Haruhi is involved, there is no such thing as luck. Or, as Einstein would say, "God does not play dice". If there's one person in the world to whom this phrase applies, it is indeed Suzumiya Haruhi.

So, the "divine will" of Haruhi got me to team up with Nagato Yuki. I thanked my "luck", as lately I've been more interested in Nagato as a person rather than an Integrated Data humanoid interface. Perhaps it was fate that bestowed me with the powers to distinguish Nagato's emotions by analyzing with critical eye the tiniest of changes in her facial expressions. Perhaps it was just that she got subconsciously connected to me, so that I would know whenever she was angry, sad, or happy.

But I still wished... I still wished that one day she could smile.

As I was saying, Haruhi got the idea of randomly determining the start locations for every team.

"Because It's more fun this way!"

So she purchased a city map (actually she made ME purchase it), closed her eyes and let her finger take the decision for her. What is this, the Ouija board?

Not being able to break free from my fate, I accepted having to walk the greatest distance from the meeting point with Nagato. But I thanked for that, as it would give me more time to talk with her. Nagato was a mystery. Not because she was an alien humanoid, but because I had the feeling that she trusted me to share her thoughts, as if there was a sea of emotions inside that opaque (but cute) shell, but only allowed me to see glimpses of it. Oh, Nagato, how much I want you to be happy and smile.

My first thought was to invite her an ice cream. Yes, you could say this was a date. As we approached our destination, I asked Nagato if she knew of any places Haruhi would find "interesting".

"There is an antique book library five blocks away."

Food is not allowed in libraries, so there goes the idea of inviting Nagato an ice cream.

Before reaching the library, we saw a wedding dresses store. I would have never thought that Nagato would stop by the store and stare at the groom suit and the bride dress.

"Nagato, what are you looking at?"

But she didn't answer. Nagato, this is weird of you. Wait, perhaps you noticed something dangerous?

"No, no danger detected."

Before Nagato would turn around and continue the search for mysteries, our presence attracted the attention of a greedy salesman, but I repeat myself.

"Oh, are you two fellas planning to get married?" he said, anxiously rubbing his hands.

"Eh? Oh no, sorry, we were going to the library next block. Perhaps the dress attracted the curiosity of my friend here, it's very pretty!"

"Ah, yes!" said the salesman, showing a smile comparable to Koizumi's. "But it wouldn't match the beauty of her. Is she your girlfriend?"

What? Nagato? My girlfriend?

"Oh, no, sorry. We're just schoolmates."

"So the girl's not your girlfriend? Oh, what a pity, you make a nice couple."

"Let's go, Nagato. If Haruhi finds us here, who knows what might happen to the world as we know it."

"Sorry."

Why would Nagato stop without reason in there? Had I been more analytic, I would have realized the truth. But I was too hard headed at the time. And little I knew, that this seemingly random event would trigger a series of stronger events which would end up changing the shape of world. Or at least, my world. Was this what Chaos Theory calls "The Butterfly Effect"? Or maybe it was something else?

We arrived to the library, and Nagato began searching for mysterious books.

After a while of searching, realizing I wouldn't find anything good, I decided to get out.

"Found anything mysterious?"

Nagato, while staring at me with her obsidian eyes, raised a book she had been reading.

"Very mysterious", she told me. The cover said: "Mysteries of the Human Mind. A treatise on modern psychology".

I sighed. I doubt that was the kind of mysteries that Haruhi wanted.

"Well, let's call it a day. We still have 15 minutes until the return time".

Nagato did not respond. But that book made me wonder. Is the human mind a mystery for you, Nagato? That reminded me of something I wanted to ask her for a long time.

"Nagato..."

"Yes?"

Still walking, she tilted her head and looked at me, with an inquisitive look. Not showing the slightest expression, her eyes just told me that she was interested in what I had to say. I got a bit nervous. But why would I get nervous? Nevermind, Kyon, just say what you got in that head of yours.

"Nagato, I wanted to ask you this for a while, but I never got the chance. I've been thinking of that December 18th."

"..."

"I would like to know more about it. Have you experienced any stress or any problems with... how did you call it? Erroneous data?"

Nagato tilted her head to look at the sidewalk again.

"Noise or Corrupted data appearing in my system. The noise quantity has decreased significantly since the restriction was held in place. Still, some days there are peaks in noise quantity, and I can't determine the reason."

Now it's the time.

"Have you considered that this 'corrupted data' could be related to your own emotions?"

She looked at me again, and stared for around three seconds without saying a word. Then, she asked:

"Why do you think so?"

"Why not?" I asked.

"There is no logical reason to assume so." she said, looking at the road again.

"But then again, nothing is logical in Haruhi. And there are many illogical things in the human mind, don't you think? Perhaps the human mind contains data that can't be interpreted with logic."

"In the past I have analysed several brainwave patterns in human beings, and the correlation to the noise in my system is negligible."

"Well, that may be because you're not fully human. Who knows if emotions manifest themselves differently between ordinary humans and human interfaces like you? Who knows if Haruhi altered your interface, or even your mind, so that you could have all kinds of human emotions, and you haven't even realized?"

Nagato stopped, and looked at me.

"..."

After pausing for around 5 seconds, she spoke again.

"I had not considered that possibility."

"Nagato, can I ask you another question?"

"Yes?"

Why is it that suddenly, when Nagato looks at me, sometimes I feel weird? I began thinking about the Nagato Yuki that I met in the alternate world that she had built for me. But I wonder if it would be too painful for her if I asked her about showing emotions. After all, I don't want to make her feel less of a person just because she can't express her emotions. I better take the safer route.

"Have you considered... reading works that talk about human emotions? Romantic novels, psychology works, I don't know."

"Yes, I have. In fact, now that you mentioned this possibility, I am very curious."

We didn't have any more time for chit-chat, because my cellphone began ringing again. Knowing who it was, I feared both answering and NOT answering. When I clicked on the 'answer' button, the cellphone yelled at me so hard that made the people around look at me with a curious and surprised gaze.

"Kyon, where are you? You're late!"

"What do you mean I'm late! We still have ten minutes left!"

"Everyone's at the meeting point! You have ONE minute to arrive!"

I hung up the phone.

"Time to run again", I told Nagato.

Having exhausted all of my physical energy to avoid punishment, I managed to get to the meeting point, panting and gasping for air.

"Kyon, you should make more exercise! How can you be so tired when Yuki barely sweated? And as usual, you're late, where were you?"

Having recovered some of my breath, I could finally speak.

"We were investigating mysterious books in an antique library. Satisfied?"

"Did you find anything interesting?"

"The only mysterious book we could find was one entitled 'Mysteries of the Human mind', but all it was about was psychology. Right Nagato?"

Nagato nodded without saying a word.

"Oh, well." said Haruhi, disappointed. "End of activities for today. DISMISSED!"

We all returned home.

The next two weeks were more normal than usual. In fact, they were abnormally normal. And with 'abnormally normal', I mean boring, in Haruhi's terms. Haruhi had been busy helping a neighbor with his school duties. This was no common boy, but as I had learned earlier, this would be the same genius that would discover the science behind time travel. I wondered if it was Haruhi helping him, or if it was him teaching Haruhi. Nevermind.

I was able to rest for at least 5 days without Haruhi bothering us to do something exciting and mysterious. And helping people would put her in a good mood, so we didn't need to worry about closed spaces either.

During that week, I found Nagato playing dating sims on her laptop. She was wearing a pair of white rabbit-shaped headphones. Watching the little pokerface wearing those mega-kawaii headphones would make any man the psychological need to hug that girl. She just looked too cute.

I wondered where she got the idea to buy those headphones.

"Hey, Nagato. What are you doing?"

"Researching."

"About?"

"Teenager Romance."

"Hmmm... that's interesting. Is this the first time you play?"

"I have seen gameplays and fan videos online, so I got curious."

"Ah, I see. What side are you playing, male, or female?"

"Male. This game doesn't allow you to play as a female. But it also helps me to have a better understanding of male adolescent humans, specifically, their libido."

"I see. And the headphones?"

She looked at me with her poker face, and showed me a box of a dating-sim game that included the headphones for free.

"It was a gift from the Computer Research Society."

"Ah, now I understand. Well, good luck, and try getting the happy ending!"

She stared at me for a few seconds, and answered.

"I will."

The next week, it was a tuesday, I remember well, I was doing my homework when the phone rang. It was around 6PM. I remember because the sun was setting.

My little sister answered the phone.

"Hello? Who is this? Hmm... weird."

I continued with the homework, when the phone rang again. And my little sister answered again. "Hello? Hello?"

"Brother... I think someone's playing a prank on us!"

"I'm doing my homework..."

Little sister knocked the door.

"Kyon... I'm not going to answer the phone the next time. All I hear is silence and then the phone hangs up."

Silence? Could it be Nagato? Nah, she wouldn't do that. If she called, why didn't she ask for me? Wait! Does this mean it could be a problem?

I grabbed my cellphone and entered Nagato's number. But before I hit the "call" button, my phone rang again.

"Hello?"

"..."

"Nagato, is that you?"

"Yes."

"Was it you the past two calls?"

"Yes. Sorry for not answering, I'm in serious trouble."

"Trouble? Serious! Is it an enemy?"

"Not enemies... I'm becoming unstable again."

"Wait, what do you mean unstable?"

"..."

"Where are you?"

"My appartment."

"Wait for me. I'll be RIGHT THERE!"

I quickly got out of the house with my bike. After a few minutes of pedaling as fast as I could, I finally arrived at Nagato's appartment, and rang.

"..."

"It's me", I said.

"Hurry", she said, before making the door buzz.

If Nagato asked me to hurry, I knew she was in deep trouble. I nearly panicked. I got in the elevator, hoping she would be fine. When I got to the floor, she was already there, waiting for me. That's strange. Normally I have to knock and she opens. What was it different this time, that she was waiting for me?

"Thank you for coming", she said.

"Is it serious?"

"Serious, but it is not critical yet. We have all night to talk. Please sit down."

I sighed in relief. If Nagato said we had all night, i could be much more relaxed. Nagato had the tea cups ready for us, so I sat down.

"What happened, Nagato?"

"... it's complicated to explain. Would you like some tea?"

Nagato, I'm more interested in your problems, I really don't want you to waste your time on serving me tea.

"No, thanks."

"I insist."

Nagato was ready to serve, and the cup was on my side of the table. I felt guilty for originally rejecting her offer, so I accepted.

She sat down. I really wanted to know what was going on with her.

"Sorry for calling you."

"Nagato, you can call me at any time."

"Thank you."

"Well, what happened?"

"I have become unstable again."

"You mean... like that night?"

"Yes", she said, lowering her gaze. "The apparently-random data intruding my system has accumulated beyond the acceptable level. It has not reached the same levels of... that night, but I'm still afraid of what I might do if things get worse."

This sounded serious, indeed.

"Did you try asking for backup?"

"None of my coleagues is able to decipher the data noise in my system. At first we thought it could be some enemy virus infecting my system, but when we identified the source of the noise, it turned out to be myself."

So it is your emotions after all.

"Did you consider the possibility I mentioned the other day?"

"Yes. I have been reading psychology books as you suggested. There is no way to calculate any probability of your theory being correct. But if it is, then there must be a correlation between the noise and my own emotions."

"That's right."

"Part of the noise... includes audiovisual information of events that could take place in the next few minutes or hours - as if I had synchronized with other differential temporal variations of myself, but no exchange actually takes place, and the events don't take place at all in at least 99% of the cases."

Audiovisual... what?

"You could call it dreams, and daydreams."

"You mean you dream regularly?"

"You could interpret it as that. But recently, the 'dreams' have been more aggressive, and the events depicted in them are usually worst cases. The data also includes theoretical status of the danger levels in those situations, and suggested immediate actions to take in such cases. But the combined data is not logical at all."

I didn't quite understand what she was talking about. But the words "worst cases," "danger" and "suggested immediate actions" told me that they weren't common dreams. Maybe...

"You mean these dreams are actually nightmares?"

"Yes. When the theoretical danger levels reach their peak, I often find myself unable to avoid the depicted danger in those theoretical situations. Then, I suffer a partial and temporary system shutdown. After each reboot, the noise levels drop to an acceptable level, but they never drop to zero. I have not been able to purge the audiovisual data, either, nor the basic human emotions related to them."

Aw, poor Nagato. You've been having nightmares. It began to make sense. For a human being, a nightmare is a pretty natural event. It helps us survive. Cavemen had nightmares about beasts running after them, so that when they would find one, they knew exactly what to do. But Nagato wasn't a human being - she was a humanoid alien interface. It could be shocking for her to have nightmares. But why did she have nightmares? What did she fear? I didn't understand.

Perhaps noticing my hesitation and my worried face, Nagato stood up slowly, before saying:

"Please wait."

She turned around, and walked to the bookcase, taking out a book. She opened the book, and took out a piece of paper. She sat down.

"I tried to interpret my daydreams and emotions before the events of December 18th, when I lost control of myself. The amount of information extracted is minimal, as it is only a low-resolution approximation."

"Oh?" Hey, what else could you answer to that? I said nothing else and awaited for her response.

"After I wrote the 'Untitled' pieces for the Literature Club, you told me to write more poems when I felt like it. I considered this would be a good chance to do it."

"Good. May I take a look at it?"

She held the piece of paper with her both hands, staring at it (not me), and paused for two or three seconds.

"... I'm not so sure."

"Why not?"

"I'm not sure if I want you to read it."

"Well, if you want to share it any other day, you're all welcome. I can wait."

"..."

Nagato, you're not like this. What's going on with you? You're getting me scared.

"Wait."

"Yes?" I answered instantly.

"Here.", she said, giving me a folded piece of paper.

The top page (folded) read:

"'Private'.

by Nagato Yuki.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT AND ACCEPTANCE OF TERMS."

What is this, a Software License Agreement?

I kept reading.

"Please abstain from reading this work until I explicitly approve it.

Failure to comply will result in my immediate and irrevocable resignation from the SOS brigade."

Wow. You're serious about it, aren't you? Well, that's fine, it means you really appreciate your privacy, and I do think it's a sign of you beginning to get in touch with your own feelings.

"Are you sure you want me to read this?"

"Please do..."

I was still unfolding the paper, when Nagato's words chilled my spine.

"... before I change my mind."

Nagato was really feeling insecure today. Nagato, this isn't like you. What's going on in your head?

"Private".

by Nagato Yuki.

Infecting my system

high entropy seen,

perhaps it's encrypted

and I lack the key.

Helpless to stop it

I can only observe

how noise keeps intruding

my wishes, myself.

I try to locate

the source, I need help.

The source is myself?

[Check is not OK.]

So, this is just as she told me. About her feelings and the analysis done on her. I kept reading.

The code's now infected,

I can't find a cure.

There's only one constant,

the thought: "I want you".

Wait. What's that supposed to mean? Who is "you"? And what do you want "you" for? Or maybe... just maybe... nah. It can't be possible.

Was I made defective?

Confused, I stand.

Is it human nature?

[The system has crashed.]

This is unexpected,

did not go as planned.

Traceback requested,

[The system has crashed.]

Poor Nagato. She must have been feeling helpless about it. But I had always thought that what she did was related to her being sick tired of Haruhi. What does "I want you" have to do with this? It doesn't make sense. I had to really know what this was about.

"Nagato..."

"Yes?"

"After you lost control of yourself, and before you changed the world..."

If someone heard me saying that, they would be thinking I was crazy. Am I so twisted that I consider "changing the world" a rare, but still normal event to talk about?

"... do you think you could describe what you experienced during that period of time?"

"Let me think how I could put that into words."

"I remember my actions and my reasons to do them. But while I was doing it, I was unable to stop. As if something else had taken total control of my body and my mind. But, at the same time, that something else was myself. I feared the consequences of not doing it more than the consequences of doing it."

"Hmm... I think I'm beginning to understand."

"At the same time, I feel very sorry -"

Now I had to interrupt her.

"Don't say that", I remarked, raising my index finger. "You know I already forgave you for it."

"..."

"Anything else you want to say?"

"I... wasn't exactly sure of the actual reason for my actions. But the emotions and... images... in my mind... they were intolerable."

"Intolerable?"

"Perhaps you could say they were... painful."

I sighed. "I understand." As soon as I continued to read the poem, I noticed that Nagato began looking at the floor (or the table, whatever). Perhaps she was being shy about it? Perhaps she felt embarrassed?

If I try to acquire it,

vanish it will;

If I remain silent,

away it will drift.

Acquire? Acquire what? This was the most cryptic part of the poem. If she tries to acquire it, it will vanish. But why would it vanish? The third part gave a hint. Remaining silent... so acquiring 'it' means that she will speak about something. Just what is 'it'?

[Request: Abort mission]

What the - Was she really planning to leave us?

Message not sent.

I had made a promise,

is this called pain?

Yes, Nagato. It is pain. I kept reading.

I want to speak out,

But fears made me weak.

I want to shut up,

but then I feel sick.

The code's now infected,

I can't find a cure.

There's only one constant,

the thought: "I want you".

I think I read that before... yes, it's duplicated. So why the need to repeat it? Is it that important? And again, what does "I want you" mean? Who, or what are you talking to?

Was I made defective?

Confused, I stand.

Is it human nature?

[The system has crashed.]

No matter how confusing some parts were, I was still amazed. Since Nagato wrote that other poem for the Literature Club, she has been more able to express her feelings.

"December the 18th, huh?"

I read the poem again. Those two phrases stood over the others: "I want you", and "Request: Abort mission". Does that mean Nagato wanted to leave the SOS brigade and return with her boss? Nagato, why didn't you tell me? Then the poem began to actually make sense. "I want to speak out, but fears made me weak." Nagato tried to tell me, but for some reason she just couldn't. She was having a crisis, alright...

"Yes, I'm beginning to understand. May I share my opinion?"

"..."

Her silence told me that perhaps she was afraid of what I was going to say, but at the same time, she accepted it. So I spoke.

"That day, or night... you had a nervous breakdown. Nagato, it's normal, you don't have to feel ashamed for it."

"..."

I read the poem yet another time, and this part got me curious. "If I try to acquire it, vanish it will; If I remain silent, away it will drift." What does it mean? I hadn't realized before that this was written just before the part about aborting the mission.

"Nagato, did you really want to abort your mission?"

Nagato took some time to answer. "I was tempted."

"Why?"

"I could not keep going on."

"Why? What was so painful? Was it some enemy? Your boss? Haruhi? What?"

"..."

Nagato didn't answer that question. Why didn't she answer? Perhaps she was trying to find the right words?

"It is still difficult for me to say it..."

"Does the text before 'Request: Abort mission" have anything to do with it?"

Nagato remained silent, looking at the floor. Then she nodded.

"What does it mean?"

"... I can't tell you right now."

It seems I'm beginning to get closer to the "X" in the map. "Nagato, are you forbidden to tell me, or there's another reason you can't tell me?"

"I..."

She started a sentence but didn't finish it.

"I... it is very difficult for me to say this."

I noticed a lot of tension in the air. What Nagato was going to tell me was very important. Pay attention, Kyon, pay attention to every movement of her. Here eyebrows, her blinking, any movement in her mouth, hesitation... pay attention!

"It's... the other reason I called you. The correlation between this and my system unstability is exceedingly large, and I need advise. I'm just not sure if you're the right person I should ask."

What? Anything! Nagato, you know you can count on me. Just... say it.

"..."

Nagato began looking at the floor again.

"I think..."

Yes?

Nagato finished her sentence.

"I think... I'm in love."

My jaw dropped in both shock and disbelief. Wait, what?

(end of chapter 1)


	2. The confession of Nagato Yuki

**Chapter 2. The confession of Nagato Yuki.**

"It's... the other reason I called you. It's related to my system unstability, and I need your advise."

What? Anything! Nagato, you know you can count on me. Just... say it.

"..."

Nagato began looking at the floor again.

"I think... ... I'm in love."

Wait, what? Nagato? In love? My jaw dropped. I couldn't believe it. Of all the people in the SOS brigade, Nagato would be the last person I would believe could have fallen in love.

"..."  
"..."

The silence was now mutual. This is nuts. Nagato... in love?

"Nagato... do you really understand the term 'being in love'? Are you sure about this?"  
Without raising her gaze, she explained further.  
"Yes. I understand from the time your friend wanted to meet me. I've also read abundant literature about it. I'm... still not sure... but it's the only possible explanation I could find, and there are many correlations between the literature and my own personal experiences."

If she really fell in love, it would be the final proof that she had feelings. But I needed to confirm something.

"Did you try to confirm it with your boss?"  
"The Integrated Data Sentient Entity still interprets this as unwanted data. It wasn't until you told me about it being my own feelings that I began to explore this possibility. After all, it was you who said that perhaps emotions manifested differently between human brains and human interfaces like me."

"Yes, I said that... So, who's the lucky guy? I'd like to meet him."  
"I can't tell."

Aw, bummer. Just when things began to get interesting. Wait a minute! Who else could Nagato fall in love with, YOU IDIOT! Don't you remember what happened after December the 18th? You met the other Nagato, and she blushed before you! More than once! She even smiled to you! And when you went to her appartment, remember how she held you by your sleeve? Kyon, you idiot! And why did she choose you as the only person who remembered the original world? She chose you! YOU!

As I was realizing this, I noticed that she was nervous. Very nervous, in fact. I really don't know if I could see a hint of her eyebrows itching, or maybe it was a microscopic unstability in her tone of voice, I could just tell that she was very nervous. Maybe... she suspects that I suspect? Quick, Kyon! Say something!

"So, that's why you called me? Do you want me to help you confess to this guy?"  
"I'm still not sure... I'm still afraid of going astray again. At first, I thought it would suffice with not being able to synchronize. While it helped... I feel like I'm losing control of myself again."

I began to truly understand what was going on.

"So... that's the other reason you called, right? You needed help and you didn't know who to call."  
Nagato paused for a second and a half, and then nodded.

I sighed, and put my hand on Nagato's shoulder. "Nagato, please don't worry. The worst thing you can  
do right now is to worry."  
Nagato opened her mouth, but did not speak. And yet, I could notice she was trying to tell me something. Nagato, you're scared to death, aren't you? Poor thing...  
"I don't know what to do... I don't want it to happen again..."

She paused for about three seconds.

"I'm very scared."  
When I looked at her, she looked like a little boy who just had a nightmare and wanted her mommy to help her. But it wasn't a nightmare, and the fear was real. She just had no one else to rely on. So... lonely.

She said this, and still, she completely avoided eye contact. She just kept looking down at the floor. She's probably thinking, 'As long as I don't look at his eyes, I will be fine'. Dammit, I wanted you to show your emotions, but this is too much! Just how much stress are you going through?

I must make a pause here to explain better how I was feeling at the moment. You would probably wouldn't believe me if I told you that I had forgotten completely that I realized she had fallen for me. Perhaps I didn't quite understand the consequences of it. But at that moment, I was more worried about her than about myself. And what I was worried about, is that she would just accumulate all those emotions. And without a way to vent them out, I was afraid she would burst and completely lose control of herself. Wait a second - that's why she called me, right? The letter had nothing to do about it, she was much more scared of losing control. And yet, this fear, was part of what she feared. Hey, that might work.

"Listen to me, Nagato."  
Now, what was I going to say?  
"Wait, let me first organize my thoughts. Let me see..."  
I took a deep breath.  
"Perhaps it would be better if I explain what I think is going on through your mind. Look, let's put this poem you wrote aside. Because that's only part of your problem, right?"  
Nagato nodded briefly and took the poem. She opened a nearby book, and put the poem inside. Somehow, what was written in that poem was no longer of her worries. And I don't know exactly how I noticed, but she seemed at least a bit better now. I sighed in relief.  
But I had forgotten that I hadn't eaten my dinner yet. And just as Nagato was having problems hiding her emotions, I was having problems hiding my hunger. Why am I telling you this? Because my stomach spoke for me. As soon as Nagato heard my stomach growl, she stood up. "Let me prepare dinner".

I wanted to be polite and refuse, but I still hadn't finished organizing my thoughts. Let's see, she wrote a poem because she was falling in love. But why is she so scared of her emotions? Well, it's natural that she feels a little bit scared. Now I began to wonder if I really was this person she fell in love with. If it wasn't me, who could it be? Let's see if my experience reading romantic novels helps. Let's just, for now, assume that Nagato is a normal, shy, teenage girl. Maybe she was thinking... 'how can I confess to him?' 'What if he rejects me?' 'Does he have a girlfriend already?'

Then it struck me as a big flash of light. I finished understanding what she was really worried about. If the man she's in love with is me, and she confesses her love... it would be fine for me. But what would happen if there was another person interested in "him"? And what if "that person" found out? If "that person" was an ordinary human, it wouldn't have any relevance. The problem is, that in my case, "that person" was none other than...

Suzumiya Haruhi.

If Haruhi finds out about Nagato's affection for me, she will get jealous. If she gets jealous... well, you know what will happen.

How could I forget what happened before the day Haruhi almost destroys the world? So, what would happen if it wasn't Asahina-san, but Nagato? But there's a big difference. Nagato isn't just like Asahina-san, and her feelings are not the same feelings I had for Asahina-san. For me it was just plain, mundane, perverted lust. But Nagato's feelings are more pure, and she is much more determined. From Haruhi's viewpoint, Nagato could become a much greater threat than Asahina-san.

Haruhi, damn you! Why do you always have to make things more complicated! Okay, let's think... let's just assume that I pretend I don't know who Nagato is in love with. Holy shit... Nagato is in love with me? For real? This is too much for me to handle. Take a deep breath, Kyon... Nagato needs your help. Just as Haruhi chose you to regulate her outbursts of madness, Nagato...

Nagato needs someone to help her deal... with her emotions... THAT'S IT! Now, let's see... which human in the SOS brigade can help Nagato?

Let's make a list.  
* Haruhi? NO F'ING WAY! In fact let's remove her from the list. I don't even know why I mentioned her.  
* Koizumi? Nah, I don't think so. He's pretty good at quantum physics and philosophical theories, but I doubt he's up to the task.  
* Myself? If I really am "the one", it would only bring her more trouble.  
So the only person left is...

Yes. That young, well-measured crybaby. Asahina-san. Hey, why not? Asahina-san really seems in touch with her own emotions. But I wonder if she's the right person. She's always scared of Nagato. Yeah, I can imagine her face when I tell her: "Asahina san? Nagato's becoming very unstable and she needs you to stay with her. Alone." Heh. Good one. But wait, if she can't do it... I can't leave Nagato alone like this! Who else do I know that could help Nagato?

Think, Kyon... think! I wonder if... maybe... just maybe...

The image of a young adult, smiling woman dressed in teacher's attire, winking at me, came to my mind. The adult Asahina-san. She's more than experienced in dealing with her own emotions than anyone of us. In fact, she's perfect! Now the only thing I had to do is to contact Asahina-san (small) and tell her that I needed to send a message to her boss. We would meet in our usual place (that bench in the park), and I will explain everything then.

But let's go back to right here, right now. What should I tell Nagato? Ah, yes. That phrase I remembered from.. who was it? Nevermind. The phrase was: "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself". Maybe this phrase will calm her down.

Ok, I'm ready. Nagato's just finished preparing the instant noodles.  
"Thank you, I was really hungry".  
"It is no problem. After all, I was the one who called."

As we finished eating, she took the dishes to the kitchen, and I was more than ready to talk.  
"Nagato-san, could you please sit down?"  
She sat down without saying a word.  
Okay, Kyon, don't screw it up now. Please, if there's a god out there which is not Haruhi, please put the right words in my mouth.  
"Please correct me in anything that I'm wrong. Basically, you've been experienced a lot of new emotions, and you don't know how to handle them, right?"  
"Correct."  
"These new emotions that you cannot handle... one of their causes, is falling in love with this person, right?"  
Nagato was about to shake her head, but then she nodded. Was it just my mind, or she hesitated? I had never seen Nagato this nervous before. Not even when we were trapped in that endless August.

"And you're trying to handle these emotions and fears, but you can't. And the more you think about how to get rid of them, the stronger they get, right? And the stronger they get, the more you try to get rid of them. And the more powerless you feel about them, the more panic you feel, and it's like a vicious circle, so you don't know what to do... and you know your comrades can't help you with this, so you're on your own, feeling lonely... and desperate... and if you could scream and cry with all your lungs, you would, but it still wouldn't help at all, right? And then, somehow, my picture popped up in your mind, so you called me for help."

Whoa, did I say all that?

Nagato raised her gaze and looked at me with her black pupils focused right on my eyes. As if she was asking me a question. Nagato, don't tell me you're surprised that I read your mind.  
"... that is exactly how I felt. How did you know?"  
What do you mean 'How do I know'? I'm a human being, I know you! I began to smile. I knew I was right. Yes, Nagato, yes, I know what to do! I put both of my hands over her shoulders and smiled. Well, maybe it wasn't a million-watt smile like Haruhi's, but I knew I was right. I took a deep breath, and sighed in relief.

"Nagato, please understand, that what you experienced, and what you are experiencing right now, is COMPLETELY NORMAL for a human being. Maybe you weren't created to have emotions, but you have them, that's a fact. The correct answer is not to block them, but to embrace them. You have fears, you're not immune to feeling panic, either. You must accept this as a part of yourself."  
"But... I don't want to go astray again".  
Yes, I understand, Nagato, but that was very different. And I'm not going to leave you in the darkness, now.  
I continued talking:  
"You won't go astray again. The reason you went astray in the first place is that you were not allowed to act upon your own free will; and you weren't allowed to embrace your own emotions. But right now it will be different. I promise.

"..."

Nagato, don't tell me you still don't believe me, please.  
"Nagato, I know this is very difficult for you to understand. But think of yourself as a little baby trying to live in a world which you were not accustomed to. Information is handled very different in the human world than where you came from. You lived in a world without emotions. But you have to accept that you have them. And you need to learn to live with them, without letting them interfere with you."  
"...but..."  
"Right now, I'm sure you have a lot of questions about how to handle these new feelings you're experiencing, right? RIGHT?"  
I grabbed her shoulders a little harder. As if she had admitted defeat, she looked down.  
"Yes."  
"Don't worry, Nagato. I'll get help. I promise."  
I firmly held her hand inside my hands. "You need to trust me on this, Nagato. I know EXACTLY who can help you with your problem."  
"Who?"  
"You'll see. Oh - and don't worry, it's NOT Haruhi."  
"Thank you."

As I was about to leave... I realized I didn't know the ACTUAL reason why she went astray. What was it, that made her take that impulsive decision to change the world?

"Nagato, can I ask you one last question?"  
"..."

"Before you went astray, that night... what happened? Is there something else you haven't told me?"

"..."

"Any hints? ANYTHING?"  
"... it happened after I synchronized. But it's late. You should leave now."  
I sighed again. Oh well, at least we made a good advance. "Don't worry, Nagato. Oh, yes! I was about to tell you this phrase... perhaps it will help you dealing with your emotions in a better way."  
As Nagato was looking at me, expecting my answer, I finally said the phrase that I had been thinking about.

"The only thing you need to fear, is fear itself."  
"... I see..."

Was it just me, or she looked more calm after I said that phrase?

"Good night, Nagato."  
"Good night... and... thank you."  
I felt like hugging her like if she was a lost child. Should I hug her? What if she fell more deeply in love with me? I was about to do it, but something told me it wasn't just the right time.  
"Nagato... if you ever need this kind of help again, call me. Promise?"  
She nodded right away. "Promise."  
I finally left her appartment. Poor Nagato... I never knew she was suffering so much. My eyes felt wet.

What a day. I finally arrived home and got ready to sleep.  
Wait a second... NAGATO IS IN LOVE WITH ME!?!? AGH! How am I supposed to react to this!!!

I couldn't sleep that night. There were so many things I wanted to ask Nagato. I mean, she was in love with me, right? And she was afraid of Haruhi's reactions. But is that alone enough for her to panic?

"It happened after I synchronized."

What happened that early morning of December the 18th? Did she learn some facts about the future? Was she already in love? Was she in love with me? And what could have scared her to the point of having to change the world? Did Haruhi finally left this world and kidnapped me to a new one? Ugh! Don't even think about THAT!

But then... what could it be? What did she learn that was unavoidable? Did I die? Did her mission get accomplished and she had to leave? No, that wouldn't happen because I told her I and Haruhi would rescue her. Wait, I told her that AFTER she had changed the world. Or perhaps there was something more sinister? Had I been kidnapped by the same people who got us stuck in the snowstorm? What was it, Nagato? What did you see?  
Or was it a nightmare that you confused with existing data?

The more I thought about it, the less I could understand. There was no use thinking about it now. All I should focus right now was on getting help for her. But now, it was time to rest.

(End of chapter 2)


	3. The nightmare of Suzumiya Haruhi

**Chapter 3. The nightmare of Suzumiya Haruhi.**

"Meow..."  
"zzz..."  
"Meow..."  
"zzz..."  
BEEP BEEP, BEEP BEEP.

"mmmmnnnnmmmnyyygggmnnnn..."  
Have you ever stayed up late a night before realizing that you go early to school the day after? I'm sure you have. And I felt like one of those buildings in closed space just after being smashed by a giant celestial. Shamisen, you lazy cat, how I envy you. While you only get to eat and sleep, I have to wake up early, go to school, study AND save the world from Suzumiya Haruhi at the same time. Maybe I wouldn't mind being actually recognized as a super hero, but turns out I don't have any superpowers at all. I dont even have my own giant robot to play with.

"Yawn..."

I opened my drawer and checked that the world was stable today. Maybe you can call me paranoid. But since the events of December the 18th, I decided I had to be more careful to avoid panicking all of a sudden. I was keeping in my drawer a paper with my name and age, the names of my schoolmates, our classrooms, the school we went to, and the names of my parents and family. This way, if the universe gets changed, I only have to read the paper and see if it fits with my memory. If anyone asks, I'll just tell them that in case I get a sudden case of Amnesia, I can use this as a backup. That would label me weird, but not crazy.

Yup, today it fits. It's a normal world today. I scrolled down the paper - the names of the SOS brigade members were last so I could read it when I was most awake. There I read the name: "Nagato Yuki", and remembered. I wondered if Nagato could sleep fine.

I took my breakfast and prepared my body and mind to go to school.

"Haruhi's not planning anything weird...  
Haruhi's not planning anything weird...  
Haruhi's not planning anything weird."

Ah, that feels good. If I really can influence Haruhi, I hope a little mantra can calm her feelings. Perhaps I should dedicate a shrine to her and say my prayers? "Oh, great demon goddess Haruhi, please don't destroy the world today." A cold shiver ran through my back when I just thought about that. I better grab my bike and go to school.

The closer I got, the more I began thinking about Nagato. But first I had to go to the SOS Brigade room, and see if Asahina-san was there. Luckily for me, I did not need to go to the brigade room, I spotted her just arriving to school.

Yes, there she was! I couldn't mistake that light brown hair, those voluptuous curves, and that shy attitude whenever she did something clumsy, and yes, she was clumsy. There she was, a cumulus of moe factors with legs, picking up the books she just happened to drop by accident.

"Hey, Asahina-san!"  
"Uh?"  
I approached her, and helped her pick up her notebooks.  
"Oh, hi, Kyon-kun! Thanks!"  
"I need an important favor."  
"Yes?"  
"Could you please arrange me a meeting with your boss today? It's urgent."  
"Um... I can send a message... huh? Ehh???? You want to talk to my superior in person?"  
Ah, how could I explain to her that I have met her boss more than three times, and that her boss is a mature version of herself? Of course I don't need to worry about that, since I promised not to tell her. But what should I tell her now?  
"Just relay the message."  
"But why do you need to meet my superior in person?"  
"It's... complicated. How should I put it... classified information."  
"Aw, kyon-kun, not you too!"  
"Please? It's for Nagato, she needs our help."  
"Nagato-san? What's wrong with her?"  
"It's a long story. Just tell your boss to drop me a message in my shoe box. Thank you."  
"Okay. I will."  
"See ya."

I arrived to my shoe locker, and inside I found a freshly-scented, pink colored letter with some writings on it.

"I received your message. I'll be at the usual place at 6PM.  
Sincerely,  
A. Sensei"

Wow. They received my message and I got a reply even before the message was sent. Now that could be a wonderful business model, you know? "Time travel post service. Instant results." Then I wondered what would happen if suddenly Asahina-san couldn't send the message. Would this create a universal paradox, one of those things that can destroy the world? Well, let's hope that doesn't happen yet.

"Kyon-kun!"  
There she was, again.  
"Yes?"  
"I sent the message."  
"Yes, I already got my reply."  
"Oh... can I see it?"  
"Sorry. Classifed information. See ya later", I said, turning around, raising my hand and walking away.

Then I went to the brigade room.

*Knock knock*  
"Hello?"  
I opened the door. Sitting on a chair, there was the girl in sailor uniform, with her eyes looking at me.

"..."

"You were expecting me?"  
She nodded.  
I closed the door.

"Nagato, how was it yesterday? Are you feeling any better?"  
"Worse."  
"Why, what happened?"  
"Nightmare."  
"Mind telling me about it?"  
The silent girl shook her head, and then looked down to continue looking at her book. And I say looking at it, because I noticed that she wasn't actually reading. And then she spoke again.  
"Something worse happened..."  
"What?"  
"Suzumiya Haruhi."  
"What do you mean Haruhi? What did she do?"  
"The cause is unknown, but she received some of the random data that was affecting me."  
"What?"  
"She saw my nightmare, and confronted me about it in a shared dream. She tried to access all of my data, and I barely escaped by using a decoy before waking up. I'm scared - No. Terrified is the appropriate word."

My God. Just when things were about to get better, here comes Haruhi again and messes everything up. But first, I have to give some words of comfort. I began to speak, as I approached her.

"Nagato... look. Haruhi's not stupid. She will just dismiss her dreams as that. She's not going to hurt you. After all, she doesn't know it's YOUR dream. She will just think of it as a dream of her own, or, at the worst case, a premonition. Look - In case she tells me about her dream, I'll try to tell some psychobabble to her and convince her it's about her own subconscious. Are you OK with that?"

I was going to put my hand over her shoulder, but she quickly stood up and pushed me away. My head barely touched the thin utility locker that was on the wall. I heard a mild "clank" behind me.

"Stay away."  
"But, why?" I said, stepping forward.  
Nagato grabbed me and threw me to the wall near the door This time, the *thud* was loud.  
"OW!"  
She immediately sat down and reopened her book.  
"Sorry for the head. I'm too scared of Suzumiya Haruhi right now."  
I sighed. "I understand... just one more question, Nagato. The person you referred to in the poem... I really need to know so I can take the appropriate decision to help you. Don't be afraid of telling me, I'm not an idiot. And I'm much more calm than you are right now. Please..."

"..."

"Was it me?"  
She turned her head and stared right at me.

"..."

She didn't answer, but she kept staring at me. My God, her eyes were so sad right now. If I could become invisible and hug you with all my strength, I swear, Nagato, I would right now.

"But, you're afraid of her getting jealous of you?"

She nodded slowly, and her eyes... my God... her eyes looked depressed, and in pain. I even think I could see them getting slowly filled with tears. Was she about to cry?

I couldn't help swallowing. "I understand. But I'll get help, Nagato. I promise."  
"Hurry."

I quickly opened the club room and got out. I closed it, and ran - no, sprinted to Asahina-san's classroom. Damn you, Haruhi, damn you!

"Asahina-san!"  
"Eh? Kyon-kun?"  
"We need to talk, fast!"  
She stepped outside. "What's... going on?"  
"Nagato needs your help. As soon as possible."  
"What, what's going on?" she said, getting out of the classroom (thank God the classes hadn't started).  
"Look, I'll be brief. She's been having horrible nightmares. Right now she's scared to death, and lonely, and in pain. You're the only person who can help her right now, and if you don't, who knows what she might end up doing."  
"Eh? Uuh???"  
"Just go, dammit!"

We arrived as fast as we could to the brigade room, and we opened the door.

"We're here."  
As soon as we opened the door, we saw Nagato. She was staring at us, expecting the help I promised to her.

"...?"

"Asahina-san." I said. "Please escort Nagato to her appartment. We'll just say she got the flu and needed to go home. Nagato, please tell everything you need to Asahina-san. We can help you, but we need you to cooperate. Will you share with Asahina-san all you shared with me?"

Nagato nodded, without saying a word. To the untrained eye, she would look just fine, but to me, she looked so tense it was depressing.

"Asahina-san..."  
I remembered Asahina-san (big)'s words when she talked about herself. 'Please take care of this child'.  
I held Asahina-san's hands and told her.  
"Please take care of this child...

Now that I look back to that moment, maybe it wasn't me who learned that phrase from her, but she learned it from me. Is this how "predetermined events" get to be constructed? Like a car entering a loop, there must be a high probability of the sequence of events being constructed. Maybe Asahina-san (big) learned it from somewhere else in a previous period of time. But now she learned it from me. Anyway, I completed my phrase.

"...after all... she's only four years old."  
"You mean..."  
"Her boss isn't human. I can't comfort her because of Haruhi, and Koizumi barely knows her. She's lonely and desperate. Treat her as you would treat your own daughter. Please!"

Asahina-san looked at Nagato, while Nagato looked back.  
Asahina-san approached her as she would approach a 4 year old kid, and got to her chair. Asahina-san crouched and looked at Nagato's eyes. "Nagato-san... are you scared?"  
Nagato-san nodded.  
"Do you want to go home?"  
She nodded again.  
"Come here."  
Nagato stood up, and Asahina-san hugged her gently. Nagato hugged her back. Asahina-san gently caressed Nagato's hair.  
"Everything will be fine, Nagato-san. You'll see. Everything will be fine."

"..."

A heavy burden had been lifted from my shoulders. It was so gratifying. But at the same time, the scene was so sad I felt like crying all inside. I remembered one of those depressing movies for "all ages" about some kid with a trauma-caused autism, and I couldn't stop looking at Nagato as if she had experienced the same trauma. My throat even felt sore.

As they were leaving the room, Nagato stoped to look at me.

"I'm sorry."  
"Don't worry about me, I'll be fine."  
"I'M SORRY", she said again, this time louder.  
"Just go."

They got out, and I looked at myself in a nearby mirror. Was I sweating, and trembling? This wasn't right. I needed to calm down. I went to the restrooms and washed my head. Then I felt dizzy.

Remember those times I traveled back in time along with Asahina-san, and felt like I was throwing up? I began to feel worse. Fortunately I was already in the restrooms...

Ok, this is gross. Let's play back a scene of Asahina Mikuru's adventures episode 00.

"Huh?" said the bunny girl while being given a very realistic toy AK-47.  
"Uh... eh?"  
"Em...."  
*pulls trigger*  
"AAAAAAAAAAAA" *rattattattattattatt*  
(blank screen)

Back to our main story.

"Kyon, you look tired."  
"Uh huh...."  
"Did you eat well?"  
"I forgot something in the brigade room... I ran a lot... and something I had eaten made me throw up... did I mention I couldn't sleep well?"

Haruhi's face looked as if she had seen a dying rat.  
"Kyon, you need to take care of yourself. Otherwise how can you keep up with the brigade activities?"  
"Oh, I forgot to mention... Nagato's got the flu, and she looked even worse than I. Asahina-san took her to her appartment."  
Haruhi twisted her mouth. "That's not fair! I wanted to restart the brigade activities today! Oh - if you get infected", she threatened, "you'll pay for the days you get absent, understood?"  
I just stared at her with my exhausted, underslept face.  
"Whatever."

Lunch time. I was starving. I was eating my lunch like a hungry wolf when Haruhi offered me some of her lunch.  
"Eat it. You need it."  
"You shouldn't..."  
Haruhi stared at me with her evil eyes, and ordered me.  
"I said... EAT IT. Commander's orders."  
I was hungry so I didn't protest more. I needed as much energy as I needed to help Nagato. I really hope she's feeling better.

Haruhi turned the chair and began to talk. "You know, I had this weird dream and I can't stop thinking about it.", she said while eating from her lunch box.  
"What dream?" (Please, Haruhi, you need to tell me what you dreamed.)  
"You wouldn't understand."  
I stared at her with a daring smile. "If you don't want to talk about it, why mentioning it in the first place? Besides, didn't you tell me that day that if I kept secrets to myself I would start feeling sick?" (Hmmm, now that I think of it, wasn't this the reason for Nagato's crisis?)  
"Ok, Ok. Here goes."

I began to pay attention to whatever Haruhi told me. This was the perfect opportunity to find something that could help Nagato.

"I was in a library. I don't know why, but it felt like if the whole brigade room had become a library. I even recall seeing some of the brigade room stuff there. There was the sun on the wall, on some corridor there were Mikuru-chan's clothes. And there were a lot of books. I really don't know how I recognized those books, but I had the feeling I had read a lot of them. And I 'remembered' nice feelings when I looked at them. I mean, isn't that weird? How can I remember a feeling about something that I haven't even done?"

I really don't know what was more interesting about Haruhi's talk - her dream, or all her non-verbal communication. Remember the time we played baseball and she was giving all kinds of weird signals to Asahina-san? Well, it wasn't as ridiculous as that, but she seemed to grow a mouth in each one of her arms.

"Anyway, I felt like if I had been in love with those books. Then I approached a small bookcase. My favorite books were there. Not my actual favorite books, but the books I "knew" while I was in the dream. I felt like crying, because they had many pages and I had only read a few of them. In particular..."

"Yes?"

Haruhi drank some juice and continued speaking.  
"Those books felt alive, as if everytime I read them they told me something different. And there was a book which I treasured the most. I opened the safe box..."  
"Wait, what safebox?"  
"I don't know, that's how dreams are, do you want me to suppose dreams are logical?"  
"Sorry. Go on."  
"I opened a safebox that was where the small bookcase was earlier. And inside there was a book with your name."  
"My name?"  
"Yes, it said "Kyon" on the cover. What's funny is that the book was divided in various sections with bookmarks. One said 'Day 1, differential... something, I don't really remember, but I knew it was related to Yuki, as the words used were very technical. Anyway, this was "my" book, the book I loved, and I felt the book loved me, too. And the bookmarks marked relative dates in time. So, there was this bookmark called 'advise'. This is where the dream starts getting weird."  
"Go on."  
"I wanted to read the sections 'advise' and 'comfort' because I was scared of a monster. What is curious is that the monster's name was in the same bookcase."  
"And what was the monster's name?"  
"Research subject". But then the book had many covers. One of the cover said "friend", and another said "enemy", and another said "danger", as if the monster had many names. It gave me the impression that at first, the monster was friendly, but then I unknowingly became the monster's enemy. Also, I didn't actually read the names, but I knew those were the names given to the book. And the last cover... I didn't open it. That cover contained the monster's human name, and I was scared of even remembering it. I knew what the name was, wait - in the dream, I knew... that I knew the name. But I actually didn't. Anyway, this is what I don't understand. At first I was reading your book, and then I was suddenly reading the monster's book. So I took the monster's book and put it back on the bookcase, because I was afraid of what the monster would do if I dropped his book. But then the book looked at your book, and I was reading 'advise'. I turned the page to 'comfort' and the monster got angry at me. It was... jealous of your book. And then I got more scared.

Then the monster was just behind me. I swear to you", she said, still eating her lunch. "I was scared to death. I hadn't been more scared in my entire life. So I kept running from the monster. I kept running, holding the book, but I knew that the book belonged to the monster. Still, the book didn't want to be with the monster. And I wanted to be with the book. I felt as if the book wanted to help me. I wanted to keep the book forever, but the book was silent about that. I think the book was also afraid of the monster.

"So I kept running in the library, and the monster was burning all of my books. Well, they weren't books anymore, they were computer files. and the monster was hacking into my computer, and all the files were being deleted. I told it to stop, and I began crying..."

Haruhi drank some juice, or milk, or whatever, to pass her food. She took a deep breath.  
"So, I gave the book to the monster, and then I saw the monster eating the book. And everything turned black. And it was raining, I was crying... and then I wasn't myself."  
"What do you mean you weren't yourself?"  
"There was a pond in the rain... and I saw my reflection on the pond. It was Yuki's face. Then I woke up."

"I see..."

"Wait, I'm not finished. I woke up in the same library of the dream, like if I had been dreaming inside the dream. Has it ever happened to you? Nevermind. I heard Yuki's voice. She asked me. 'How did you get in here?' And I was shocked, she was scared of me. This isn't the normal Yuki we see reading everyday, she looked like if she had seen a ghost in a horror film. I don't know what shocked me more: The fact that she was scared, or that her expressions were crystal clear, as if she was a completely different Yuki.

The point is... she was scared. Then, I followed her... I wanted to ask her."  
"Ask her what?"  
"I don't know... everything! I felt as if she had been keeping many secrets from me. Otherwise, why would she be scared of me? As if she had stolen my things, or something. I got mad at her for keeping all those secrets from me, I also felt insulted because she didn't trust me, I'm not so sure why I was mad. So I began looking for her inside the computer... you know, like in 'The Matrix', and when I found her, I was still in the library. She was crying, and bleeding, looking for help... I took her glasses... by the way, why did she stop using glasses?"

"I don't know." I said, shaking my head.

"Anyway, I took her glasses, and then I saw a book lying next to the glasses. It was the monster's book... and the name that I didn't want to read... had my name written on it. And then I suddenly knew that I was the monster, and the library was the entire universe, don't ask me how, I just knew it, and I had burned it all. So I looked at her, and she was dead. I had killed her. So I woke up in my bed, sweating, and scared..."

She looked like she hadn't finished her sentence.

"And crying?"

"Yes! I mean, this is the weirdest dream I've had in my entire life. And I've have weird dreams"  
Don't tell me, I believe you. I looked down. From all what she told me, I felt like crying for poor Nagato, but I didn't want Haruhi to find out. So I just rubbed my eyes and sighed to pretend I was tired. Well, I WAS tired, so I didn't have to pretend much.

"You're right. I bet Freud would have a field day with it."  
Haruhi had finished her lunch by then, so she just stared at the window.

"I still wonder... why Yuki? Why you, why me? What happened to Koizumi, and Mikuru-chan? Why weren't they in the dream?"

I wiped my tears trying not to make her suspicious. "Oh, but they were in the dream, remember? They were books in 'your' favorite bookcase."  
"Oh, you're right."  
"Well, I see two things. The main protagonists of the dream were you and Nagato-san. That should be obvious by now."  
"Uh huh..."  
"So, in the dream, Nagato was afraid of you, and you burned all of the stuff important to her. Her whole universe... so to speak."  
"Hmm... makes sense..." she said, holding her chin with her left hand.  
"Now that I Think about it... didn't you take the Literature club room to start the SOS brigade? Perhaps she feels that you invaded her space and began taking over it..."  
"But it wasn't her dream, it was mine."  
"Sorry, what I meant to say, is that you... feel guilty because you took the Literature club room..."  
"That sounds better, too, but she gave me permission, remember?"  
"Well, the problem is that she didn't know you, so you just came in, began shouting, intruding her space..."  
I lowered my voice for the next few words. "Molesting Asahina-san," all in front of a shy bookworm who is having a very hard time expressing her feelings... perhaps she was overwhelmed by your presence and got scared of you, and you feel guilty about it. Because you have a much stronger ki than her. I mean, the super-utility sports player against a poor bookworm? Give me a break! Compared to her mouse personality, you're a 'monster' in comparison. How was she, the most shy student on all the planet, supposed to say 'no' to Suzumiya Haruhi? And I doubt you would have accepted a 'no' for an answer."  
"Hmmm..."

Haruhi thought about it for a few seconds. Her expression made it clear that she neither accepted nor rejected the idea.

"I'm still not sure... but what about the book? That's supposed to be you, right?"  
"I think you know the answer for that one. Think for a bit."

"Hmmmm... agh, I still don't get it! Kyon, if you have an idea just spit it out, will ya!"  
I was walking on dangerous ground. I had to be very careful about this. Careful... careful... watch out for the traps...  
"Okay, just promise you won't get mad at me."  
"Of course I won't."  
"Okay, I'm saying what I think, but you need to promise you'll hear it all and not get angry all of a sudden."  
"Why would I get angry?"  
"Because..." what will I say now? Think, Kyon, think! Think Freud, think psychologist... that's it! "... I'll be talking about your biggest fears and deepest emotions. That's what dreams are about, after all."  
"Hmm.... you're right. Okay, I'll promise I won't get mad. Please, Interpret my dream."

Haruhi had finished her lunch by now, and rested her chin on her both hands.

"I think you're jealous of Nagato-san and you feel guilty about it." Yup, that should be it.  
"What? Why should I be jealous of her?"  
"Well, you are the commander of the SOS brigade. So everything you do for her, and for any of us, is an obligation. In contrast, she sees me, OR you think she sees me, as her best friend. Or her only male friend, for that matter."  
"Hmmm... you mean I'm jealous of her... for YOU? You got to be kidding. And why should I have a nightmare just about it?"  
"You still don't get it, do you?" Of course you don't, you idiot, if you were sensible for other people's feelings you wouldn't steal and blackmail anyone who opposes your Majesty.  
"No, what?"  
"You're afraid of her falling in love with me. Or worse, maybe SHE is afraid of falling in love with me, and you let her be afraid because it's much more convenient for you. In other words, she feels lonely and you don't even know if she cries alone in her appartment, begging for just some love. And while the only thing she can do about it is reading books and fantasizing about relationships in dating-sim games, you could blackmail her, embarrass her in public or throw all her precious books to the garbage if you ever get jealous of her. And, the only opportunity she has right now of getting a boyfriend is me and Koizumi. But it should be obvious right now that you're much closer to me than to Koizumi. I mean, have you ever talked to him seriously about anything?"

"... no..."  
"So... maybe she IS jealous of you, and feels miserable about it. Have you thought about that? How could she stand that loneliness? Who knows, maybe the only reason why she accepted joining the brigade was because she was feeling lonely," (I'm such a damn liar about this one!) "and you're making her feel more miserable every day of her life."

"Or maybe..." I said to her, looking right at her eyes. "Maybe she wants a man to listen to her feelings and comfort her, but she's afraid of what you might do to her if you see me hugging her. I mean, look at the ruckus you made when you got jealous of Asahina-san." Of course you made a ruckus, don't try to deny it, because you were about to destroy the world, and only a kiss from your Prince Charming could calm you down.

"You're an idiot."  
"Oh yeah? Well, tell me, how many men have given Nagato a hug whenever she felt lonely? GO AHEAD, PICK A NUMBER!"

I didn't notice the whole cafeteria began to shut up and stare at us. But right now I needed to pass my message. And... Haruhi didn't reply. Jackpot! She stayed quiet. Well, buckle your seatbelt Miss Almighty, because I'm not finished. I still have many things to tell you and I won't shut up until I'm done.

"I know you don't like falling in love. You chose to live the chaste life of a medieval paladin on your own, but Nagato did not. She wants to fall in love, have a guy send her presents, hug her, kiss her, even sleep over? I don't know... and she can't because only the bravest warriors would dare to step a foot on the domains of the SOS brigade.

So her only possible choice to be at least a little happy and a little less lonely is me, who has this tag written on my forehead that says 'Property of Suzumiya Haruhi'."

Haruhi's eyes showed true belief. She really was believing what I was telling her. Calm down, Kyon, don't ruin it... don't let this get personal. I sighed, and calmed down. "So that's what the dream means. She wants a man to care for her, and her best chance is probably me, but that's an impossible goal thanks to you. So she feels very, VERY lonely, and you're afraid to accept that you're partly responsible for it."

"And couldn't you give her some words of comfort, or hug her, or something?"  
Okay, that does it!

"**OF COURSE NOT, YOU IDIOT!**" I said, standing up. "**SHE WON'T ALLOW ME TO BECAUSE SHE FEELS THREATENED BY YOU!** And she told me."  
"... what did you say?"

Oh crap, crap crap crap! Now you've really ruined it, Kyon, you idiot!  
Haruhi grabbed me by the tie. "Why didn't you tell me something so important!!!"  
I swallowed. "She asked me not to."  
"But..."

Haruhi looked at me, and her gaze felt like a chainsaw going through my brains as if I was in some kind of survival horror game.  
"Kyon, answer me one last question. And you better tell me the truth or I'll kick your ass to a parallel universe."  
"What is it?"  
"Is it really the flu, or she didn't want to see me? TELL ME! I think I have the right to know!"  
Should I really tell her the truth? Well, after looking at Nagato's face, I knew Haruhi should feel at least a little bit guilty about it. But you know what? I became angry at that moment. I just remembered all the times Asahina-san cried, and Nagato's crisis, damn it, I couldn't keep myself in silence anymore.

I looked at her fiercely. Well, if the world's going to end, it better end with Haruhi knowing the consequences of her stupid behavior. I'm tired of this. "Do you really want to know?" I told her. "Well, yes, she had a nervous breakdown today, and it's NOT the first time. The other time it was also because of you. Satisfied?"  
Haruhi looked at me with rage. "Why... why didn't you..."  
She clenched her fist and was about to beat me with all her strength. Go ahead, beat me, destroy my face with your stupid rage, because nothing in this world is your fault. That's all you know to do, destroying stuff and blaming everyone else. Come on, hit me with all you've got! I may be gentle enough to forgive you for making Asahina-san cry, but this time you've gone too far! What are you waiting for? Eh? COME ON! PUNCH ME!

But at the last second, she didn't. Maybe it was the fiery look on my eyes that made her stop. Her eyes got wet, and without saying a word, she turned around. She was about to kick a chair, but she just pushed it a little bit. She wiped her face with her uniform. Did she... was she actually crying? Everyone looked at Haruhi, and when she ran out of the cafeteria they stared at me. All of them. I couldn't stand that (I already had too many problems), so I cleaned up my stuff and left.

The next class, Haruhi didn't show up. But she did come for the last class of the day.

Have you studied about the Cuban missiles crisis, when Castro received several nukes from the U.S.S.R, threatening the entire american continent? Well, that's how the last class felt. I was like the U.S., and Haruhi was Cuba. Except that, well, I didn't have any missiles with me. I didn't even dare to say anything now, I felt it would just pull the trigger.

When classes finished, Haruhi stood up, without daring to look at me in the face. "I'm going home", she said. Her voice sound broken. As soon as she left, people began chattering. I was approached by Taniguchi.

"Kyon, did something happen between you two?"  
"Yes, how did you find out, Sherlock?"  
"Well, this is the first time I saw Suzumiya-san like this. Did you look at her face?"  
"Actually... no. To be honest, I was too scared."  
"Okay, good luck, champ", Taniguchi said, patting my shoulder. "The next time you have an argument like this, at least give her some tissues."

Ouch.

I slowly stood up from class. This little argument of ours had become the gossip of the week, and everyone looked at me with fear. I can imagine the headlines: "Kyon made Haruhi cry." And I even imagined my photo on the newspaper: "Badass of the year." Great, as if having to deal with closed spaces, time warps and giant crickets wasn't enough: Now I had to deal with the greatest evil of all: Society.

The sky was getting dark. VERY dark. Where did all those storm clouds come from? You can guess where.  
And as if the skies wanted to tell me something, it began to rain like crazy just after I got out of school. In 2.5 seconds, I was all wet.  
"Nice storms brewing, don't you think?" said Koizumi, who approached me from behind with an umbrella. "It was a very risky decision the one you took."  
"She's just so hard-headed sometimes, and I'm sorry, but she just crossed the line. I just couldn't keep myself silent after seeing Nagato suffer like this. I'm sorry... I just couldn't."  
"So the discussion was about Nagato-san, eh? Well, thanks to your little brawl, several closed spaces have been appearing since lunch", he said, not smiling at all. "And they're not ordinary closed spaces. The organization is very confused about it. Wanna look?"

As soon as I entered the closed space with Koizumi, I realized the magnitude of my actions.  
"Holy shit. What have I done?"

(End of chapter 3)


	4. The guilt trip of Suzumiya Haruhi

**Chapter 4. The guilt trip of Suzumiya Haruhi.**

"So the discussion was about Nagato-san, eh? Well, thanks to your little brawl, several closed spaces have been appearing since lunch", he said, not smiling at all. "And they're not ordinary closed spaces. The organization is very confused about it. Wanna look?"

As soon as I entered the closed space with Koizumi, I realized the magnitude of my actions.

Remember the closed spaces I entered when I was with Koizumi? The sky was a completely grey vault. And everything was dark. In today's closed space, however, there was actually a sky. And it wasn't a normal sky. It was filled with storm clouds. The stormclouds formed a spiral that resembled a hurricane seen from a satellite picture. There was lightning, hitting the buildings and random parts of the ground every 30 seconds. And there was rain, and wind, too. I had to cover myself, so I hid behind a building's wall.

But that wasn't all. The buildings flashed every time they got hit by the lightning, and got covered by some kind of dark blue force field.

"Holy shit. What have I done?"  
"Impressive, don't you think?"  
"So where's the celestial?"  
"They should appear in a couple of minutes."  
"They? What do you mean they?"  
"You'll see."

When all of the buildings and constructions had turned dark blue, The wind and rain stopped, and the water began accumulating at a spot, becoming brighter and brighter until it formed a celestial. And then, the celestial split in two. One looked humanoid, with two arms and two legs, while the other only had two legs, as if its arms had been cut off.

"The battle is about to begin. Cover your ears."  
"What?"

SCREEEEEEEEEEEECH!!!!!!!!

I had heard the celestials roar earlier. But i never heard them scream with such force. I'll name the two celestials so you don't get confused about them. I'll call the armless one "Screamer", and the other "Basher".

Screamer's shout turned into a sonic wave which hurt Basher, throwing it down to the ground and making it bleed its glowing cyan plasma. And as if they were playing some turn-based RPG, Screamer waited for Basher's turn. Basher threw a blow towards Screamer's face, making it impact against one of the buildings.

"They're... fighting each other?"  
"Exactly. This is the first time we witnessed something like this. Can you see now why the Organization is so confused about -"  
Both of us anticipated the next screech and covered our ears as hard as we could.

It was a cycle that both terrified me and shocked my entire being. The buildings did not get damaged at all, but their protective fields got cracked.

The battle was brief. It lasted less than a minute. Finally, Screamer made a final attack and made Basher explode.

"So, the guilt won this battle", said Koizumi. "Hold this", he said, giving me his umbrella. His body got covered with his esper giant red sphere, and proceeded to fly to destroy 'Screamer'. All that was needed to defeat him was to cut off his head, which contained the mouth. After that, the body turned into common water.

When 'Screamer', or should I say 'Guilt', disappeared, Koizumi flew back towards me.  
"Look up", said Koizumi smiling.  
I looked up, and the storm was gone... and there were just white clouds... and a blue sky?

We felt a gentle breeze blowing upon us. It was so refreshing it was hard to believe. Truly, this was no ordinary closed space.  
"Sit down, we still have time", said Koizumi.  
I sat down, noticing that the building had no water on it. That was good, because I didn't want to get my butt soaked and become the joke of the day to nearby people.  
"Another reason why the Organization is confused, is that the closed space did not expand with time. Some believe the reason is that Suzumiya-san's current conflict is not with the world, but with herself. A third reason to get confused is the time."  
"The time?"  
"Didn't you notice something different about the Closed Space right now?"  
"Other than the sky? I don't understand."  
"The closed space is taking longer to disappear."  
"Oh, you're right... wait! What if it doesn't disappear? Is this the End of the World?" I asked, worried.  
"Don't worry, it's not. Without Celestials, all closed spaces will disappear eventually - no exception. This is a knowledge that was also infused to us by Suzumiya-san, it's part of the rules. The question is how long it takes for the closed spaces to vanish. Today's closed spaces take from 3 to 10 minutes to go away."

"Well, what do you think?" asked Koizumi.  
I was speechless, but at the same time, it didn't surprise me.  
"Frankly... I don't know what to say".

"The knowledge we just acquired is that those two celestials represent the inner conflict of Suzumiya Haruhi. It's a battle between guilt and anger. Normally, guilt and anger are a necessary part of the human psyche, but when they get out of control, bad things happen."  
"So", I asked, "Guilt was represented with the screaming Celestial?"  
"Yes, but this is the first time that we've had to deal with Suzumiya-san's guilt in person. And as usual, we represent her common sense."  
"I see...", I said. This time I felt guilty too. I began to think that those screeches that nearly turned me into a deaf man, were the cries of pain inside Haruhi's mind. I began to feel sorry for her.  
"The Organization's confusion is that they don't know whether this change in the closed spaces is for better or for worse. Personally, I believe it's for the better."  
"Why?"  
"The barriers around the buildings can mean that Suzumiya-san has realized that her actions and attitudes have real consequences in the world. This time there was nobody to blame but her. Because we have never seen the screaming celestial, the logical conclusion is that today was the first time Suzumiya-san has experienced true guilt. And, as it being the first time, it really became a shocking experience for her."

With those words, the one in conflict now was me. I had to tell Haruhi about how her stupid jealousy hurt Nagato, but at the same time, I wished there was some other way to teach her.

"So the buildings are protected not once, with the closed space, but twice with the light barriers. Also, the sky above us began looking more normal - meaning that Suzumiya-san's desire for the supernatural has disminished... for now. However, she can't be guilty for every single problem in the world, and that's what we needed to tell her this time."  
I nodded while Koizumi continued talking.  
"After watching today's closed spaces, I formulated another theory about your encounters with Suzumiya Haruhi. But perhaps we should do this in the restaurant. After all, we can't be talking idly sitting under the rain."  
"What rain?"  
Koizumi pointed up. Red cracks began to appear on the sky vault. Instinctively, I stood up.  
"Umbrella, please?"  
I gave the umbrella to Koizumi. He opened it just before the rain in the normal world began falling on our heads.

"Let's get to eat", said Koizumi. "Your treat?"  
"My treat."

We ordered our food, and began eating in intervals. As if we were both of the Celestials taking turns to fight, we took turns to eat and talk.  
"So... what's your theory?" I asked. As you should know by now, Koizumi isn't the type of person that gets straight to the point. He uses the most unusual metaphors to explain his ideas.  
"Have you ever watched superhero cartoons or TV shows?"  
"When I was a little boy, yes, some."  
"In many of those cartoons, there is ALWAYS one episode where, thanks to a magic device used by the villains, or for some supernatural reason, the most powerful member of the team gets turned into a small child but without losing his superpowers, and the whole team has to prevent the child from destroying the heroes' headquarters, the city, or the whole world. Or maybe they needed to take care of a giant baby. This is what I call the 'superbaby situation'."

Somebody kill me now. Koizumi, I've heard plenty of weird comparisons from you, using literature, movies, ancient folklore, but this time you take the cake for using the most possibly obscure comparison of the year. Congratulations.

"Did you have to use such an obscure comparison? And thank you for remind me of the most annoying episodes in superheroes TV shows, I hated them."

Koizumi showed again his toothpaste commercial smile, and shrugged. "Well, at least you know what I'm talking about. My theory is that Suzumiya Haruhi wants to achieve happiness, but is currently unable to do so for some unknown reason. So, she unconsciously summoned us to teach her the lessons of life. In this case, she is the 'superbaby', and we're the superheroes who were summoned to take care of her and train her in 'the ways of the human world'. Without our superpowers, she would continue to be a spoiled brat until she dies, or until the world gets destroyed - whatever happens first."

I nodded as I continued eating my food, letting Koizumi keep talking.

"All of our adventures have taught Suzumiya-san a lesson. The mystery mansion taught her the value of human life. Our encounter with the dog-infecting life forms taught her to care for animals and nature. And today, you and Nagato-san have taught her how guilt is necessary to care for others."

Koizumi finished his explanation. "And perhaps that's the reason why she chose you in the first place. Because she needs your down-to-earth philosophy to neutralize her magical thinking. That's your 'superpower', after all. But you can't do it alone, this is why we were summoned to help her, too."

"So you mean the reason she chose me was not that she liked me, but because she needed my reasoning?"  
"It's very probable."  
I sighed. "I like that idea much better. I really hope I'm just a mentor for her because I have absolutely no intentions of marrying her."  
"Adam and Eve, huh?"  
"Don't even remind me that", I said, before finishing my meal. "One kiss was more than enough for me."  
"Look..." said Koizumi. "It has stopped raining. Perhaps Suzumiya-san stopped crying and is exhausted right now. Maybe you should cheer her up with a visit."  
"You're right. I'll call her right away."

I paid for the meal, and proceeded to call Haruhi. But as soon as I grabbed my cellphone, it began ringing. It was Nagato's number.

"Hello? Nagato?"  
"Kyon-kun!" It was Asahina-san's voice. Her voice sounded calm, but sad at the same time.  
"Asahina-san, how's Nagato?"  
"She's feeling better..."  
Thank God.  
"... but she hasn't recovered yet. She asked me to stay at her appartment tonight, so I'm going for my clothes."  
"Okay."  
"Oh - she wants to talk to you on the phone. Don't hang up, I have an important message for you."  
"Okay. Put her on the phone."

"Hello."

One word. What does a word mean to you? To ordinary people, it would just be a tiny sequence of letters. But for me, it acquired a new meaning. It was the first time that Nagato spoke on her own by the phone. Normally, when she called or I called she would just keep in silence to wait for my answer. But she said "hello", on her own. It took me completely by surprise.  
"Nagato? How are you feeling? Are you OK?"  
"Better... Asahina Mikuru has given me information with a great potential to stabilize my system."  
Information? What kind of information? Was it perhaps some data from the future Nagato? Whatever the reason, I felt glad.  
"Nagato, that's great news!"  
"Yes. However, more information is needed."  
"Oh, I'm so glad for you, Nagato!" I wiped my eyes as they got wet. Nagato, hearing you talk normally like you always do is like music to my ears.  
"Also... I want to apologize for worrying you. I feel... so sorry."  
"No need to feel sorry, Nagato. I understand. Just knowing that you're feeling better is my comfort."

"..."

Nagato paused for a moment. Was she trying to tell me something else?

"Kyon."  
"Yes?"  
"I..."  
"Yes?"

I heard Asahina-san whisper to Nagato. "Come on... you can say it."  
"I... I love you."

I heard Asahina-san talk again, this time louder. "Nagato-san... you said it!"

Nagato repeated the phrase with even more volume.  
"... I LOVE YOU."

"..." This time, I was the speechless one. I just didn't know how to answer to that. I tried to say something, but I just couldn't. And while I was still trying to decide what to say, Nagato spoke again. Hey, was it just me or it sounded like her voice was a tiny bit stressed?

"Please don't let her know. I'm still scared."  
"Don't worry, Nagato. I'm working on it. And I think I made a huge progress with that."

"..."

"Um, Nagato... I'm sorry, perhaps I shouldn't have, but... I said some things to Haruhi about you - DON'T WORRY, I DID NOT TELL HER about your feelings for me. I..."  
Boy, now I was nervous. I was more nervous about saying something wrong to Nagato than to Haruhi. Has the world turned upside down?  
"I just told her that you had a nervous breakdown, and that her dream was a guilt buildup about taking over the Literature Club. Don't worry, the world hasn't ended yet. So I'm going to talk to her and calm things down."

"..."

"Nagato?"  
"You scared me."  
"I'm... sorry."  
"It's ok... I LOVE YOU... PLEASE BE CAREFUL."  
"I will, Nagato. Don't worry."

"..."

Asahina-san spoke again.  
"Hello? Kyon-kun?"  
"Yes, Asahina-san?"  
"I got an important message from my superior. Please take Suzumiya-san to the appointment this afternoon. Tell her that Nagato-san is feeling better, and that her therapist needs to talk to both of you, at the usual place."  
"OK, I will. Wait, what therapist?"  
"Classified information."  
Ah, ha. That would be Asahina-san (big), which we'll call Asahina-sensei for now.  
"Okay. Thank you for the message."  
"Wait! I'm not finished, Kyon-kun!"  
"Yes?"  
"This is very important. You must NOT allow Suzumiya-san to tell you or anyone else about what happened four years ago. You must not allow her to!"  
Haruhi was going to tell me about John Smith? That's right! Of course she must not tell me! If she tells me, how am I supposed to tell her that I'm John Smith! She wouldn't believe me because I wouldn't have any more secrets to convince her of that. It's as if I had published the password for my e-mail address. Anyone could break in and pretend it was me. How would I prove that I was the real one?

Why didn't I think of this earlier?

"You're so right, Asahina-san! Thanks for the advice. Anything else?"  
"No, that's it. Take care, Kyon-kun."  
"See ya."

I sighed. Koizumi and I got out of the restaurant and sat down on a bench outside it. You know? I felt that I needed to smoke a cigarette. This has been the most exhausting day of my life. I just want to go home and get this over with.

"Well, how did it go?"  
"Nagato's feeling much better..."  
Should I tell him what she told me? No, it was too intimate, and I still needed to be careful. Koizumi has been a great help and has already vowed to help us if the organization is against us, but I still felt that I shouldn't tell him. Don't ask me why, I don't have to justify my decisions.  
"but I still need to talk to Haruhi. Thanks for the talk, Koizumi."  
"See you tomorrow."

I looked at my watch. I had plenty of time to pick up my bike at the bike parking zone, change my clothes, phone Haruhi and walk to the park. Even if I was slow I would still arrive on time to the designated place. But I don't want to take any chances. I better phone Haruhi first.

Her answering machine picked up. "This is Suzumiya Haruhi's phone. If you're an Esper, Alien, Time Traveler, Slider, or have an important message to leave, speak. If not, SHUT UP AND GET THE HELL OUT! Beeep."  
"Haruhi... it's Kyon. I'm sorry for today... and... it's not all your fault, you didn't know. Anyway, Nagato is feeling better now. Her therapist called me and told me she needed to talk to both of us. She will be waiting for us in the park, near East junior high."  
I heard a click.  
"Kyon?"  
"Haruhi?"  
"Is Yuki fine? Are you sure?"  
"Well, she's not entirely fine... but she's feeling better."  
"I'm so glad..."  
Haruhi, is your voice breaking up? I heard a sniff. Oh, Haruhi, I understand how you feel and I'm so sorry, but now's not the time to cry, we have a mission to accomplish right now!  
"Anyway, Haruhi, we have an appointment with Nagato's therapist, today at 6PM. In the Sakura park, near your junior high school."  
"Near my old junior high. Got it. "

After I took a quick shower and changed my clothes, I realized that I was about to witness a historical event. Haruhi would meet the adult Asahina-san which came from the future! Asahina-san, are you out of your mind? She will recognize you! Oh well, maybe you'll come up with something, after all, you're Asahina-sensei. But... Nagato's therapist? I began to wonder what sort of elaborate lie would Asahina-sensei tell Haruhi. Indeed, I got really curious about what she was up to.

I finished getting dressed when my cellphone rang.  
"KYON! IT'S GETTING LATE! meet me at East Junior High right now!"  
"Alright, I'm coming!"

As I climbed the long street to East Junior High, I arrived to the top of the hill. I remembered my time travelling adventures with Asahina-san (both small and big versions)... what I had told Haruhi, the mysterious signs that Haruhi commanded me to draw on the soccer field with the chalk machine... my second encounter with Asahina-san (big) after Nagato changed the world... could Tanabata 4 years ago have some kind of cosmic significance?

There she was, waiting for me.  
"YOU'RE LATE! YOU'LL PAY FOR TOMORROW'S MEAL!"  
"I get it, I get it! And why did we have to meet up at this place, anyway?"  
"Just because. Any objections?"

Ah, Haruhi... seeing you as energetic as always made me feel so comfortable. I felt that the world was slowly getting stabilized again. Or maybe it wasn't "the" world that was becoming stable, but "my" world? Maybe I didn't care that much about the fate of the universe and what I really wanted was that Haruhi could be happy like a normal person. Whatever the answer to that question is, I'm glad you're better now, Haruhi, but I really wish it hadn't been like this.

"What are you looking at?"  
"Nothing, nothing!"  
"Kyon... you look suspicious today..."  
"Suspicious? What do you mean?"  
"Nothing."

Sigh. As we were slowly walking down the path, I really wondered if Haruhi was truly responsible for Nagato's crisis. It's not her fault that she possesses god-like powers, is it? Koizumi was right... she was, after all, a super-baby. But how to raise her? How to make her grow up and realize that even if the world revolves around her, it SHOULDN'T? As I was asking all those questions to myself, Haruhi stopped when she saw the soccer field on that junior high school.

She rested her hands on the fence, and contemplated the people playing on the field that had witnessed her intergalactic message to Altair and Vega. She really looked like when I first had met her. Looking at the window, complaining about her misery with sighs and a bored look... Haruhi... what is that you're missing? Are you still expecting aliens, espers, sliders, and time travelers? Are you missing Mr. John Smith? Was that the reason why you chose me and Asahina-san to join the SOS brigade? Because we remind you of John Smith and his little "narcoleptic sister"? Do you miss them so much that you wanted a replacement John Smith and sister to make you company?

Do you feel lonely, Haruhi? Is that it?

Haruhi sighed as if she gave a positive answer to my mental question. "Ahh... this brings back memories..."  
"Uh huh."  
"Hey - don't tell me you studied here, how else would you be having memories about here?"  
"Sorry, I just felt I should support you with your sighs."  
"Idiot". Normally, when Haruhi tells me that, she just turns around and remembers doing what she was doing. Walking, running, searching for mysteries, but this time she didn't move. She just kept looking at that soccer field. She took a deep breath, and without turning around, she began speaking.  
"Kyon... there's something important that I want to tell you... it's the reason why I chose you to be the first member of the SOS brigade."  
Wait, I remembered I had to do something right now. What was it?  
John Smith. Oh crap. If Haruhi mentions that name, the trump card to save the universe will vanish. I need to stop her from saying anything else.

"Kyon... four years ago, this was the school where I drew a message to the stars."  
"Yes, I know. Taniguchi told me about it. You don't need to mention it."  
Haruhi turned around aggressively. "Will you just shut up and listen to what I have to say? If you don't have time to listen to others, you'll never get yourself a girlfriend! Now listen. Four years ago, in Tanabata, I was here when I met a man -"

I covered her mouth with my hand. "NO, HARUHI. I DON'T WANT TO KNOW."  
She began getting angry and sad, and upset at the same time. Before anything else, I began speaking.  
"Haruhi... listen to me. I know you're feeling guilty for Nagato, but that doesn't mean you have to tell me about the MOST IMPORTANT SECRET OF YOUR LIFE. There are some things that you need to keep to yourself, and yourself only. Do you understand?"

"But... I really want to share this with you!"  
"Then let's share it, but as a treasured secret. If you reveal the secret, there will be no treasure to keep, and it'll just become an empty memory. Do you want that to happen, Haruhi?"

Haruhi slowly looked down. "You're right... it's just that... today I realized that I really didn't know much about you, and I thought that, perhaps, if I shared my most important memory with you..."  
"I understand, Haruhi. But... you said you met a man there, right? Well, have you thought how this very important man in your life would feel if you shared his secret? Anyway, don't you remember why we met today in the first place? Nagato needs our help."

Haruhi sighed, and her expression changed flavor from melancholy to determination. She looked at me in the eyes, and said:

"You're right. Let's help Yuki."  
We continued our path towards the park, and Haruhi asked me.  
"Kyon... does Yuki hate me?"  
"No, she doesn't", I said, resting my hand on her shoulder for a moment. "She wants to trust you and be your friend, there's just some issues that you both need to resolve. Some on your own, and some together."  
"I tried to get some sleep after school, but I couldn't stop remembering that nightmare. I wondered if Yuki had the same nightmare that I had... or if she's had worse nightmares. What is going on insider her? And why is it that you know her much better than I do? I feel... I feel like I've failed at being a good commander."

I knew that wasn't true. Haruhi, you may be the most annoying person on Earth, but you have never failed us as the SOS brigade commander.  
"No, Haruhi. You did not fail."  
"But you said it, Yuki had a crisis because of me... and if she ever... if she ever..."  
Her voice began to break down again. Oh, Haruhi, don't tell me that you're going to cry again.  
"Haruhi, Nagato's still alive, and well. Maybe you two just need to open up yourselves to each other. I don't know..."

Somehow, I felt like if I was fighting an uphill battle. Nothing I said to her would make her understand.  
"But..."

As I looked at her melancholic face, I remembered the celestial battle between Anger and Guilt. But enough was enough.  
"Haruhi. Please forgive me for what I'm about to do." I really hope this doesn't make her feel worse. I smacked her as fast as I could, but I moderated my strength.  
"GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF, WILL YA? DID YOU COME HERE TO HELP NAGATO OR JUST TO COMPLAIN ABOUT HOW EVIL AND WRETCHED YOU ARE? I've had enough of your complaints for today. Let's go meet Asahina-san."

I grabbed her by her hand, and began running towards the meeting place.  
"Kyon, wait - you didn't tell me Mikuru-chan would be here!"

Oh... shit. I was thinking of Asahina-san (big), but I ended up talking about the young Asahina-san! Quick, Kyon, make something up!  
"Well... I don't know if she will show up, but she was the one who passed me the message. I just assummed that she would."  
Haruhi caught up with me and now it was her who was dragging me in the race, and we finally arrived.

"We're here", I said. "And we still have 10 minutes left."  
"Is this were we're supposed... gasp... to meet?"  
"gasp... Yes... gasp..."

"Kyon", said Haruhi, after recovering her breath. "Thank you for making me come to my senses." And smiling with a thousand watt smile, she patted me on the shoulder. "If you keep supporting the brigade members like this, you'll earn a promotion!"  
I chuckled.  
"What are you laughing at? Do you know how hard a promotion is?"  
"Nothing, nothing." I paused for two seconds. "Haruhi..."  
"Yes?"  
"Welcome back."  
Haruhi smiled again. Oh, how I loved that smile.

After a minute, we heard a voice coming from behind.

"Haruhi-chan? Kyon-kun?"  
We turned around. It was her, alright! And she was wearing the perfect disguise. A briefcase, formal work pants, a ponytail, glasses (small glasses, not big), and she was wearing a white robe like the ones doctors use. It was then that I understood why she had signed with the name "A. Sensei." The sensei suffix is used to designate not only teachers, but doctors, too! Asahina-sensei, you're a genius.

Haruhi looked at Asahina-sensei like if she had seen a ghost.  
"M... Mikuru chan?" she said in a low voice.  
Asahina sensei smiled. "Wrong. It's Miyuki. Asahina Miyuki-sensei. Nice to meet you."

(End of chapter 4)


	5. The revelations of Asahina Miyuki

**Chapter 5. The revelations of Asahina Miyuki.**

Haruhi looked at Asahina-sensei as if she had seen a ghost.  
"M... Mikuru chan?" she said in a low voice.  
Asahina sensei smiled. "Wrong. It's Miyuki. Asahina Miyuki-sensei. Nice to meet you."  
"Uh... nice to meet you..."  
"Is it OK with you if you just call me 'sensei?'"  
"No problem", answered Haruhi.

"Please, take a seat." said Sensei.

I was as speechless as Haruhi. Asahina-sensei, what are you going to tell Haruhi?

"First of all, I need to ask you a favor. Please don't tell my sister that I was here. If she finds out that I'm still alive..."

Still alive? Wait a second - Asahina-san had an older sister that died? What was it, an accident? Murder? Conspiracies? Asahina-sensei, what are you doing? Haruhi's had enough problems for today to have to deal with evil thoughts like this!

"... oh dear, how do I start?"  
Asahina-sensei smiled. "Ah, I know. Haruhi-chan, Kyon-kun, what I'm about to say is strictly confidential, and let's say... bad things would happen if someone else finds out.

Asahina-sensei handed Haruhi and me two tablets with a contract on each one, that read "Non-disclosure agreement", and they had a holographic seal of the government of Japan?!?!

I don't know what was scarier. The fact that Asahina-sensei invented some kind of conspiracy theory, or that Haruhi actually believed it. The easiest possible solution was that this was a prank made up by Asahina-san's sister. But I guess the doctor attire and the government papers, and the non-disclosure agreement served their purpose. By the way, nice hologram. Is it real?

Haruhi was petrified. She read the paper one, two, three times, and I think she was trying to believe what her eyes saw. She looked exactly how she had looked the day we found Keiichi-san "dead" on that remote island. Haruhi found something she wasn't searching for. I signed my paper and gave the pen to Haruhi. The small contact between the pen and her skin brought her back to reality, and she quickly signed.

"Thank you."  
Ah, Asahina-sensei, that smile of you looks even prettier with that ponytail - hold your horses, Kyon, get your mind out of the gutter!

After the suspense, Asahina-sensei broke the silence.

"Haruhi-chan, have you read about public key cryptography?"  
"Cryptography? Uh..."  
Wait a minute. What does cryptography have to deal with Nagato? I thought you were her therapist and this would be more psychobabble. Just what is going on here?  
"Secret messages? Encryption, internet security, does that give you a hint?"  
"I uh eh..."

Asahina-san made a hand gesture calling Haruhi's attention. "Earth to Haruhi, Earth to Haruhi, do you read me, Haruhi?"  
"Eh? Oh, sorry! It's just that this government business caught me off guard..."  
Asahina-sensei chuckled. "It's understandable. Kyon-kun almost threw up the first time I met him and told him about me. So, Haruhi-chan, have you thought about the answer?"  
"Uh, what was the question?"  
"Public key cryptography."  
"Hmmm let me see... I remember. It was about prime numbers."  
"That's right. If you have two prime numbers, N1, and N2, by multiplying them you obtain a bigger number. If someone, let's say, Alice, wants to send a message to Bob, the only thing Bob needs to give Alice is the multiplied number N1*N2 = M, to encrypt her message. Bob can decrypt the message because he knows what N1 and N2 are."

Wait a minute... prime numbers, multiplying, what? I'm not very good at math, someone explain this to me.  
"You seem confused, Kyon-kun. But I'll let Haruhi explain to you later. Or... you could look it up in Google."  
Haruhi stared at me with an annoyed look. What? I'm still studying in High school, how was I supposed to know that?  
"Anyway, if Alice wanted to obtain N1 and N2 from M to decrypt a message sent to Bob, she would need to run a supercomputer for years trying to guess what N1 and N2 are. So that's the basis for public key cryptography."  
Haruhi nodded quickly, while I was just following her. Asahina-sensei continued with her speech.  
"Do you know what would happen if somehow, this powerful encryption could be broken with a super-incredible computer?"  
"Yes..." said Haruhi, holding her chin. "It would mean... that, all the internet would..."  
Asahina-sensei finished explaining. "Nothing would be secure anymore. Private conversations, financial transactions, intelligence secrets, confidential documents, nothing would be safe. Nothing. Now, you must be wondering what this has to do with Nagato-san, right?"

Nagato-san. Finally, we're talking about something that we both know. And I'm glad, because all this security and encryption conversation was getting me more dizzy than one of your time travels, Asahina-san. I mean, Sensei.

"Yes", said Haruhi. "What does this have to do with her?"  
"Nagato-san is a person with extraordinary capabilities. She was even called a Super-hacker once."  
Super-hacker. I remembered how Nagato was having fun with our space battle against the Computer Research Society. Haruhi, you heard that phrase, too.  
"But that's not all. The problem lies not only in her intelligence. Here, this is what I wanted you to see."

Asahina-sensei opened her briefcase again and gave us a folder entitled "TOP-SECRET". Inside there was the profile of Nagato-san: Parents, childhood life, known friends, psychological profile, and a huge bunch of complete and total bullshit.

Marked in yellow, there was the "Special abilities" section. They read "Savant. Instant factorization of very large numbers, up to and above 32kbits."

Haruhi was reading that, while Asahina-sensei took off her ponytail, and sighed.  
"Oh my God..." said Haruhi, shocked. "Does this mean..."  
"The future of mankind relies on keeping Nagato-san's secret safe. I belong to a worldwide anonymous organization dedicated to protect people with extraordinary abilities, like Nagato-san."  
"I see..."

"Mind giving me this back?"  
Haruhi nodded twice. "Yes, here it is."  
"Alright." She took a metal small can out of her briefcase, and folded Nagato's profile in zigzag. First vertically, then horizontally. She put the little origami inside the can, and burnt it with a match.

"Also, that's the reason why I need you to keep my secret from my sister, Haruhi-chan."  
Asahina-sensei took off her glasses and grabbed Haruhi's hands. Looking at her right in the eyes, she said: "So, please understand me. No matter how lonely I feel, I just can't jeopardize the whole world just because of my own personal feelings."

AH HAH! That's your whole plan, isn't it? Now that you took off your glasses and ponytail, you just looked like an older version of Asahina-san. And by saying that phrase, you'll make Haruhi remember it every single time she looks at Asahina-san's face. "I just can't jeopardize the whole world just because of my own personal feelings." Asahina-san, you're a genius.

"I... I understand.", said Haruhi.  
"But I have to say I was quite surprised to see you put Koizumi-kun, Nagato-san, my sister and Kyon-kun in the same club. When I found out, I couldn't sleep all night! This couldn't be just a coincidence! All of you... together! I don't know how you did it, Haruhi-chan. I guess you're the most mysterious of all five."

My face became as white as a snowman. Asahina-san! You're giving her too much information! Are you crazy?

"All... five? Mys...terious? Wait, what do you mean?"  
"Oh, I shouldn't have told you that. Well, let's just say... that a very interesting future awaits you. But that's not the reason you came here, right? You came here to talk about Nagato-san's emotional problems."

Haruhi looked down and frowned. She remembered what we came here for.  
"Is it... true? Did she have a nervous breakdown?"  
"Haruhi-chan... what I'm going to tell you will scare you a lot, but you need to be strong. Promise me. Don't let your sanity get ruined by your feelings... be them jealousy, fear, anger... or guilt. You need to learn to balance your own emotions, not get swayed by them. Promise? Will you be strong for Nagato-san?"  
Haruhi nodded. "Yes."  
"So... are you ready? Promise me you won't panic, and you'll take it easy."  
Haruhi looked determined, but at the same time scared. She took a deep breath. "Okay.. I'm ready."  
"Do you know what a savant is?"  
"No..."  
"Well, the savant syndrome is a very rare medical condition where a child develops one or more areas of expertise, ability or brilliance. It is only present in autistic children."  
"Autistic? You mean -"  
"Yes... Nagato-san suffers from a very rare form of autism. Apparently, she is unable to express her feelings. What is strange about that, is that her autism has not isolated her from the outside world like in other cases of autism. In fact, we don't even know if it's really autism. We have done numerous tests on her, and this is the greatest mystery of all: Her brain scans look exactly like a normal human being. We can't understand the cause of her incredible numerical ability. And we can't understand either why is it that she shows absolutely no emotions, whether she's happy, sad, or in panic. Who knows? Maybe she can control consciously her facial expressions so well that she has never learned to smile sincerely... or maybe she's just too scared of opening up to others. It is a mystery."

Haruhi nodded, wanting to learn more. And to be honest, I was excited. This lie was so well-elaborated that I wanted to see more.

"But that's not the worst of her problems. It's her dreams. From what we have seen, Nagato-san's dreams are so vivid that when she dreams she actually experiences physical pleasure, or pain. When she was a child, she would often throw up whenever she had a nightmare, and would run away from people because she dreamed that they hurt her and believed they actually did."

"That... can't be possible..." said Haruhi, shaking her head in denial.

"Today's morning, Nagato-san called me by phone saying she had a nightmare. In this nightmare, she was running away from a monster who wanted to eat her favorite book."

As Asahina-sensei was giving details about Nagato's dream, Haruhi became more and more scared.  
"That... can't be true... that's ... it can't be true! It can't!"  
"Haruhi-chan, what did you just promise me a minute ago? Haruhi-chan? HARUHI-CHAN!!!"

"Yes?" said Haruhi, shocked. And to be honest, I was shocked too! I had never seen Asahina-san become so upset! It even gave me the shivers.

"What did you just promise me a minute ago!" shouted Asahina-san. After the brief scare I had, I really enjoyed that moment: Watching Haruhi become submissive and obedient. This was worth a bowl of popcorn.

"Uh... that I would be strong... and shouldn't let my feelings..."  
"Yes. Haruhi-chan, remember, you need to be strong and take things with calm. Because what I'm going to tell you may turn your world upside down."  
Haruhi swallowed.  
"Breathe deeply... in... out..."  
Asahina-sensei calmed Haruhi with some words and basic relaxation techniques. I was awestruck. Who would say that the timid, vulnerable Asahina-san would become someone so bold and with so much confidence that could both stir up Haruhi and then calm her down?

"Feeling better now?"  
"Yes. Sorry."  
"Good. Haruhi-chan, it's impossible to prove, but we believe that you have abilities that would go beyond of what any human being could have."  
"A...bilities? Wh... what do you mean?"  
"Well, if what you said is true, then you have the ability to see other people's dreams. And that may just be the tip of the iceberg. But we can't be sure."  
Haruhi didn't know what to say. And I didn't either. Weren't we talking about Nagato? Nagato, Haruhi, Nagato... Asahina-san, you're getting me dizzy again!  
"My point is, Haruhi-chan... that for Nagato-san's sake, you need to be very careful. Especially when you're having a dream. You wouldn't like people intruding YOUR dreams, would you?"  
"No! Of course not!"  
"It's the same for Nagato-san. "  
Haruhi was shaking her head, and she was trembling like an old building in the middle of an earthquake. "I... I... I don't know what to say..."  
"Haruhi-chan... let's calm down again. Close your eyes, breathe deeply... smell the Sakura flowers, look at the river..."

Another session of relaxation.

"It's... very difficult for me... suddenly I'm an Esper!? And I saw Yuki's dream? How was I supposed to know! Nobody ever told me I could do these things!"  
"Well, I'm telling you now. So, Haruhi-chan... what do you think about Nagato-san's dream?"  
"It... it was horrible. Am I... really... a monster to her? Please, tell me the truth!"

"It wasn't your fault, Haruhi-chan." Asahina-sensei was holding Haruhi's hands, and caressed them with her thumbs. "When she first met you, she told us everything about it, and she had a lot of fun with you. You have really helped her. Much more than you think."  
"But then..." said Haruhi. I noticed her voice was beginning to break. "Why? Why is she so scared of me?"  
"Something happened that none of us could ever predict. She began to... develop an emotional dependency for Kyon-kun."  
"Kyon?"  
"We could say that she fell in love with him, but we still can't be sure. We just know that she got scared of you finding out."  
"But why? Why would she be scared of that? He's not my boyfriend!"  
"Perhaps you can understand with a clearer example..."

Asahina-sensei took a piece of chalk from her briefcase. "Imagine this is Nagato-san's heart. All lonely, without friends, she sought refuge in her books. Later, she meets you, Kyon-kun, and opens up a bit to him. He was the first guy she met that was her age, after all. So, they become closer, she starts telling him more about herself - something she had never done before with any other boy - or any other human being for that matter. She dreams once that they kiss... and she is becoming happier... but one day, she looks at you getting jealous of Mikuru-chan. She looks at your face, all angry... she gets scared... and then she starts having nightmares... so, she distances herself from Kyon-kun, feeling more lonely every day..."

"And there she was, battling between fear, and love... and without a way to vent out her emotions, they became stronger, and stronger, until..."

SNAP.

The piece of chalk broke. I felt as if my own heart broke with that snap. I couldn't think of phrases to say, many thoughts entered my head: Guilt. Pain. Loneliness. Stop it. SHUT UP! IT'S TOO MUCH ALREADY!

Asahina-sensei gave a kiss to the chalk as if she were kissing Nagato herself, and carefully put it in her robe before going on.  
"Perhaps that's the reason she never had any friends, and the reason she never showed any facial expressions. Maybe she was too scared. Maybe, by isolating herself and hiding her emotions, she wouldn't get hurt in her nightmares. Frankly, we don't know. We have tried to ask her, but she has always kept it to herself. I think this is why she's been feeling so... lonely."

It was when Asahina-sensei mentioned the phrase "so lonely", that I watched the most moving experience I would ever imagine. Haruhi couldn't take it any more, and she began to actually cry. And the cry became a sob, and the sob became a series of screams. I remembered the screaming celestial from the closed space this afternoon.

Asahina-sensei hugged Haruhi while she let her recline her face on her soft chest. "It's Ok... you didn't know... you didn't know."

I instantly knew that I was not needed now. I carefully stood up and walked a few meters away, and sat down on a nearby chair.

Occasionally, I would look at them. Haruhi just wouldn't stop crying. And Asahina-sensei would tell her things like "It wasn't your fault", "You didn't know", "everything's OK now", "You don't have to feel lonely", and Haruhi said things like "felt so lonely", "can't accept it", "so scared", "anyone else", "don't want to lose him", "He reminds me so much of him..." , wait - was she confessing her love for me? This was not about Nagato-san, right? This was about Haruhi all the time.

Haruhi had all these emotions inside her that had been accumulated for years. And she was sharing them, all of them, to Asahina-sensei. I didn't know what they talked about, but they talked. A lot.

Some time later, perhaps an hour, Haruhi finally calmed down. I looked up, left, right... hey, the world hasn't ended! We're safe! Hallelujah!

I saw Asahina-sensei say more things to Haruhi, while Haruhi smiled and nodded. Asahina-sensei took a handkerchief and wiped Haruhi's face with it. She later caressed Haruhi's cheeks with her soft hand. It was a very tender scene. As I looked at Haruhi's face, I noticed that her expression was one I had never seen. She didn't look angry, upset, lonely, nor melancholic. She looked... peaceful.

Wow. They looked like such a happy family. I wondered if it could be allowed for Haruhi to travel back to the future and stay with Asahina-sensei. They just looked like mother and daughter. I was still thinking about this, when Haruhi shouted suddenly:

"YOU KNOW HIM!?!?!? PLEASE TELL ME WHERE HE IS! I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR HIM FOR YEARS!!"

What? More surprises? This talk had more plot twists than a bad american soap opera! What's going on?

Haruhi began talking like crazy, while Asahina-sensei tried to calm her down. They began to talk, and Haruhi paid a lot of attention to Asahina-sensei's explanation. Haruhi began smiling.

The lights in the park turned on. 8PM? Is it this late already?  
But Asahina-sensei kept talking to Haruhi, and Haruhi looked like a child hearing about the adventures of his favorite action hero. Then, I saw her laugh. Haruhi... you're laughing!

Asahina-sensei hugged Haruhi and kissed her forehead. Haruhi hugged her back. They said some things to each other briefly, and Asahina-sensei opened her briefcase again. She gave Haruhi a huge folder containing what looked like a lot of documents.

They both stood up, and Haruhi made a reverence to Asahina-sensei. Then, she ran towards me. She had a million watt - no, a BILLION watt smile on her face. She didn't say anything. She just looked at me while holding that folder like a child would hold her most precious teddy bear. She only stopped for a second. Then, she ran home, still smiling. Hey, are the Sakura trees looking brighter and sparkly?

Asahina-sensei stood up, and walked to me.  
Sigh! "Whew! Finally, I have lifted this weight from my shoulders."  
"Asahina-san, what exactly happened?"  
She smiled. And this was a million watt smile. I never thought I would see Asahina-san smile with such... radiance. Ah, I'm the most fortunate man in the world! I've seen two beauties emit an aura of happiness the same day! I can die in peace now!  
"Let's sit down, Kyon-kun."

Asahina-san told me then how she had been memorizing that little performance, chalk included, every single morning, for more than a year. She told me that she had told Haruhi that John Smith was working for the same organization that she was, and that she told her more about John Smith, giving personal details about his personality.

"Asahina-san, I was scared to death about all the things you were telling her! How did you know the world wouldn't end if you made a mistake? And who gave you that dialog to memorize?"  
"Suzumiya-san did. She will write in a paper everything about this conversation. Also, you know the world is moved by her will, right now. In her moments of loneliness, guilt and confusion, she wanted so much to learn the truth, that I just had to come here and tell her. This was a predetermined event, after all. Oh, those documents you saw her carrying... those were letters sent to her by John Smith."  
"Wait a minute, does this mean...?"  
"It's the safe way for her to learn the truth: At her own pace, in private, from someone she trusts. That folder contains other folders with specific instructions not to open them until certain dates."  
"But... who wrote those letters?"  
"You will, Kyon-kun. Starting with tonight. Here's your first set of instructions. Read them carefully."

As I read them, they told me I should ask Haruhi not to mention to ANYONE (including the SOS brigade members, and ESPECIALLY not to me), anything related to John Smith or her messages to the stars four years ago. I should also ask her to write everything that she saw and heard in this meeting, to the most insignificant detail. She would later meet Asahina-sensei tomorrow morning at this same place, and give the letter to her without speaking a word. To preserve the secret, she would tell Asahina-sensei that the letter was for me (Kyon). The reason for this was that Asahina-sensei was under surveillance and she wasn't allowed to talk about anything related to yesterday night. It was also possible that the second Asahina-sensei would be a younger double for Asahina-sensei which would deliver the message to the REAL Asahina-sensei.

Asahina-san, don't you think you're going too far with this conspiracy stuff? Anyway - the real reason for this was that the Asahina-sensei receiving Haruhi's letter would be a younger Asahina-sensei. The one from a year ago, to be precise. And she couldn't know what happened today because she wouldn't have received Haruhi's letter.

Ah, I understand now.

Let me explain again the order of events:

1. Today, Haruhi talks to Asahina-sensei and learns about herself, Nagato and John Smith.  
2. Today, at her home, Haruhi reads the first letter from John Smith, instructing her to write down Today's experiences, and most important, the dialog and interaction with Asahina-sensei.  
3. Tomorrow, The one-year-younger Asahina-sensei receives from Haruhi the letter with the dialog to begin memorizing it and rehearsing it until the specific day would come.  
4. Before returning back to her time, the one-year-younger Asahina-sensei contacts me and receives my first letter to Haruhi (the same letter that told her to write down her experiences).  
5. Back in the future, The younger Asahina-sensei gives Haruhi's letter and John Smith's letter for Haruhi to her superiors, and starts rehearsing the dialog.  
6. A year later in the future, Asahina-sensei has perfectly memorized her performance and is ready to talk to and comfort Haruhi. Obviously she will never tell Haruhi anything that would make her go crazy, because, after all, she did NOT go crazy.

In other words, this "predetermined event" depended on one thing: Haruhi writing down her dialog with Asahina-sensei. A dialog which would be guaranteed, by Haruhi's own wishes, NOT to destroy the world.

"Wow."  
"Do you think you can do it, Kyon-kun? I know you can."  
"I will."

"But, wait, with all the brigade activities, how am I going to find the time to write all those letters?"  
"How else? By asking John Smith to tell her. Read the second page of the instructions. And... have this."

Asahina-sensei gave me her brief case, while I read the instructions. Let's see.

As Haruhi reads each letter from John Smith, she will write a reply and seal it. Haruhi will keep her replies in a safe box, and will mark the envelopes with the date and time that she wrote them. Occasionally, she will be contacted by Asahina-sensei to give her the batch with all of her letters. Then, the younger Asahina-sensei will collect the batches and keep them in the future, in a safe vault with national security protection. And regularly, Asahina-sensei will send both me and Haruhi the batches containing our letters from the near future. My replies to Haruhi's letters will include her original letters, so that she knows that I actually read them, and also, that there was time travel involved in the exchange. She will realize this after my first reply.

The first batch of letters from Haruhi to me are in a metallic briefcase. Ah, this briefcase. OK, I got it.

"Okay, let me get this straight. In the future, you... collected all letters from Haruhi for John Smith, and also, you collected all my future letters from John for Haruhi. That's right?"  
"Right." she said, nodding.  
"So, every six months or so, you will ask me to give my replies to Haruhi's letters, and you will ask Haruhi-chan to give you her replies for me."  
"That's right", she said, nodding again.  
"Okay... so... practically, you're saying that you just gave us those collected batches of letters from now to six or so months in the future, right?"

"You got it all right, Kyon-kun! This way, only one exchange of letters is necessary to communicate between John Smith and Haruhi. Provided, that you don't read any letters in advance. So, with each letter that you write, each one of you creates a tiny little timequake, that only affects two people: John Smith, and Haruhi-chan."  
"Ah, so that's how it's going to work, eh? I'd like to see Haruhi opening the next letter and find the very same letter that she sent, along with my reply! Time travel post service, eh?"  
"Yes! By the way, as John Smith, and as the letter says, tell her in the first letter that she needs to watch the american film 'Frequency' (2000). It will help you understand this better, and it will prepare Haruhi-chan psychologically for the idea of inter-time-plane communication."

Asahina-sensei, your smile is an energy drink for my exhausted brains.

I sighed. "I don't know if I can sleep tonight", I said, smiling.

"Understand now? Everything's part of John Smith's instructions I just gave Haruhi-chan. After all, her receiving today those letters from Mr. Smith, was a predetermined event."  
"I see."  
"Oh. Kyon-kun. Just make sure that in the letters, you will treat Haruhi like your child, or like your little sister. Because she's already suspecting unconsciously that you're John Smith, it is of vital importance that she won't get jealous of you when she sees you making out with Nagato-san."  
"Okay, I will - WHAT?!?!?"  
"Eh? What did I say? Eh???? Oh no!! I shouldn't have... eh... uh..."

Ah, Asahina-san... you never change, but why did you have to talk about me making out with Nagato? My mind's going to explode...

Asahina-san shut up, and knocked her own head as a small punishement and smiled. "I did it again. Anyway, Kyon-kun, you did a wonderful job today. For now, the universe is safe again. And now, your prize. Close your eyes."

Wait a minute, Asahina-san - sensei... what are you doing? Kiss me? Why don't I feel fine about it! What about Nagato? Hey, is this a goodbye kiss?

I felt a soft touch on my cheeks as I heard a "tsk" coming from them. I was so relieved and so disappointed at the same time.

"Asahina-san..."  
"Sensei!" She knocked my head in the same cute way that she knocked herself a minute ago. "Asahina-sensei!" she reprimanded me, with a smile that could sweeten the most bitter of reprimands.

"Asahina-sensei... will I see you again?"

She paused for a second, and then answered.

"Classified information", she said, winking at me and smiling.

(End of chapter 5)


	6. The time travelling letter of John Smith

**Chapter 6. The time-travelling letter of John Smith.**

After Asahina-sensei said goodbye to me, I called home to apologize about arriving late. I explained to my parents that I needed to meet with Nagato-san's therapist and that the talk extended to a few hours.  
"Oh, Kyon?"  
"Yes, mom?"  
"Some guys delivered a huge safe and a brand new computer for you, with printer and everything. They told me it was a gift from Tsuruya-san to thank you for the Hanami. Kyon, I didn't know you were such a close friend of the Tsuruya family!"  
Wow, they're fast! We have to thank "the Agency" for this. My very own computer.  
"I'll tell you later about it. Thanks mom!"

After dinner, I went to my room and locked inside. What do you know, the computer was already installed! And it's got a printer for Haruhi's letters! Wow, thanks!

Hmmm... a safe box with a digital code. All for me. The code was none other than the date for my meeting with Haruhi-chan on Tanabata. Excellent.

Time to write the letter for Haruhi-chan. YAWN, I'll probably won't be able to sleep tonight, until I get that letter working. I turned on the PC, read the instructions given to me, and began writing the letter for Haruhi-chan on the word processor.

[ENVELOPE: DO NOT OPEN THE OTHER FOLDERS AND LETTERS! READ THIS FIRST!]

_Dear Haruhi-chan:_

_Asahina-sensei must have given you this bunch of letters. It is STRICTLY FORBIDDEN for you to open them before their marked dates and times. We could say that the future of the mankind depends on it._

_But first things first. To prove you that I'm the same person that you were told I am, I need to tell you this: Four years ago, on Tanabata, I was carrying a difficult mission, with a female coleague of mine. The reasons for her sleeping are too hard to explain, but I digress. So, I was carrying her on my back and climbed towards your junior high school. There I met you. You were going to write an encoded message to Hikoboshi and Orihime. The message roughly meant: 'I am here'."_

_One important thing: The above details MUST NOT BE LEAKED! That could mean many troubles for everyone of us, and especially, for the SOS brigade. Don't ask any details, this is confidential information. So, remember, don't tell anyone in the world about your Tanabata secret. And most importantly, NOT to Kyon-kun! Now relax, take a deep breath, and don't cry. It was my fault for not warning you. You had no way to know that this information was top-secret.  
_

[Hey, I forgot to thank her for remembering my name when Nagato turned the world upside down]

_I also have to thank you for saving my life. When I shouted "please take care of the John Smith who would shock the world!", I was talking about my own future, and in a way, your future, too. If you hadn't remembered my name, I wouldn't be here today. Don't ask me how, because it's too complicated. So, with all my heart, I thank you. I also have to apologize if you missed me. Asahina-sensei told me that you got too attached to me these four years. I swear that my intention never was to play with your feelings._

[Alright. So far so good. Now, what did Asahina-san said? Ah, yes. To treat Haruhi as my younger sister. Just what did she mean when she said I would be making out with Nagato? Ugh...]

_I don't know if I ever really believed in Santa Claus, but watching you that night working so hard for your beliefs really pulled a string on me. From a skeptic, we could say that our encounter turned me intro a true believer. Yes, Haruhi-chan, thanks to you, I now believe in Aliens, Espers,Time travel, and who knows? Maybe sliders also exist. However, I don't believe in fate. I believe only us can build our future. What use is knowing the future if you can't change it? Worse, knowing the future may actually PREVENT us from changing it. Our future depends on the decisions we take everyday._

_Anyway, part of my mission happened to be to meet you and help you with your interstellar message. How did my superiors know that you were going to write that message, it still baffles me. But I had to do it to save my own life and the life of my friends. In the end, you may not know it, but I ended up helping the SOS brigade. It was a wonderful adventure which I'll share with you another day._

_I later learned that you were a very special person. And with "special", i mean above ordinary humans. I didn't want to believe it at first, but I happened to meet a young man who claimed to be an esper, and whose abilities depend on your subconscious. He (let's call him "K-Kun") tells me that he knows when your emotions are extremely unstable, and when you're dealing with a lot of pain, as if you were calling for help. When he notices your pleas for help, he actually helps you. How he does it, I really don't know, but he told me you had today a huge struggle between anger and guilt. The time when K-kun told me suffered most stress was between Noon and 2PM. Is that true?_

_So, if what he says is true, then you really are a very special person, Haruhi-chan. When you meet him in the future (which depends on you being "ready") , I'm sure you will recognize him somehow and say "I knew it was you" or something. Oh - he also told me that he likes you. Who knows, maybe he could become your boyfriend in the future! If you allow him to, of course._

[ Koizumi, when we first met, you told me you liked Haruhi. Why not take a chance? ]

_But what I'm trying to say, is that you are indeed a very special person. Have you ever watched TV shows where the main character ended up to have the key to save the world from destruction and defeat great enemies? I usually liked the stories with reluctant heroes, they were much more interesting. Classic TV shows where the hero is eager to learn the 'way of the Force' didn't appeal to me very much, I could say they were even boring, don't you think? But I'm going off-track again. It's just that I want to tell you so many things and I can't really think where to begin with. Anyway, feel free to try to bend spoons or paperclips with your mind once in a while. DON'T DO THIS IN PUBLIC! At most try to do it in front of the Brigade, but behind locked doors. Imagine the chaos that this would cause if other people found out. This practice will help you focus your abilities. Don't get frustrated if you can't at first._

_But we'll talk in later letters about achieving your potential and not destroying the world in the process ;-)  
Just kidding._

[I'm sure she will be reading this and shout "idiot! You scared me!". Boy, this is much more fun than I imagined! Have a taste of your own medicine, Brigade Commander! hahah!]

_Meanwhile, you can try out other of your abilities by using Zener cards, heating cold cups of tea, etc. But this will have to be done much later, when you mature and your emotions are more stable. Don't forget to regularly do the relaxation exercises that Asahina-sensei shared with you._

_Anyway, please let me continue with what I was writing. As you put so much effort in sending a message to the stars, or to the gods, or whatever, I remembered my little sister, who still believed in Santa Claus. But I think that your message was not written in vain. I'm sure something special happened that day. And I'm glad I was part of it. Perhaps I can say 'Merry christmas!' to you, but next year I'll definitely put a tag on a bamboo leaf that says: 'Please give little Haruhi-chan a happiness that will never go away'. Hey, now that I think of it, don't you think it would be better if you had been dressed in a yukata when writing that message? I'm sure you would have looked very cute. I would put a picture of that young and energetic Haruhi-chan on my fridge. Maybe when my mission to look after you is over, we can meet in person and have a Tanabata party with you and your friends._

_It will be very probable that you'll be very happy to talk to me. I feel the same. By the way, if you become happier tomorrow, feel free to say that you received a letter from your "uncle John" whom you hadn't talked to in a long time._

[There. That should do it. Now, to the mission part.]

_How was your talk with Asahina-sensei? That reminds me - when she was much younger, maybe the age of Mikuru-chan, she would get scared of everything and cry for everything. I still remember when I saw her cry for stupid things like being bossed around a little. She looked so cute that I just felt I had to protect her. I bet Mikuru-chan is just like that, right? Anyway. I would like to hear from your own lips what happened tonight with Asahina-sensei. Don't worry about sharing top-secret stuff, I have top secret clearance! One of the reasons I want you to write that, is because we're evaluating Asahina-sensei's performance when helping "special" people like you. By now she should be doing it really well - how would you like to treat Nagato-san? Also, we also need to know if she made any mistakes or told you anything she shouldn't have, this is why we need to know the slightest detail of what she said and did. But don't get mistaken. You're not "some specimen" to me. You're a very good friend, almost a sister - and I've wanted to write you since a long time ago. Also, I want you to share what you said and did, and how you felt about it. I also want to be able to see with my mind what I couldn't see with my own eyes."_

_Okay. Enough with introductions. What I need you to do now is very important for the future._

_"MISSION 1. FOR YOUR EYES ONLY."_

[This will get her excited!]

_Your first mission is to write the letter that I asked you earlier. Tomorrow morning, Asahina-sensei will meet you and you must give the sealed letter to her. For security reasons, she may not be the Asahina-sensei that you talked to, but probably a double, so maybe she doesn't remember what happened. Also, please try to speak the least possible to her._

_You need to make two versions of the letter. The first version will be for personnel evaluation purposes (for Asahina-sensei's boss) and this is where you need to give all the details you can about what she said and did - also, what you said and did, and what you would have liked her to say. Try to be as objective as possible._

_The other letter will be personal, and you can talk about your feelings, emotions, questions, and anything else you want. You know - it's possible that I'll never find out what happened with Asahina-sensei, after all. I don't think they'll grant me access to your evaluation letter. So if you want to write what happened, feel free to do so in this second letter._

_Also, don't give Asahina-sensei the personal letter for me right away. Please keep it in a safe box in your room. If you don't have a safe box, IMPROVISE! Then, who knows? You might purchase one of those instant lottery tickets tomorrow and get a free one. In any case, six months from now, you will meet Asahina-sensei again with a briefcase. Give her all your replies for me, and she will give you more letters from me._

_Hey, since I need you to write replies to my own letters, why not group the letters in folders categorized in weeks? This way we can be sure that the letters don't get lost for some reason. You'll notice that my own letters also got grouped in weeks. Tomorrow you will understand the reason why I'm doing so, so please be patient._

_THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT! YOU MUST PROTECT THOSE LETTERS WITH YOUR LIFE! Remember we'll be talking about Top Secret stuff. You may wonder - isn't it safer to send them to a secret e-mail on the internet? I don't trust the internet. It's too dangerous and we don't know who might be eavesdropping. This is why, in my eyes, Asahina-sensei's "express" delivery service is much more reliable._

_So, you may be wondering. How I'll respond to your letter if I won't receive it until six months? You don't need to worry about that. But trust me when I say this: Write those letters as if I would answer them tomorrow. Do you trust me, Haruhi-chan? If you do, please write those two letters and keep them in your safe. Just don't confuse the one for me and the one for Asahina-sensei's boss. You can mark one "For Uncle John" and the other "For Asahina-sensei"._

_A note of warning. When the time comes for you to open the next letter from me, MAKE SURE THAT ALL THE LETTERS THAT YOU HAVE FINISHED WRITING, HAVE BEEN SEALED ALREADY! And if, for some reason, you need to reopen it, MARK MY OWN LETTERS AS "READ" on the back. You don't understand right now why I'm asking you this. Just let me tell you that this is just as important as Tanabata._

_But it's better be safe than sorry. DO NOT OPEN MY LETTERS UNTIL YOUR OWN LETTERS FOR ME ARE IN THE ENVELOPES AND THE ENVELOPES ARE SEALED AND IN THE SAFE BOX! THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT! When the time comes, you will understand._

[By now you, the readers, should be wondering why I wrote that paragraph that Asahina-sensei wrote in the set of instructions. I thought about it, and it was very logical. Because we're going to use "time travel" to communicate with those letters, it's probable that Haruhi will open back her own letter to test if it's the same letter, alright, but from a different time plane. Then, she could confuse the letter that she would send to me, and send her already-sent letter. In other words, the original wouldn't ever be sent, and I would end up with a blank paper instead of a letter - or worse, space-time could become unstable!

Damn! Asahina-sensei, why didn't you tell me about the danger of this situation! Hmm. I better jot this down for my next letter to her. Better safe than sorry.]

_MISSION 2._

_Tomorrow morning, talk to Nagato-san and share your feelings with her. Please try to be as less-threatening as possible. Remember that her emotional state right now is very unstable. Wait. Asahina-sensei tells me [actually she said that in the guidelines that I was reading] that perhaps you could try to focus mentally on her to cure her problem with expressing her emotions. I'm not so sure if this would be the right way. You're still too young and inexperienced. What is she thinking of? I got a better idea. Since you could enter her dream once, try to enter it again tonight - just make sure to knock first, we don't want to scare her._

_But maybe she will get scared anyway. In that case, just tell her what you need to from outside the door. Don't try to open the door on your own, you must wait until she does. Remember it's her subconscious. If you open the door against her will... but let's not think about that, ok?_

_If she opens to you, you'll be in a much better position to help her heal. Asahina-sensei tells me that in her dream, giving her a hug with all your love"_

[hmmm... she says love is a disease, I better clarify]

_(and I mean fraternal love, not romantic love), and telling her not to be afraid of showing her emotions, might just do the trick. To be honest, I'd love to see it work. Nagato-san is a very dear person for me. When I found out that she had a nervous crisis, it nearly broke my heart, but don't feel guilty about it. That was bound to happen sooner or later._

_Just so that you don't forget:_

_1) If you get connected to her dreams again, comfort her and do everything possible to tell her that you will not get mad at her._

_But I wonder if you'll be able to do it - not getting mad at her for wanting to be with Kyon-kun, that is. Do you really have feelings for Kyon-kun? I have no right to tell you who to love and who not to love. It's your personal choice, Haruhi-chan, and only you can take it. But if you decide to fight for Kyon-kun's love, don't cheat! Using your esper powers to drive her away from Kyon-kun is considered cheating, and EVIL. After all, Kyon-kun is also free to choose who he wants to be with. The freedom to choose who to love is something that is part of human nature - and if aliens exist, I would say it is a part of all sentient beings (hey, aliens have also the right to be happy, don't they?)_

_2) When awake, whether you get jealous or not, at least give her the chance to express her feelings. And, if you ever feel lonely, or betrayed, or abandoned, contact me (you'll later find out how) and tell me to call Asahina-sensei for you. And in the remote case that you can't communicate with me, call her with your mind. Hey, perhaps you could try talking to K-kun with your mind and tell him to contact Asahina-sensei. I'm sure you'll get a phone call from her, right away. That, I'm sure you can do with your current abilities._

_Oh, and don't even think about trying to contact ME telepathically! I have too many secrets that would be dangerous for you if one of them leaked out. And I would get very angry! (Sorry, I have to be very strict on this.)_

[ There, that should do it! ]

_MISSION 3._

_Tomorrow, in the brigade activities, watch the american movie "Frequency". I don't care how you get it. Borrowed, or downloaded, or rented. You may need to leave your computer on all night. Just get it, and project it tomorrow for the whole brigade. Pay special attention to the "time capsule" used by the father on the evidence._

[What father? What evidence? Time capsule? Ah, whatever. I guess I'll find out tomorrow.]

_Oh, Asahina-sensei told me this could be a great opportunity to help Nagato-san in dealing with her feelings for Kyon-kun. why not use the movie projection to give Nagato-san some time to express her feelings to Kyon-kun?  
[What the? Asahina-sensei, why are you making me write this? That's like cheating in my own favor! Wait a second - why my favor? Isn't Nagato-san the one who's in love with me? Or do I really... love her? Hold it, Kyon! Remember your mission!]  
Hey, why not leave it to luck? This way you could try out some of your esper abilities. Split the team in two, as you always do. Try to focus on the straws and try to get Nagato-san and Kyon-kun on the second team. The first team will be in front row, and the second team will be in the last row._

[Asahina-san, you're practically asking Haruhi to make a date for me and Nagato-san! What the heck are you thinking of! Oh, well. If the world ends, it's YOUR fault!]

_And don't cheat! You must not use any physical means to determine the result. Only focus with your mind. But this is only a suggestion. If you decide to put Kyon-kun and Nagato-san together, just say you changed your mind. Anyway, if you decide to do it, DO NOT GET JEALOUS!_

_Repeat after me: Negative emotions are an esper's worst enemy._

_If you can't control your emotions, go to a gym and punch a boxing bag with all your strength. Or cry. Or do anything but keep those negative feelings. Remember what you told Kyon-kun once: That keeping your feelings to yourself would be bad. So, focus your emotions on positive things. Remember your promise with Asahina-sensei. And in case you need to talk with Asahina-sensei about your feelings, you know what to do._

_Back to the movie projection: Being in the front row will allow you to not get distracted, and focus instead on the real core of your mission: Watching the movie and paying attention to the "time capsule". What time capsule? I don't have the slightest idea since I haven't watched the movie, either, so don't ask me._

_MISSION SUMMARY._

_ABOVE ALL: KEEP THE TANABATA DETAILS (THOSE ONLY YOU AND I KNOW) TO YOURSELF. YOU MUST NOT SHARE THEM WITH ANYONE OF THE SOS BRIGADE, AND ESPECIALLY, NOT TO KYON-KUN. Trust me when I say this: KYON-KUN MUST NOT KNOW ABOUT 'JOHN SMITH' OR THE TANABATA DETAILS. Protect this secret with your life. When the time comes, you'll understand the reason. Just know that Kyon-kun's future and my future are closely tied. But don't worry about it. Just be careful about sharing secrets in the future.  
_

_MISSION 0 - TOP PRIORITY: If for any reason, you become very upset and your emotions become unstable, or if you feel like your world is crumbling, call upon K-kun telepathically and tell him to call Asahina-sensei. She will contact you as soon as possible. Meanwhile, do the relaxation exercises that she taught you. Oh, and if you feel you shouldn't upset Asahina-sensei just because you lost a bet, then grow up. Your tolerance to frustration is practically ZERO, and that's the WORST thing for an Esper! That's something you need to improve, starting with yesterday!_

[ Finally! I've wanted to say this for ages! Sniff! Asahina-san, you've made me very happy! Thank you! ]

_MISSION 1: Write the letters for Asahina-sensei's superior, and for me. Give the letter to Asahina-sensei's superior to her, and keep the letter for me in a safe box. DO NOT OPEN THE OTHER LETTERS UNTIL THE TIME MARKED ON THEM!_

_MISSION 2: If you see Nagato-san in your dreams, help her overcome her nervous crisis, and, if you can, hug her and tell her that you would like her to show her emotions, for her own good._

_MISSION 3: Watch the movie "Frequency" starring Dennis Quaid. Key words to pay attention to: Changes in time, time capsules.  
MISSION 3-B (optional) : Give the chance for Nagato-san and Kyon-kun to cuddle. It's for Nagato-san. Also, tell Nagato-san that if Kyon-kun ever crosses the allowed limits, that she can complain to you and you'll give him the appropriate punishment._

_MISSION 4 (optional): If you have a photo album, do you have a picture of yourself in a Yukata when you were a child? I just want to remember that Tanabata. If you can, put it in your personal reply to this letter. Hey, why not telling me in your next letter what are your feelings for the brigade members? I'm just curious._

_Well, those are your missions for now, Brigade Commander! Good luck, and Godspeed!_

_Counselor John Smith, aka "Uncle John", out.  
_[END OF LETTER]

Yawn! I'm so tired! Now, let's put this letter in a folder of its own, and tag it.

Okay, now let's put the sealed folder in the safe,

Finally, I will know if this experiment works. But I'm too tired now. Time to sleep. Hopefully, I'll have a good rest tonight.

(End of chapter 6)


	7. The transformation of Nagato Yuki

**Chapter 7. The transformation of Nagato Yuki.**

It was late, and I still couldn't sleep. I wondered if I didn't screw up on that letter about asking Haruhi-chan to send me a picture of her childhood self on a Yukata. But I wonder how I'll be able to see if things got Ok.

I got curious, so I decided to read her reply. I just hope I don't break space-time by doing this.

Let's see... tomorrow's date... here it is.  
I swallowed. I really hope that Asahina-san doesn't reprimand me for trying to correct the past, er present ... future... whatever. Sigh. Here goes nothing.

(Author's note: For convenience, Haruhi's letter will be italicized, while John's letter will be on bold - styles not available in the .txt version).

_"Dear Uncle John: Please forgive me for saying this.  
ARE YOU AN IDIOT? What's all that sentimental talk on the beginning of your letter? And then asking me to give you a picture of myself as a child? Are you a lolicon or what? Eew!!! I didn't want to believe Sensei when she told me you were a perv, but she was absolutely right!"_

I was petrified in shock. Asahina-san, what did you tell Haruhi about me! You traitor! Now she thinks I'm a perv!

_"Hey! I'm supposed to be admiring you! Fine way to ruin a childhood image, you moron. ARGH! Now I know why I brought Kyon to the brigade. He looked just as idiotic as you are! I should have paid more attention to my psychology class when they mentioned the Electra complex. I almost ended up falling in love with him, thanks to you. Well done, sir! Now, everytime I'll think of you, I'll be thinking about Kyon! CONGRATULATIONS! I'LL BE SCARRED FOR LIFE! And what was that about being happy to read your letter? It was a HUGE disappointment!"_

OH CRAP! ALRIGHT, I get it. I'll rewrite that letter for you! I ripped appart the original letter, and turned on my computer. I guess this will be a really really long night.

Okay, here it is. I guess I'll remove the part about the Yukata. But how to rephrase? Let's see:  
I'll change the paragraph about the Yukata to:

**"Hey, now that I think of it, perhaps you could have been dressed in a yukata when writing that message? Just a thought. It could have given that a much better atmosphere. But we can't change our past decisions. Still, it was fun drawing those pictograms with you." And when mentioning Uncle John, perhaps I should write: "You can mark one 'For Uncle John' (hey, don't ask me why they chose that name - perhaps it's some code name to not break the student/mentor relationship) and the other 'For Asahina-sensei'."**

I'll remove that stupid "Mission 4".

Okay. Original letter... shredded. Printing new one... done. Let's see if Haruhi's words changed. In theory, they should.

_"Dear John:_

_You're right, 'Uncle John' is stupid. And what's with 'Haruhi-chan' anyway? Why are you calling me that way? It sounds even more stupid. Am I a chibi character in a parody cartoon or what? But I guess I'll accept it, since you're probably older and more experienced than me now. Hey, shouldn't that be "Haruhi-kun" instead?"_

I felt like Graham Bell when he found out his telephone worked. Eureka! It works! I changed Haruhi's reaction! Asahina-sensei, was this the real reason why you used time travel to give me those letters? So I wouldn't ruin Haruhi's impression of me? But I still wasn't satisfied with the result. Haruhi, if you don't like it, I don't like it either. Let's see if I can change the original again.

From "Dear Haruhi-chan:", to:  
**"Dear Haruhi-chan:**

**(Sorry for calling you like that, but whenever I think of you, you're still that young junior-high girl for me. It just wouldn't feel right calling you by your name, it's too intimate, and you're not my girlfriend. So please bear with me calling you 'Haruhi-chan')"**

Let's see if Haruhi's reaction changed again. Cross your fingers, Kyon...

_"Dear John: You're right, 'Uncle John' is stupid. And I guess you're right about not calling me by my name without suffix. It would make it look like we're a couple. But, can I be sincere with you? I wouldn't mind if it was you. There's so much to tell you that I don't know where to start! You know, I think that calling you 'Uncle John' maybe isn't a bad idea after all. It's much more fun, don't you think? Like if you were my secret boss and I was your secret agent. I love it!"_

Was this really happening? Was I changing Haruhi's actual response to my letter? At that moment, I felt like Isaac Newton realizing a truth after the apple fell on his head (altho it didn't actually fall on his head):

So this is how Asahina-sensei's dialog was rehearsed. Why else would they ask Haruhi to tell about the things that she didn't like about that interview? I'm sure that at first she won't like many things, and perhaps she was just about to destroy the world. So, after sending the review, Asahina-sensei's team would have told her not to do this or that. So they send her back in time "again" (I quote "again" because when they sent her, Haruhi didn't have to repeat that part again. So they DID alter the result of Haruhi's conversation by fixing Asahina-sensei's mistakes BEFORE THEY ACTUALLY TOOK PLACE!

I made a drawing to understand this better. Koizumi, you bastard, you infected me with your diagram-making enthusiasm. Let's see.

If we draw a loop in time, like in that eternal August, Haruhi kept repeating the same time over and over. But with Asahina-sensei's dialog, it was more like a wire drawing 6 or 7 loops before becoming straight again. Let's separate the loops one centimeter from each other. Each loop would be an "attempt"... I'll use my math teacher's words: "iteration"... to improve the result. Like a division where we increase the number of decimals in the quotient. Now, how did he say that was called? Ah, yes! Successive approximations.

But in this case, the quotient would be Asahina-sensei's rehearsal. And the remainder would be Haruhi's complaints. As Haruhi complained less and less, there would be a point in the "hypothetical time" where no changes were needed. And the loop would end.

Now that I think of it, I had a feeling of Deja-vu when I saw Haruhi and Asahina-sensei talking. Just like that end of August, but much milder. I understand now. Time repeated itself as many times as it was necessary for Asahina-sensei to reach the optimal results expected by Haruhi - So that's how it worked!! Ah, Asahina-sensei, you didn't tell me about this, you naughty girl! You DID tamper with time, didn't you? Maybe you did in a previous iteration of time, but now you don't know you did!

Let's go on with the rest of the letter.

_"I could have never suspected that I saved your life. Is this for real? I'm very happy right now!"_

Hey, is that a teardrop on the paper? Haruhi, are you crying again?

_"Oh, don't you dare think this is a teardrop. It was some drop of water because I was thirsty."_

Yeah, right. You don't fool me, Haruhi, this is John Smith! I smiled and congratulated myself.

_"Sorry for staining the letter with water, but I'm too tired right now and I still have to write the review for Sensei's boss. Anyway, I have so many emotions right now... please don't scare me like that! Today was an emotional rollercoaster for me, and I don't want to have to live another one like that EVER. But just knowing that you're safe makes me feel better."_

Sorry, Haruhi, but I have to do this. Knowing you, you jump to conclusions more quickly than a pack of hungry wolves would jump over a wounded lamb. I'm sure you'll interpret that "take care of John Smith" as "getting married to him and make a family". Especially with Nagato's crisis, I don't want to take that risk.

_"You did well in apologizing. I waited three years! Those were the worst three years of my life! Why didn't you give me your real name! I looked everywhere for you, but how was I supposed to search for an alias?"_

I'm sorry, Haruhi. I'm sorry, but this was unavoidable.

_"Sorry, it's just that I'm still trying to digest everything Sensei told me. With Yuki, her nightmares, me being an Esper... are there any others like me? I want to meet them. But at least I know they're real. Thank you for that."_

Good, good! Come on, Haruhi, share your feelings! Share all you want!

_"I'm sorry I can't tell you what happened with Sensei. Can't you just ask her personally? Yes, I cried. I cried a lot! It hurt! But you know what? I guess I needed it. But I'm too exhausted right now."_

Exhausted? You tell me! I'm sorry, Haruhi, but it's time you feel a little bit of the responsibility of not destroying the world. No, that's not true. But hey, I get tired too! I'm not a god like you, I'm a common human being.

_"I don't know if I'll be able to really call Yuki in my dreams tonight. This is hard to believe. I still have the suspicion that this could be a prank played on me by Kyon and the brigade. Kyon, if it's really you writing this I swear that I'll send you to the hospital with all your bones broken!"_

Gulp. But don't worry, Haruhi, when you see your reply included in my next letter, your jaw will drop.

_"Sorry. It's still too hard to believe. Oh my God! It bent! The paperclip bent just by thinking about it!!! I'm scared. I'm very scared! It was so easy, is there a way to turn this off? The room! HELP ME!!!"_

Shit! Shit! Shit!!!! Koizumi, I hope you're not having to deal with Avatars at this time of night, I'm sorry! Please calm Haruhi. Haruhi, remember the relaxation techniques! That's precisely why Asahina-san taught you!

Aw, crap, there goes another letter.

I'll change the paragraph on bending spoons again:

**"Anyway, feel free to try to bend spoons or paperclips with your mind once in a while. BUT BE CAREFUL! Before doing it, remember:**

**1. Do it in PRIVATE! This is not only because of the scandal you could make, but you could suddenly lose control. It has happened to many Espers (or so I've been told): that they suddenly lose control of their abilities and they suffer an overload. You don't want to lose control in public, do you?**

**2. If you ever feel like the whole room is bending around you, stop what you're doing and remember Asahina-sensei's relaxation methods. So, instead of trying to bend a paperclip, get three or four paperclips and try to bend ONLY ONE. Also, visualize the room around you being COMPLETELY NORMAL. Think of it this way: You're creating a bubble around you that only allows what is inside the bubble to react upon your esp powers. Everything outside is immune to it. When trying to bend a paperclip, or a spoon, or whatever you like, visualize a bubble around it so that it can be affected by your thoughts. Hey, it doesn't have to be a 'bubble', just an 'ESP field' around it. By thinking that only what is inside that field can be affected, you'll preserve everything outside that field."**

When I was writing that, I realized how easy it would be for me to give Haruhi ideas of how to control her power. She just had to believe it, and it would become true.

**"If everything fails, repeat this mantra in your mind: 'Everything's normal, everything's normal, everything's normal'. Carrying an amulet with that mantra might just do the trick. It's not that the amulet is magical, but if you remember that you have it around you, it will help you focus and keep things completely under control."**

A little placebo amulet for Haruhi, eh? That sounds even better.

**"As your control over your abilities progresses, later you won't need the amulet to remain in control. Think of it as a hypnotic suggestion that actually works. Because, after all, if you think you're safe, you're safe. That's how things work with espers, as K-kun tells me."**

Let's check again. Haruhi, I hope you don't get a Deja-vu overload. Take it easy on me, this is only my third day being John Smith!

_"Oh my God! It bent! The paperclip bent just by thinking about it!!! Thank you for your advise! I nearly panicked for a second but I remembered what you wrote. I did feel the room around me was all being bent. But I feel fine again. You know what, I'll make that amulet right now and I'll carry it with me all the time. I'll stop doing those experiments for now. They're just too scary. Please give me more self-control tips in the future."_

As I was reading this, I realized the real importance of my mission. It wasn't just an experiment anymore. It was like learning to be a firefighter by putting out a fire in a building with real people. Haruhi, did YOU freak out? You should have seen how _I_ felt!  
I went on reading.

_"I'm exhausted! Focusing on the energy field/bubble that you mentioned got me very tired, and I still have to write the letter for Sensei. This will be a very long night!_

By the way, right now I got a very strong feeling of Deja vu. Is it normal? Or just my imagination?"

I'm sorry Haruhi, that's classified information for now! I kept reading.

_"I'm so tired! I need to hurry and finish this letter to you. I still don't understand, if you're going to receive it in 6 months, why am I writing as if you were going to read this tomorrow? That's not logical, but I believe you._

_If I can contact Yuki, I'll be careful. I promise. Do you really believe I'll be ready to heal her? Somehow, I know I can, but I don't know if I can today. I don't want to hurt her, and I'm even more scared of trying that out. I just don't want anything to go out of control. Is this part of the training? It is, right? I need to control my emotions._

_You were totally right about that! I feel so stupid! I promise I'll try to accept failure whenever it comes. But how do you train for that? I should ask Sensei about this, right?_

_Tomorrow morning I'll search for the movie. I'll skip classes if I have to. It's a promise. I'll let Yuki be with Kyon for a while. It's only fair, and I don't want anything worse to happen to her._

_You know, I'm really disappointed at myself. I'm leading the SOS Brigade and I haven't even had time to know more about the problems and personal life of the other members. I don't know how much I have to thank you, you really came to me when I most needed it._

_Can I ask you a question? Are you an Esper, Alien or Time traveler? I mean, you even knew about the bubble. As if you were reading my feelings or knew in advance how this would happen. Oh, nevermind. It has happened to other espers, right? For a moment I thought that you were from the future or something. Please tell me when I can meet you. I would like to take those Esper training courses you guys have._

_Good bye, and thank you so much! THANK YOU!_

_With my deepest admiration,  
Suzumiya Haruhi.  
Commander of the SOS Brigade."_

I sighed in relief. Finally this was over. After a lot of corrections, a few time quakes, and a lot of wasted paper, I had finished. At least I didn't spend all night trying to edit a low-budget movie!

I closed and tagged the envelope with a permanent marker, warning and everything. Off to the safe box.

I put on my pajamas and went to bed. I'm dead.

* * *

The next morning, when I arrived at school, there was a commotion going on.  
"Did you see her?"  
"Oh, how I would love to be at her class!"  
"She's just beautiful! I wonder if she has a boyfriend."  
"Don't be an idiot! I bet she already has a boyfriend! There's no way she could be available to anyone!"

Hey, what's going on?  
"Kyon! Haven't you heard?" said Taniguchi.  
"Heard what?"  
"We got a new History teacher, and she's gorgeous!"  
"A new history teacher? Hey, our first class today is history!"  
"Yes, this is why we're so excited!"  
"By the way, have you seen Haruhi today?"  
"No, but who cares!"

"Excuse me, I've got something to do."

I don't care who this new teacher is, I need to find out how Nagato felt last night. Did Haruhi really visit her in her dreams? Would she be feeling better, or worse?

I looked for Nagato in her class and they told me she was in the Literature Club room.

I knocked.  
"Hello? Nagato?"  
"Come in."  
I entered, and closed the door behind me. Nagato was reading a book.  
"How are you feeling?"  
"Confused..."  
"Did you sleep well?"  
"Suzumiya Haruhi contacted me again in my dreams."  
"Oh, she did?"  
Nagato looked at me and nodded.  
"What did she say?"  
"She said that she was sorry and that I could keep you for a while. I thanked her, but I don't know if she was telling the truth. I still did not let her see me, she only talked behind the door. I'm still afraid."  
"I understand, Nagato. It's normal to be afraid. Did she say anything else?"  
"She said she spoke with my therapist and that she understood my problems. She said she wished I could heal soon. She promised she would help me. But I don't know if she will still get jealous."

Nagato paused for a few seconds, and looked at me again.  
"What did you tell her?"

I told Nagato what happened yesterday with Asahina-sensei, and what I wrote to Haruhi as John Smith.

"I see..."

I approached Nagato, and crouched in front of her. "Nagato, you don't have to be afraid anymore. She will understand."  
"Are you sure?"  
"Yes", I said, smiling. "I'm sure. And if for some reason Haruhi ends up destroying the world... I'll still be with you till the end."  
"Till the end?"  
"Till the end."  
"But... why?"  
"Because I love you, you fool! That's why!"

Nagato looked down and opened her book.  
"Nagato, what's happening? Are you feeling Ok?"  
Nagato stood up suddenly and covered her face with her left hand. She touched her face, as if she was examining it. "Something's wrong..."  
"What? What's wrong, Nagato?"  
Nagato dropped the book that she was reading. The book fell to the floor open wide, and some pages got crumpled. I had never seen Nagato drop a book so suddenly.  
"Nagato, what's wrong!"  
"My... face..."

She looked surprised, but there were tears flowing down from her eyes.

I couldn't resist any longer. I hugged her with all my strength. "Don't worry, Nagato, it's Ok, you can cry, you can cry all you want!"

"Data... overflowing... security protocols bypassed... I can't... resist... anymore... help..."  
"Don't try to fight it, Nagato, just cry, JUST CRY!"  
"Help me!"  
"JUST CRY, DAMMIT! AND THAT'S AN ORDER!" I shouted with all my strength. "CRY!!!"

I felt as if something very strong was grabbing the clothes behind me. I knew it was Nagato's hands.

I suddenly heard sobbing, and some yelling. It was horrible and painful, but at the same time... it felt good.  
"It's Ok, Nagato, it's Ok! Cry all you want!"

I don't know how many minutes passed, but they felt like hours. Nagato calmed down, and her grabbing of my back slowly became a soft hug.

Just one more minute... just one more minute... I kept hugging her, until I felt she had calmed down completely. I quickly grabbed a chair, and we sat down together.

"Are you feeling better, Nagato?"  
She nodded, before hugging me again. She rested her head on my shoulder.  
"It's Ok, Nagato, it's Ok."  
"Something's changed". Her tone of voice changed back to her usual self.  
"Changed? What changed?"

She broke the hug, and looked at me. Her cheeks looked red from the crying, but her expression looked surprised. "My system has been... upgraded."  
"Upgraded? What do you mean?"

"Several new protocols have been installed and started. All checks OK. Noise levels: Zero. Sending information about newly installed protocols to the Integrated Data Sentient Entity... GASP!"

"Nagato!?"

Nagato began to float in the air while a golden, glittery aura surrounded her. Nagato, what's happening?

**"Beginning transmission. Please wait...**

**Protocol code sent. Awaiting analysis by the Integrated Data Sentient Entity...  
Analysis inconclusive. Please stand by...**

**New Mission received.  
Agent identification: Nagato Yuki.  
Data modification rank increased by one.  
Agent Rank modified.  
New Agent Rank: Primary Ambassador.  
Mission Brief:  
- Continue your current interaction with Suzumiya Haruhi and with other human beings.  
- Obtain further information about the newly installed protocols.  
- Observe subjects "Suzumiya Haruhi" and "Nagato Yuki", and report all relevant information.  
- Protect all members of the human association known as "SOS brigade".  
- Request political protection to the SOS brigade for the Integrated Data Sentient Entity.  
Mission Information acknowledged and accepted.  
End of Transmission."**

Nagato slowly landed and stopped glowing, and fainted for a second.

"Nagato? Nagato, are you feeling Ok?"

"... ... ...? !?!?"

She paused, and looked at me, confused and surprised.

I was even more surprised. She quickly looked down, and blushed.  
"Don't look at me like that! It's... embarrassing."

Wait a minute. Did her tone of voice just change? Did she tell me that she was embarrassed?

"What did you say?"  
Nagato gasped and covered her mouth with her palm. She looked at me.

"!!"

She quickly touched her face, as if she was trying to recognize it. She looked at me again, and then...

She smiled. She smiled!

"I... I understand now... I... understand now!" she said. She was smiling like she never had smiled before. Not even in the alternate world that she had created, was her smile so radiant.

"Nagato, what was that?"  
She looked at me with a beautiful smile. "You were completely right... the random data was in fact my own emotions. I just had no idea of how to interpret them... until now. Thank you."  
"You're welcome."  
"But, there were other protocols received... I don't understand."  
"What do you mean?"  
"Can we talk about that later?"  
"As you wish."

Nagato looked at me and hugged me, but I tripped with one of the chairs and we end up falling to the floor. All I could see was Nagato's face.  
"I'm sorry, are you ok!?" she asked.

I nodded. "Yes... I'm ok, you?"  
Nagato sat up on the floor and helped me sit up, too.  
"Sorry... I didn't mean to knock you down."  
"No problem."

Nagato blinked twice and looked at me. She looked away and began to blush.  
"Request permission... for... kiss."  
Nagato, did you just say... what?  
She looked at me, blushing more and more. "Request... permission... for kiss... please?"

I don't know if I was blushing at that time, but how could I refuse to that smile? In fact, how could anybody?  
I smiled. "Permission granted."

Nagato closed her eyes, and her palms softly touched my cheeks. Our lips touched each other slowly.  
She stopped, and looked at me.

That angelical smile, that tenderness in her eyes, those blushing cheeks... Asahina-san, you have just been dethroned. There's a new cuteness queen in this brigade, and her name is Nagato Yuki!  
The queen is dead, long live the queen!

"Kyon..."  
"Yes?"  
"There's something I need to tell you."  
"What is it?"  
"I love you."  
"I love you too."

She closed her eyes and kissed me again, while we were hugging each other.

I felt as if I had been kissed by a goddess. Oh, great goddess Nagato, thank you for choosing a mere mortal like me to be by your side!  
"Did you call me a goddess?"  
"What - did you read my thoughts?"  
"I think I did... but... I don't understand why. I'm sorry, I didn't want to intrude your thoughts."  
"No problem."  
I really don't know what happened. Maybe it was the change in Nagato's status that she was able to read my thoughts? After all, the thoughts were data, right? Or maybe it was something else?  
{ Does it matter? I love you. }  
{ Nagato, are you talking to my mind? }  
{ Yes. I love you! }  
{ I love you too! }

We kissed for a third time, letting our lips tell each other what our minds wanted to say.

But nothing could be perfect in this world. We had been just interrupted by a click, followed by the sound of the door opening.

"Yuki?? Kyon!?"

Nagato and I quickly turned around to look at the door. Shit, this can't be happening, it's Haruhi!

(End of chapter 7)

* * *

**Author's notes.**

Some of the readers have asked questions about this rather confusing episode.

**About the letters:**

Q. How does they work?  
A. See below.

First of all, we have the following premise: Both the letters from Haruhi to John Smith, **and** the letters from John Smith to Haruhi, come from 6 months in the future. This has the following consequences:

* The letters that Kyon writes to Haruhi won't affect Haruhi until she reads them. But that will also affect Haruhi's letters in the future, that Kyon will be reading.

* The moment when Kyon decides to change a letter, is linked to the time where Haruhi will read her letter. BUT, it is also linked to the time where Kyon reads Haruhi's reply - which may be one or two hours later. In other words, there is a "window" where both Haruhi's and Kyon's timeframes overlap. In Asahina Mikuru's words, it is an unstable time.

* Kyon can see the changes in Haruhi's letter, because that letter comes from a time frame POSTERIOR to the time when Kyon's letter was written. This is because the timeframe of Haruhi's letter is NOT of the current day, but from six months into the future. The changes can be seen in real time because of the "ripple effect" that has been mentioned in other sci-fi works, like the "Back to the Future" movie trilogy. This ripple effect is more apparent in the movie "Frequency" with Dennis Quaid, because the two timeframes are linked by the amateur radio. In other words, both timeframes are linked by not one, but TWO sources: a) The sequence of timeframes that are normal to space-time, and b) the letters that travelled in time. That's the reason why Haruhi was asked to see that movie: So that she could have a firm understanding of how inter-timeplane communication works.

* Basically, what happens is that each letter written by John is a new iteration in a time loop (For a description of time loops, see "Endless Eight" in Volume 5 of the Suzumiya Haruhi light novels).  
The last letter for one same time closes the iterations and time becomes linear again.

**About Haruhi:**

Q. Why wouldn't Haruhi destroy the world if she gets angry at John Smith (and therefore, make changing the letter impossible)?  
A. Because Haruhi did NOT destroy the world, in fact! This is known because there is a future 6 months from now, where the letters were sent back to the past. Perhaps an explanation is that, instead of re-creating the world, Haruhi only wished for the letter to improve. This wish affected the Kyon in the very-near future so that he would change the letter.

**About Nagato:**

Q. What is the source for her new protocols? Is it Haruhi? Was it Kyon? Was it her own emotions?  
A. Classified information. What is not classified is that the new protocols were already received by her before she engaged in communication with the Integrated Data Sentient Entity.

Q. What happened on the 18th of December?  
A. See the 4th novel, "The disappearance of Suzumiya Haruhi". Google for baka-tsuki and you'll find a translation available, until you can purchase the novels in your country.

Q. Why couldn't Nagato express her emotions? Was she forbidden from doing it, or was it that she couldn't? Do the new protocols have anything to do with her?  
A. The new protocols have nothing to do with her expressing her emotions. Only at interpreting and understanding what she feels in her "soul". Nagato could as well smile if she proposed herself to do it, as she's perfectly capable of manipulating her own body. Therefore, the logical conclusion is that she did not express emotions either because she didn't want to, or because she wasn't allowed to. Perhaps she cried alone in her room when Kyon wasn't there to see her (remember that the Suzumiya Haruhi light novels only speak from Kyon's point of view. For more information refer to the Anthropic principle mentioned by Koizumi in "the Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi". But maybe the new protocols also allow her to acquire attributes present in normal human beings, like fainting or even feeling pleasure and pain. The next few chapters will explore more this information.

Q. What happened when she glowed and floated in the air?  
A. The new protocols received seem foreign to the Integrated Data sentient Entity, which the I.D.S.E. categorizes as valuable information to escape from their self-evolution (the content of the protocols is still unknown to the reader). This is seen as an achievement in Nagato's mission (Achievement unlocked!), so she is given a new mission and her attributes are modified to be able to comply with this mission. A possibility is that she was now allowed (or maybe even commanded) to show her emotions. Hence, her ability to smile or blush.

Q. How will the upgraded Nagato confront male passion?  
A. Classified information ;-)

**About Asahina-sensei:**

Q. Who's Asahina-Miyuki sensei?  
A. It's the future Asahina-san, the same that contacted Kyon near the end of the TV series. Well, she may be one year younger, we don't know that yet. But the name "Miyuki" was chosen by either her or her superiors, to prevent confusion with the younger Asahina Mikuru, or the one-week-older-than-now Asahina "Michiru" (See Volume 7 of the Suzumiya Haruhi Light Novels).

Q. Will she appear in the next chapter?  
A. Classified information ;-)

**About Kyon:**

Q. Was THIS the time where Haruhi saw them "making out"?  
A. Yes.

Thank you for your reviews and questions! Feel free to download and reproduce (without altering) this story, but keep giving me credit.


	8. The Apocalypse of Suzumiya Haruhi

**Chapter 8.  
The Apocalypse of Suzumiya Haruhi.**

(Last updated: 2009-04-23, 11:49PM. Many typos fixed, story improved)

We kissed for a third time, letting our lips tell each other what our minds wanted to say.

But nothing could be perfect in this world. We had been just interrupted by a click, followed by the sound of the door opening.

"Yuki?? Kyon!?"

Nagato and I quickly turned around to look at the door. Shit, this can't be happening, it's Haruhi!

Is this it? The end of the world? Will the work we did be in vain?

As if I was watching everything in slow motion, I looked at Haruhi's eyes in shock. But then her gaze focused on Nagato, who disappeared from my field of view. I quickly turned around and realized that Nagato had just fainted! She was about to hit the floor with her head when suddenly my arms moved on their own and held her.

"Yuki!!!"  
Haruhi ran towards her and help her sit up. "Kyon, get a doctor, quick!"

I ran as fast as I could to the door. Wait a minute, what am I doing? Nagato's an alien! She shouldn't faint! I turned around again.  
"WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT, HURRY UP!"

I ran down the stairs, then through the hall, when the bell rang and a tumult of students began to walk to the classrooms. This was precisely the time where it was most difficult to run. Aw, come on, not now, not now!

My thoughts were interrupted by a familiar voice, which made me turn around when I recognized it.  
"Kyon-kun?"  
It was Asahina-sensei! I quickly turned around. Why she was there at school was of no concern to me. I only thought of one word: Help!  
"Asahina-sensei! I'm so glad I found you, Nagato just fainted!"  
"Where?"  
"The club room!"

We ran back and found Nagato lying on the floor, her head reclined over Haruhi's rolled cardigan. Haruhi was sensing Nagato's pulse.

"Haruhi-chan?"  
"Sensei! Yuki just fainted!"  
"Let me see."

Asahina-sensei knelt down towards Nagato, and using her watch, she took her pulse. She approached her ear to Nagato's mouth and waited two seconds.

She sighed in relief. "She's fine, don't worry."

Haruhi sighed in response, too, and so did I. But then I understood that Asahina-sensei wasn't really Nagato's therapist. I laughed from inside. This lie was so well-elaborated that even I started to believe it. If Nagato were in real trouble the one to help her should be her alien colleague, Kimidori-san (the same girl that asked for our help when the president of the Computer Research Society disappeared). I better take note of that (better safe than sorry). In the future I'll add Kimidori-san's number to my cellphone. My thoughts were interrupted by Haruhi's voice.

"I'm sorry, it was my fault!"  
"Haruhi-chan, what happened?" asked Sensei.  
"I opened the room, and I saw Yuki and Kyon cuddling... I got surprised... then Yuki looked at me and she got scared, and then she fainted."  
"Did you say anything to her?"  
"Not yet, she just fainted when she saw me."

Haruhi frowned and looked at the floor. "She's still scared of me, isn't she?"  
"Don't worry about that", said Asahina-sensei. "How are you emotions doing?"  
"My emotions!?!? What about her!!"  
"Haruhi-chan, listen. Nagato-san's a very sensitive person. If you panic, she panics, so calm down, Ok? Just relax, take a deep breath..."  
I saw Sensei holding Haruhi's hands and caressing them. "Nagato-san's fine, she just fainted from the panic, but she's fine. You just need to be more delicate with her, but don't worry, ok?"  
Asahina-sensei hugged Haruhi and caressed her head from behind. "These things happen, but everything's fine." She stopped caressing Haruhi and spoke to me.  
"Kyon-kun, you can go back to class now, we'll be taking care of Nagato-san."  
"Okay." I nodded and closed the door. I suspected Asahina-sensei would give a huge lecture to Haruhi about being honest with herself and all that. But right now I needed to get to class. Crap, it's late! REALLY late!

I arrived to the classroom and... the teacher wasn't there. Great. I spend all that energy running to my classroom, only to find out that I had wasted calories and sweat. I felt disappointed and even a bit angry at the teacher. Making me run like that, how dared he? I sat down on my place, and heard the other students discussing their mundane and lustful thoughts (not that I didn't have mine, but at least I wasn't that shameless to talk about them in public).

"Man, what's going on with the teacher? I want to see her already!" said Taniguchi.  
Oh, the new teacher, I had forgotten.  
"Does anyone know how she looks?"  
"I don't know, but if I heard right, she could gain a lot of money by becoming a bikini idol!"  
"You perverts!" shouted a nearby girl. "Is all you can think about?"  
"Aw, you're just envious of her."  
"Idiot!"  
"Ow!!"  
The rest of the guys laughed at the unfortunate perv. I only sighed.

No wonder Haruhi thought all humans were a bunch of idiots. I looked at the window, trying to organize my thoughts. Why did Nagato-san suddenly acquire emotions? Wait, she had emotions already, that was already obvious to me. But now she was expressive... and what was that telepathy thing? Was it real?

Wait a minute! That's it! Telepathy! Maybe I can contact Nagato, she's a data entity life-form, after all!

{ Nagato, can you hear me? }  
{ Yes, I can hear you. }

Nagato's voice sounded like the normal emotionless Nagato I had always known, not like the upgraded version that I had the pleasure of talking to a few minutes ago.

{ What happened, why did you faint? }  
{ My system suffered an emotional shock due to the unexpected presence of Suzumiya Haruhi. I feared she might re-create the world when she saw us kissing. I'm sorry for this. It was my fault. }  
{ Don't say that! It was natural for you. Anyway, your kiss would make it worth it. }  
{ I understand your feelings, but that wouldn't be fair for my species. I'm still afraid of her. }  
{ Don't worry about Haruhi, I'm sure she'll understand you. }  
{ What makes you be so sure about it? }  
{ Because I trust her, and she loves you. She doesn't say so openly, but she cares a lot for you. You're also part of her 'family', remember? }

{ ...... }

{ Will you be Ok? Physically, I mean? }  
{ Yes, but I'm still afraid. This is illogical, instead of fearing her I should be grateful to her for upgrading my system. But I can't help it. }  
{ Wait, she's the one who upgraded you? }  
{ Yes. And yet, I fear for my life and my species. }  
{ Nagato, can't you see? If she upgraded you it's because she cares for you! Don't worry, everything will be fine. Besides, Asahina-sensei is with her to help her calm down. }  
{ I'm aware of my surroundings. Wait... emotional subsystem is restarting... done. }

{ Kyon... I'm scared! }  
Now, that sounded like the new Nagato. Hearing her telling me she was scared made me feel like hugging her right now. She continued transmitting her thoughts to my mind:  
{ I'm awake now, but I'm afraid of opening my eyes. }  
{ Calm down, Nagato. Just talk to her already. This way you won't have to fear her anymore. Good luck, you can do it! }

I imagined myself giving Nagato a good luck hug. Somehow, I felt as if she was smiling. She spoke again.

{ Thanks for the hug. }

Whoa, can we do that, too? Nevermind. { You're welcome }, I 'said'.  
{ I'm opening my eyes now. }  
{ Good luck! }  
Nagato 'smiled' again, but I knew she was still worried.  
CONNECTION CLOSED.

I closed my eyes and sighed. My sigh called the attention of Taniguchi who was standing nearby.

"Hey, Kyon! Don't tell me you're in love with the new teacher already?"  
"Eh?"  
"Have you seen the new teacher?"  
"No... why do you ask?"  
"You just sighed as if you were in love! Don't tell me you finally fell in Suzumiya-san's cobweb?"  
"Haruhi? Don't make me laugh! If I were in love with someone, it would be with -"

The image of Nagato v2.0 smiling at me invaded my thoughts. No. Could it be possible? I lost my focus and Taniguchi's voice faded behind my thoughts. Would I be falling in love with Nagato-san? No! wait! That's not what I tried to tell her when I said I loved her! I wasn't crazy for her, I CARED for her! I just wanted her to be happy! And yet... her smile was something that I couldn't forget. Was I falling in love with Nagato? I shook my head mildly in disbelief.  
"Kyon! Kyon... are you awake?"  
"Eh?"  
"Oh, you're in love with someone else, right?" he said, grinning. He prepared to make a big announcement. Wait! Not in Haruhi's classroom!  
"HEY GUYS, GUESS -"

I quickly stood up and covered Taniguchi's mouth with my hand. "Taniguchi, if you utter a single word about this, I'm dead!"  
I made a disgusted face and pointed with my thumb towards the seat behind me. Haruhi's seat.  
Taniguchi gasped slowly, understanding the situation. "Ah.... I get it! Wait a minute, do you mean she's into you?"  
"Yes!!" i whispered. "And trust me, she's the kind of person that could destroy the whole world if she ever gets jealous. Who knows if she would suddenly get a combat knife and go berserk on me!" (Asakura-san, thanks for the inspiration)  
"Impossible! I always thought she was crazy, but never thought she could go psycho on you! Man!! We're in the same class! Don't scare me!"  
Just to make him know I was serious, I added: "And she's the king of girl that shoots the messenger", I said, patting his shoulder.  
"Kyon, don't say that!! You're freaking me out, man!"  
"Taniguchi, can I count on you? My life rests in your hands!" (And everybody's lives, for that matter)  
"Okay!" she said, smiling, winking and making a "thumbs up" gesture. "My lips are sealed!"

He sat down and stretched his arms. "Ah, I'm getting bored! When's the new teacher appearing?"  
And as if the teachers had heard his prayers, the classroom door opened. The principal walked in, and all of us stood up.

"Good morning, class!"  
"Good morning, sir!"  
"I have some important news. As you've probably heard, our History teacher had to move out to another city due to reasons beyond our control, so we've recruited a new History teacher for the school. I'll leave you with her. Take care."  
"Yes, sir!", all said at once.  
The principal walked to the entrance to discuss a few things with the new History teacher, who was hiding behind the door - probably using it as some kind of invisibility cloak to protect herself from this tribe of _homo erectus_ in heat. While the rest of the class sat down, in expectation, they were licking their lips like the big bad wolf waiting for little Red to enter Granny's house. Oh, chill out, will ya! It's not like the teacher is... Asahina-sensei!?!?

Oh... that explains it. Wait, why are you working in our school?

"Hello, class! My name is..." (she began writing her name on the blackboard) "... Asahina... Miyuki... sensei. Nice to meet you", she said, bowing.

Not paying the slightest attention to the hungry wolves around me drooling all over, I perfectly understood their reaction. Asahina-sensei's smile was so warming that Al Gore would place a restraining order against her in case she ever approached the polar ice caps. I speak from experience, but after what I lived today, I think I've become immune to Asahina-sensei's charms. See, a goddess has kissed me! What else could I ask for? I almost chuckled for a second. Wait... does that mean I'm really falling in love with Nagato? No! ...or yes?

I couldn't stop thinking about that smile, that blush, and that thought: "I love you." I had to be interrupted by Asahina-sensei to come back to my senses.

"Ah, I see a familiar face around! Hello, kyon-kun! How've you been?" she said, waving and smiling at me.

And with the speed of a cluster of protons inside CERN's particle accelerator, all the male seats screeched in a sound that could be compared to the eruption of Mt. Vesuvius. Yes, it was an eruption, indeed, as I could literally see the smoke and sparks coming out of my schoolmates' noses and eyes, respectively. All looking at me with the fury of Godzilla. Back off, you damn dirty apes! BACK OFF!

When the class finished and the teacher left (not before signing some autographs for the walking testosterone vessels), the remaining boys in the classroom surrounded me, demanding an explanation.

"So, Kyon, don't you have anything to tell us?" said Taniguchi.  
What is this, the Spanish Inquisition? Yare, yare. Let's see how they react after this answer.  
"Well", I said, standing up pompously, "what happens is that she's expecting my child and came to tell me that it's going to be a girl."  
Recognizing my obvious sarcasm, everybody laughed at my comment.  
"No, seriously, Kyon." said Taniguchi, pretending to punch shoulder Where do you know her from?"  
"Alright", I said, seriously. "She's Asahina-san's elder sister, it was only matter of time that we met. You could say it was a.... predetermined event in time."

The angry/curious mob calmed down, saying "Oh, right!", "Why didn't I think of that?" "I had forgotten!" and similar phrases.  
"Ah, I understand you now, Kyon!" said Taniguchi. "You're a lucky guy! Especially now that Suzumiya-san wasn't present in here."

"Why shouldn't I be present!" said Haruhi, who entered the classroom as if she was Clint Eastwood entering a western movie tavern. I could even imagine the desert bushes rolling behind her.  
"AH! Hello, Suzumiya-san... nice... too see you again... GOODBYE!"

The male crowd around me vanished as if they had been exorcised by a powerful priest.  
"Hmph. Idiot. What was all that about?"  
"Ah, you know... lust-overloaded schoolmates."  
"Idiots. Hey, speaking of lust..."she said with an evil grin on her face, "what were you doing to Yuki when I found you, eh?"

Gulp!

"Well, you see -"

Haruhi didn't even let me start my explanation. "Kyon, we need to talk. NOW!".

* * *

Haruhi grabbed me by the tie, as she would always do, and ran towards the brigade room. She threw me to the table, closed the door and locked it. Wait, locked it!? Damn, Haruhi, what are you going to do!

I turned around. Nobody's here! Double damn! Mother... father... I didn't have the time to write my will. Please take care of my ashes.

Haruhi took a deep breath, and began to speak.  
"Kyon. I need to be sincere with you."  
"Sincere? About... what?"  
She looked down... and sighed. "You were right, Kyon. I was jealous of Yuki."  
"Haruhi, what are you... talking about?"  
Haruhi clenched both of her fists and looked at me with a face so angry that it reminded me of the numerous Oni sculptures decorating Shinto temples. I had never seen Haruhi this angry before.  
"ARE YOU THAT STUPID?" she shouted. "WHY ELSE WOULD I FEEL JEALOUS, YOU DUMBASS! I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU!"

It happened too fast. Suddenly, I had her face so close to mine that I could distinguish the smallest wrinkle in her eyelids. I heard a thud coming from the table below me (that thud was my head), and Haruhi kissed me.

She quickly stood up, and turned around to face the door. I could clearly see the blush in her cheeks from behind. Great, just what I needed.

"Wait, what happened with all that 'love is a disease' stuff you said when you met me?"  
"I know, I know!"  
"When did you find out?"  
"I think it started a year ago... I had a dream where you kissed me... and there were all these weird things going on, very fun and interesting things, so interesting that I didn't care about the brigade anymore... but... I preferred the kiss over the fun stuff."

I didn't answer to see if she had anything more to say.

"Then I realized you were the first non-boring person I had ever met. I thought, 'I want to be with him for all my life'. But it wasn't until you fell down those stairs, that I realized I couldn't live without you. And seeing Yuki take care of you and not panic, that I thought maybe she could take care of you much more than I could... and now..."

Uh-oh. Her voice is beginning to break.

"Yuki needs you right now... and... I can't just do this to her... Not after she's starting to get healed..."  
"Haruhi..."

She turned around again, and her eyes began to leak.  
"It's not fair... you know..." She was really crying now. "...just when things were going perfect for all of us..."

She kissed me again, and suddenly I had been sandwiched between Haruhi and the table below me. My body was showing mixed reactions all over. I got scared, sad, and aroused at the same time (Haruhi's breasts weren't tiny, you know). Haruhi stopped kissing me, but she kept holding my face, and some tears fell on my lips. They were tears, alright, they tasted salty.

Haruhi took a seat and reclined her head on the table. As I saw her sit down, I remembered that I never understood why anime shows always depicted love triangles as funny. This is not funny! It's uncomfortable as hell!

"It's not fair..." she said.  
"No, it isn't. Life isn't fair."

"It's so ironic..." said Haruhi, wiping her tears. "Yesterday I got a letter from my uncle... he told me... that I had zero tolerance to failure... I wished I could get an opportunity to improve... but... I never expected something like this... I love you, and I love Yuki, too! I want you to be happy... but then... I never asked for this! It's too much!"

I may sound partial in here because I'm one of the involved parties, but don't you think this is part of human nature? No, I'm wrong. I shouldn't be thinking this.  
"Haruhi, you're my friend, and so is Nagato-san! When you're having adventures in the brigade, I have to confess you something."

"DON'T YOU DARE! Don't you dare confessing me your love! Not with Yuki around..."  
"No, it's something else! Haruhi... When you were playing baseball, and whenever you had a great idea, or when we had that picnic disguised as a mystery digging... you always showed a million watt smile. I don't want you to lose that smile..."  
"Stop it! I don't want to fall even more in love with you! It hurts too much already!"

Damn it, what's happening? She wasn't supposed to feel jealous, that's why I wrote the letter, right?

Haruhi stood up and walked to her desk. She grabbed the "Chief Commander" badge that was on her desk and looked at it. "It's not fair... dammit... I was having so much fun, you know? Saving the world... by overloading it with fun... why does this feel so useless right now? WHY!

Haruhi was about to smash her little pyramidal badge against the wall.

"Haruhi, what are you doing!!" I shouted, while grabbing her from behind. "You're throwing everything overboard for a stupid romance!?"  
"What use is it! It's worthless! It's just a damn piece of plastic! "  
"Don't! Give me that!"  
"Let me go!!"  
After a short struggle, I finally got it from her.

Haruhi crouched on the wall. "What use is a Brigade Commander... if she can't control her own emotions... Kyon... you can keep the brigade... I'm not worthy of it..."

I had to calm her down. as Haruhi was able to have a million watt smile, she was also able to have a million watt frown. It was as if anyone could get a full month depression just by looking at her.

"Haruhi, don't do that.... I don't have the guts to be a commander! It's hard enough to follow your orders! So, this is your first failure. So? Will you let that stop you? We need you! All of us! And what about the people you helped with the brigade? What about that unforgettable concert with Yuki? Dammit, is it that wrong to admit that sometimes you need help too? Why don't you ask for help! Why do you have to carry all the responsibilities! Why do you keep acting like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders! Why not just take a two weeks vacation or until you feel better? Why don't you ask for the help of Asahina-sensei? Haruhi, you're a human being! You have defects, everybody does! Even if you had the power of a god, you can't expect to always be perfect! If you quit now, what example will you leave to the future generations?"

Haruhi looked at me. I offered her the badge, and she looked at it. She then looked at the ceiling, and still crying, she spoke. "Kei-kun, where are you where I need you?" she said. "Can't you just appear right now, dammit!?"  
"Haruhi, who's"  
"Just shut up..." she shouted angrily at me.

Quick, Kyon, think of something! Would this be the time to use the trump card? Or maybe... not quite?

"Haruhi, I just remembered!"  
"What?" she asked, without moving her head.  
"Well, I don't know if it'll help, but some guy gave me a phone call before going to school. At first I thought it was a prank, but maybe it's not... he told me he was your uncle John."

Ding! That seemed to make Haruhi come to her senses.  
"Uncle John? WHAT DID HE SAY!"  
"It was weird. He told me that tonight he would show you evidence of time travel. At first I thought it was a prank, but I planned to tell you anyway at today's meeting. He also told me you should remember your lessons and your mission."

Haruhi wiped her tears and stood up. Ah, that's it! That's the Haruhi I know!

"Kyon, I need you to do me a favor."  
"What is it?" I said, standing up, too. "Anything!"  
"Punch me as hard as you can."  
"WHAT?"  
"Just do it, dammit!"  
"But why?"  
"JUST DO IT! IT'S AN ORDER!"

Well, orders are orders.  
"Dammit, Haruhi, why are you asking me this all of a sudden?"  
"HURRY UP!"  
"Okay, Okay!"

I hesitated. I clenched my fist. Was this right? I shouldn't hit a girl, much less Haruhi.  
"JUST DO IT OR I'LL BREAK MY BADGE ON YOUR FACE!"

Cornered with the excuse of self-defense, I had no choice but to punch Haruhi as hard as I could in the stomach, making her fall to the floor and gasp for air. (I didn't have the guts to punch her in the face. That would be too much).

I waited until she got better, and offered her my hand. "Feeling better now?"  
Haruhi stared at me with a gaze so terrifying that it would make the bravest hero run screaming in terror. Let me put it this way: Have you ever heard the term "angry god"?  
I stepped back, instinctively fearing for my life. "Hey, wait a minute! You ordered me!"  
Haruhi used the wall behind her to get a jump start, and punched me in the stomach, to then kick me in my vulnerable spot. Twice.  
"That makes it even." she said, sitting down against the wall again.

"Now leave me alone. I need time to think."  
That's much easier to be said than done!  
"Hurry up!"  
I crawled to the door with the movements of a twitching earthworm, and managed to get the strength to stand up. Well, at least I knew that bossing me around meant that Haruhi was feeling at least a bit better. Perhaps that kick in the crotch was her revenge for feeling sexually betrayed. I began to understand the true meaning behind the phrase "sacrifice to calm the gods' wrath". Ow, my balls. Ow.

Ow...

Ow.

I got out just as I saw Koizumi approaching.  
"Koizumi, I don't think it's a good idea to..."  
"Right now I'm not Koizumi. I'm K-kun."  
"Oh."

Koizumi knocked the door.

"Suzumiya-san, we need to talk."  
"Leave me alone..."  
"But you called for me!"  
"No, I did not! Go away!"  
"I'm K-kun! I've been the one comforting you all this time! Open up, please!"

Haruhi didn't answer.

"Suzumiya-san, open up, please! Uncle John sent me!"

As if awakened by some magic words, the door was opened in less than a second.

"Please repeat what you said!"  
Koizumi whispered to Haruhi, but I could perfectly hear what he said.  
"I'm K-kun. The esper. Uncle John sent me."  
Haruhi hesitated. "I don't believe it... you? The same one who has been comforting me all the time?"  
Koizumi hugged Haruhi and closed his eyes. "Recognize me now?"  
Haruhi immediately hugged Koizumi and began to cry on his shoulders. "It's not fair! It's not fair! It's not fair..."

I remembered the other time she cried on someone else's shoulders. That was yesterday, with Asahina-sensei. I quickly walked away and let Koizumi deal with Haruhi. Well, I guess my labor's finished for now. After all, I still had a long day before me.

Sigh. Poor Haruhi. Yesterday she cried in the morning, and in the evening. And now she was crying again. Just how many emotions did you keep to yourself, Haruhi? I sighed again, shaking my head. I could have said 'I told you', or 'You did this to yourself', but come on, it's not her fault she fell in love, either! And how could I judge an inexperienced teenager who has been in love but just once? With me? After feeling lonely for at least 4 years?

I realized that she wasn't that different from Nagato. Both of them hiding their feelings out of fear. But that can't go on forever, can it?

Sigh.

As I was slowly walking to my classroom (VEEEERY slooooowly) , I heard a voice calling me from behind.

"Kyon-kun..."  
I turned around. "Asahina-sensei!"  
"Congratulations, you did well."  
I pointed behind, at the brigade room. "Well If this is your idea of well, I don't want to know how 'bad' is."  
"Don't feel like that, Kyon-kun. She's just getting out all that she had inside. Soon she'll feel better, thanks to you, and thanks to K-kun."  
"But, I thought my letter would make her not get jealous."  
"We checked your letter, it was perfect."  
"You did?"  
"Yes. I suppose it wasn't your first attempt, am I right?"  
"How did you know?"

Asahina-sensei began walking towards my classroom. "We detected various time quakes around you and Haruhi-chan when you were writing that letter."  
"Asahina-sensei, that's how you rehearsed your talk with Haruhi yesterday, right? Through various iterations in time?"  
"That's right, Kyon-kun. You've learned a lot! You would make a wonderful time traveler."  
Thanks for the compliment, but that doesn't make me less worried about Haruhi and Nagato.  
"How is Nagato?"  
"She's fine. But I didn't come here for her."  
"You didn't?"  
"No. I came here to help Haruhi-chan to deal with her emotions. She needs a mother, after all. Did you know she lives alone?"  
"No..."  
"Have you wondered why she never tells you about her family?"  
"Well, she told me something about her parents in the past."  
"But not in the present. She lives alone. Right now she needs a mother. By the way, I have to thank you for making the younger me help Nagato-san yesterday. That was the turning point that turned me into who I am right now."  
"I see..."  
"Perhaps you haven't noticed, Kyon-kun. But the situation right now is completely different to when she got jealous of me... I mean, of Mikuru-chan. That first time, her love for you was completely selfish. But now she's changing. She's maturing. She has already given up on you because she wants you to be happy."  
Asahina-sensei, I don't believe what you're telling me. Is this real?  
"Don't worry, Kyon-kun. With the help of John Smith, K-kun and me, she'll be feeling much better. She just needs some time now. Well, I'll be around if you need me. Now hurry up to your class."  
"Okay."

She turned around. As she was leaving, I began to think of Asahina-san. Wait, won't that cause a major paradox or something? "Wait!"

She turned around again.  
"What about Asahina-san!" I shouted.  
She elegantly ran back. "You don't have to worry about her. After all, I do remember seeing myself in here. It's predetermined."  
"Ah... I see."

"Well, I have to go now. See ya!" she said, winking at me.

It was nearly time for the next class. I wondered if Nagato was fine.  
{ Nagato? }  
{ I'm here. }

That was the upgraded Nagato, alright. Things were going well.

{ Are you Ok? }  
{ I'm feeling better now. You were right, I only needed to talk to Suzumiya-san. I feel a great relief, thank you. }  
{ I'm so glad. What did you tell her? }  
{ That it was my fault. But she said that she would try not to get jealous, and that she wanted me to be happy. Then we spoke of many other things that she asked me not to tell you. Did she talk to you ? }  
{ Yes, she finally confessed. } I sighed. { I never thought this day would come. }  
{ This is definitely some progress. So far she had never been eager to admit her own feelings. The Integrated Data Sentient Entity believes that this period of instability in her emotions will be followed by a period of greater stabilization. This is an important landmark. But somehow, I still feel sorry for her. I have more things to tell you, but we'll have time later. }  
{ Okay. }  
{ I never imagined humans would be capable of overcoming so many obstacles. Indeed, the human mind contains mysteries whose existence couldn't be possibly imagined by us. Anyway... thank you for all that you've done for me. I really appreciate it. }  
Hey, that sounds like a goodbye!  
{ Sorry, I didn't mean to make it sound like that. }  
{ I'm glad to hear that. I have to go now. }  
{ Bye. I love you. }

I tried to hide my blush. That felt so good. I wondered what would happen later: The movie projection, Nagato, Haruhi... Koizumi... Haruhi realizing that time travel was real... Maybe this wouldn't be a bad day at all.

(End of chapter 8)

* * *

**Author's notes.**

Please review!

**About the Title:**

The title of this chapter is "The Apocalypse of Suzumiya Haruhi" because it refers to the end of her selfish love for Kyon. It also refers to the potential end-of-the-world situation, but more importantly, it refers to Haruhi's revelations. The literal meaning of "Apocalypse", is after all, "revelation".

**About the Telepathy:**

The explanation for the telepathy between Nagato and Kyon relies on a subconscious wish of Haruhi. She wants Kyon and Yuki to be happy, but she feels threatened if she sees them together. So letting them express their feelings in a way that she has no access to, is the best choice. More will be explored in later chapters.


	9. The resolution of Suzumiya Haruhi

**Chapter 9.  
The resolution of Suzumiya Haruhi**

During the rest of the day, Haruhi kept staring at the window. Melancholy had already hit her again. I could hear her sigh every once in a while. I also sighed. I just wanted this nightmare to be over.

The classes finished, and everybody left the classroom. Everybody but Haruhi and me (I had expected her to leave first, but she wouldn't).  
"Kyon..."  
I turned around. "Yes?"

Haruhi did not turn around. I knew perfectly that she wanted to avoid eye contact, so I looked at the window again and waited for her to talk first.

"Do you think I'll find someone who will love me?"

I didn't know the answer, but I wanted her to be with someone. Knowing that Koizumi already liked Haruhi, I mentioned him.  
"What about Koizumi?"

She sighed again. "I don't know... it's just that he kept all those secrets from me, and I really don't know what to feel about it."  
"What secrets?"

She sighed again. "Remember the 'uncle John' that called you this morning? That kind of secrets."

I thought about the lie that I had told her – well, technically, it wasn't a lie, as I can call myself any time. And telepathically, for that matter!. I needed to act surprised.  
"Wait... do you mean time travel is ACTUALLY possible?"

"I hope so. You know what I'd do if I could travel back in time?"

"What?"

"I could've told myself not to fall in love with you."

Oh, dear, here we go again. I felt as if we were in that eternal august, living the same experience like a scratched disk.

"Oy, Haruhi, don't you think that if you could travel back in time and erase all your bad experiences, wouldn't you turn into a much worse person that you are right now? I mean, how well-trained is a warrior that has never lost a battle? I think bad experiences are necessary to grow up, don't you think?"

Haruhi reclined her head against the desk. "It's just that they hurt so much..."

"Well, if it makes you feel any better, I was very disappointed when Asahina-san told me she couldn't go out on a date with me. So all I did was enjoying her curves and getting depressed because she was a prize I could never get. But know what? In the end, I won four friends. That's something that I really appreciate. You know the proverb, "Luck exists in the leftovers".

Haruhi sighed again.  
"I guess you're right."  
"Look at it this way, didn't our biology teacher tell us that love was just the manifestation of chemical reactions in our brain? So maybe you just need to do some exercise or something."

Haruhi looked at me, and her eyes looked like the ones of a puppy expecting to be adopted.  
"Hey, don't look at me like that!"

Haruhi stood up, annoyed. But I think she was more annoyed at herself than at me.  
"This sucks! I can't even have a conversation with you without feeling something for you!"

Haruhi took her schoolbag and walked to the classroom door.

"Haruhi, where are you going?"  
"To the brigade room, where else?"

Time to go.

* * *

We arrived to the brigade room. Nagato was reading a book, as usual. Asahina-san was already wearing her maid outfit, while Koizumi was playing Mahjong Solitaire, and Asahina-sensei was there! Asahina-sensei, what are you doing in the brigade room?

Haruhi let me in, and closed the door.

"EVERYONE, I NEED TO MAKE AN ANNOUNCEMENT. Kyon, sit down. Yuki, mind sitting down at the table? I need you to hear this, too."

I sat down, not having the slightest idea of what Haruhi was gonna say.

Haruhi took a deep breath.

"I want to apologize. I've given you a lot of troubles, lately, and I've been interfering with your personal life..."

Well. So far, so good.

"So, I'll try to be more open to you, but I need you to be more open with me." She took a deep breath again, and spoke. "Well, here's my confession. I'm in love with Kyon. But... I don't want Yuki to feel lonely, especially after recovering from her illness... but I need a favor!"

The ambient began getting tense. "Yuki, you can keep Kyon for a while... I won't interfere, but would you mind... not showing your affection for him while I'm present?" Haruhi looked down. "It hurts too much... anyway. This takes me to my second announcement."

Now what?

"For the following month, there won't be any brigade activities until further notice. It's a long story, and I'm not in the mood to explain right now."

Koizumi raised his hand.

"Suzumiya-san... may I share my opinion?"

Haruhi sat down on her brigade commander's chair. "Okay, you may speak now."

Koizumi stood up. "I also have to make an announcement. The main reason I joined the brigade was to help Suzumiya-san deal with her emotions. Perhaps many of you don't know this, but I am an Esper...

Asahina-sensei, who was sitting at my right, gave me a nudge. I understood that I should appear impressed.  
I stood up. "Wait a second. Koizumi, you're an esper?"  
"Yes, that's what I said. In a later session we can discuss about my powers, but right now I'd like to talk about something more personal."  
I sat down.

"The main use I have given to my powers is to help Suzumiya-san deal with her emotions and problems. But, today I realized that there's a much deeper reason for me to be here."

Koizumi walked to Haruhi. "Suzumiya-san, mind standing up for a moment?"

"What... are you going to do?"  
"Please?", he said, smiling.  
Haruhi stood up. "What?"

After Haruhi stood up, Koizumi made his announcement. "The truth is, that I've been falling in love with Suzumiya-san. Suzumiya-san, I would like you to be my girlfriend."

I was surprised. Shocked. Petrified. Amazed. Was this really happening?

"Koizumi-kun..." answered Haruhi, confused. "I... I don't know, this is too sudden..."

And then we got surprised again, because Koizumi took the initiative and kissed her.

With her eyes closed, Haruhi frowned and began to cry silently, without breaking the kiss. Not wanting to interrupt them, I turned my eyes to the other members of the brigade, noticing that Nagato was blushing and looking down at the table. She noticed my look, and she blushed even more.

{ Don't look at me... }  
{ Sorry. }

Ah, how I loved seeing her blushing!

{ I heard that! } she "told me", while she blushed even more. She turned around so I wouldn't be able to look at her face. Bummer.

The kiss ended. "Suzumiya-san," said Koizumi, "I'll wait for your answer. But I needed to share my feelings for you."  
"O... OK..."

Haruhi walked to the blackboard again, blushing, when she noticed all of us were staring at her. "WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT? It's perfectly normal for a teenager to express his feelings! Aaaaaaanyway. As I was saying, we need to be more open about our feelings to avoid reaching critical situations in the future."

Haruhi pointed at Nagato with her ace detective finger, and said:  
"Yuki, if you have another problem, you'll need to share it with us. So, do you have anything to share?"

Nagato got nervous. She began to blush, and stood up. "Um... I... I also need to share this. I'm... I'm sorry, I'm very sorry for all the problems that I've caused you all, it's my fault... and... yes, I've fallen in love with Kyon...  
But I promise you I'll do my best not to get you jealous... but I also have to thank you for caring for me."

Nagato ran towards Haruhi and gave her a big emotional hug.  
"Thank you!" she shouted. "Thank you for everything you've done for me! Especially today... I was never able to share my feelings until now, and it's because you wished for me to improve that I could get better... thank you!"

We were all amazed to see the new Nagato v2.0 express her emotions in such a moving way. But what she said next would shock us all.

"I... I also have another confession to make... but I don't know if it's the right time...."

Nagato looked at Asahina-sensei, who nodded at her.

"Suzumiya-san... you may want to sit down before I share this..."

Nagato began rubbing her fingers. Aw, she looked so adorable. I had feared for a moment that her new personality would be radically different from the one she showed me in the alternate world. But she was the same, and I was glad for that.

Haruhi sat down. "Go on, Yuki."  
"Um... I've been hiding this from you since we met...but, there was a very specific reason for not being able to share my emotions... well, actually I didn't know I would have emotions..."

Nagato looked down at the floor, when Asahina-sensei spoke. "Take your time, Nagato-san. You don't need to say it if you don't want to."

"Thanks..... Suzumiya-san, I need to tell you this, because I already know you consider me your friend. Before I met you, I was afraid of telling this secret about myself because I was afraid of what might happen to me and... my... _family_... if you found out about my secret."  
"Yuki... Sensei already told me about you, your secret is safe."  
"You're wrong. What Asahina-sensei showed you was just a... cover-up. But I'm scared of telling you the truth... and I also want to apologize..."

I noticed that Nagato was shivering in fear and/or nervousness. I sent her a telepathic hug to make her feel better.

{ Thanks. } Nagato sighed.

"I also want to apologize, because I've already shared it with the other brigade members. I'm sorry, I was just too scared of you, and my... _family_ told me that I shouldn't share this with you. **Especially **with you, because they don't fully trust you yet.

Haruhi stood up and asked. "Yuki, by any chance are you trying to tell me that you're an android from the future, or something?"  
"Actually..."

Nagato took a deep breath. Then she looked again at Asahina-sensei, who nodded at Nagato.

Nagato clenched her fists, and still looking down, she got it out.  
"I'm an alien. When I mentioned my family, I was talking about my race. I'm sorry I never told you! And the reason I joined the SOS brigade was because we need your help to survive in the long term."

Haruhi stood still, like a statue, while Nagato continued.  
"I'm sorry for keeping this a secret. Will you still accept me as a friend?"

Nagato was trembling. She was scared. Nagato, why did you take the decision to tell Haruhi, of all the possible days, today?

Haruhi opened her mouth three or four times, while shaking her head in denial.  
"Yuki... I... I... are you serious? Is this a prank you're playing on me? Do you want to get even at me for all what I did to you? I already said I'm sorry! But please, don't do this to me!"

Nagato took a chalk and began to draw on the blackboard. "Maybe... you will believe me if I write this in your secret language...."

Nagato wrote a pictograph. The symbols looked like the symbols that Haruhi made me draw four years ago on that sports field. But they had a different order and orientation, and there were other symbols that I hadn't seen.

"Nagato", I said, "what are you drawing?"  
"I can't tell you. This is only a secret between me and Suzumiya-san." But telepathically, she told me:  
{ It's the answer that Suzumiya-san expected to appear in crop fields after she sent her message four years ago. }

Haruhi took her palm to her mouth and shook her head. "I... I can't... how do you know this?"

"The species which I belong to are data-based lifeforms which do not possess physical bodies. My boss created a physical body for me so that I could interact with you. As data-based life forms, we acquire and manipulate the existing data in the universe. Your message was received and understood in the same instant that you wrote it. Four years ago, you and your friend."

Haruhi sat down in awe, while Nagato turned around, and continued her explanation.

"The reason I've been so afraid, is that our race is very sensitive to data. We noticed that you had powers that could preserve or destroy us all if you wanted to. This is why I got so so scared of you. I feared that you would exterminate us if you got angry at me for falling in love with Kyon... I feared..."

Nagato started trembling, and her eyes got wet. " I feared it every night... the survival of my race depended on asking for your help... and... I almost ruined it once... and then... I began having these nightmares where you got jealous of me, and angry at me... and in those nightmares you used your powers to kill us all... and... and... "

The tears began to flow. Oh, God, Nagato, don't cry... you're breaking my heart!

"I got so scared... and I couldn't show my emotions... but I kept having those nightmares every night... "

Nagato's voice began increasing in volume, and now she wasn't just talking. She was shouting and crying.

"...**corrupting my data... every single night...** **and I tried to delete them, but nothing worked... they kept infecting me, crashing my system, OVER and OVER! Not even Kimidori-san could help me... and... the nightmares ****went on... and then... you broke into one of them... and... today you saw us kissing... and I... I... "**

Nagato fell on her knees, covering her face with her both hands. She was sobbing so hard that the words couldn't come out anymore. It was obvious by now that she just couldn't resist any longer, and you know what? Neither could I. Everything began to look blurry. The tears didn't let me see, and they would keep coming out. Dammit, Kyon, you're a man. You're supposed to be strong! Stop crying, dammit! Stop crying! Why does this hurt so bad!?

A female hand gave me a handkerchief and I wiped my tears on it. Someone hugged me from behind. I don't remember if it was Asahina-san or Asahina-sensei. She said, "It's alright, Kyon-kun, the worst is over now. It's alright." I just felt so sorry for Nagato. Dammit, I had never seen her crying like that! Dammit, why does this hurt so much!

When I finished crying, I opened my eyes and saw Haruhi and Nagato on the floor, hugging each other. Nagato had finished crying, too.

"Yuki..."  
Nagato sniffed and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.. "Yes?"  
"I promise I won't hurt you or anyone of your race. If you need any help from me, just tell me, OK?"  
"You promise?"  
"I promise! And I'll train really hard to control my own emotions. As the commander of the SOS brigade, I make it an oath!"

Nagato hugged Haruhi as hard as she could. "Thank you... thank you!"

After they finished hugging, Haruhi stood up and approached me. I wiped the rest of my tears. "Sorry", I said. "This doesn't happen to me often."

"Kyon, get up. GET UP, DAMMIT!"

I came to my senses and stood up. What was she up to?

"Close your eyes."  
"What?"  
"Close your eyes! NOW!"

I closed my eyes. What was Haruhi trying to do now?

"DON'T OPEN THEM UNTIL I TELL YOU."  
"Haruhi, what are you"  
"SHUT UP!"

The suspense was killing me, but I heard some whispering. What was she trying to do?

"Haru - "  
"SHUT UP!"

Four or five seconds later, my lips felt a kiss. Haruhi, what the hell?!

{ It's me. }  
{ Nagato? }

I felt Nagato's arms wrap around my back. I recognized her small hands. I immediately hugged her. I heard everyone around applauding. I opened my eyes, and realized that Nagato was kneeling on the table. Asahina-san kept wiping the tears off her face, but they would return. Koizumi was showing his trademark smile, while Haruhi was applauding at us. Her expression confused me. She looked sad and happy at the same time. But she also was applauding. Yes, that's Haruhi. Always with an instant plan to save the day. Just add water.

I looked at Nagato, and oh my great goddess Nagato! You have a million watt smile!

Nagato hugged me again, and rested her head against my chest, closing her eyes. Her sweet eyes. I heard Asahina-san and Asahina-sensei say "aww" in chorus.

I didn't understand. If Haruhi was so jealous of us, why was she helping us?  
"Wait a minute, Haruhi, don't you feel jealous?"

Haruhi stared at me with her evil eyes. "Does that matter to you? What I feel is my own god-damn business! Anyway. I'm tired of crying", she said. "Let's go watch a movie in the projection room! The snacks are on the house!"

While Haruhi was preparing everything, Nagato spoke to me.

"Thank you for crying for me."  
"You're welcome. But after hearing you cry like that, I couldn't just stop."  
"It's not that. You took some of my pain and made it yours. I never thought that would be possible. How did you do that?"  
"I don't know... I'm just glad you're OK."

Nagato hugged me. I caressed her head with my left hand. "Feeling better now?"

She looked at me and nodded, while smiling.

The preparations were ready. Haruhi split the whole team in three using, as usual, straws. But I noticed that she waved her hand on the straws before starting. Practicing your ESP powers, eh? "Luck" determined that Nagato and I would be in the back of the projection room, and the rest would be in the front. Haruhi smiled like a child who had just learned to do a magic trick. She really was enjoying learning how to use her powers.

Nagato cuddled with me. There was no need to be afraid anymore. God, she looked so happy.

I noticed that Haruhi was cuddling with Koizumi. And Asahina-san was sitting next to Asahina-sensei.

The movie was actually very good, and the later parts kept me on the edge of my seat. Overall, I understood more about time travel. Ah, so that's it! That's what Asahina-sensei wanted to tell Haruhi! By the way, I need to write the next letter for Haruhi, or she's gonna get pissed. Maybe I'll just send her letter, and staple it to a small piece of paper that says: "Please consult with Asahina-sensei if you got any questions. Have you purchased the safe box yet?"

Yes, that's what I'm going to write.

But finally, I was glad that Nagato didn't need to fear Haruhi anymore. She was happy, and at peace. And just that thought, made me happy.

(End of chapter 9)


	10. The silence of Suzumiya Haruhi

**Chapter 10.  
The silence of Suzumiya Haruhi.**

"Alright, the movie's finished! See ya tomorrow!" shouted Haruhi. She turned on the lights, and without saying anything more, she picked up the movie, and began to work on leaving the projection room clean. I was approached by Asahina-sensei.

"Kyon-kun... sorry for the hurry, but we have to leave soon. Haruhi-chan will get a cab for us. Please take care."  
"Okay."

At that moment, Haruhi ran towards us. She stretched, and shouted, smiling: "Ah, what a great movie! What do you think, Kyon! This movie will definitely go into my sci-fi collection!"

Hey, since when do you have a sci-fi collection?

"Yuki, what did you think about the movie?"  
"The physics were inaccurate at some points, but overall it was very interesting. Thank you."

Ah, Nagato, don't you know what Science fiction means? Oh, wait. You do.

"Kyon", said Haruhi. "You were completely right. I was TOTALLY wrong! So, please make Yuki happy." Then, hugging Yuki from behind, she added: "She needs you much more than I do. Do you promise you'll take good care of her? Please?" she asked, still smiling.

Surprised by Haruhi's words, I couldn't say anything, so I nodded. Haruhi looked at Nagato at the eyes, and said:

"Yuki... I'm so sorry. I was too selfish... will you forgive me?"  
Nagato nodded.

"Well, I have to go, it's getting late. Bye, everyone! See you tomorrow!"

Haruhi looked very happy. I sighed in relief. The movie was a very good idea. Maybe her falling in love with me was just a phase. I smiled.

Haruhi and Sensei crossed the door and began to walk to the corridors.

Nagato pulled my sleeve.

"Yes?"  
"Her stress levels..."  
"What?"

Nagato looked down. "She's experiencing a lot of pain right now..."

No, don't tell me that, she looked so happy a few seconds ago! Does that mean that she was lying?

"Are you sure?"  
"She's about to burst in tears."

No, no. NO!! This can't be! This can't be! Haruhi, if you were about to cry, why did you smile so jovially?

I was in a complete state of denial. My mind was hiding from the truth like a snail hiding inside its shell.

I had to verify this with my own eyes. I managed to get a glimpse as they were walking away. I noticed that Haruhi wiped her face with her left arm. Her other hand was covering her face. Haruhi's shoulders trembled, an unequivocal sign. She was sobbing, no doubt. Sensei began patting Haruhi's shoulder and caressed her back with her palm.

No. No!! Not now when things were going so well! Dammit, Haruhi, just when I need you to be more honest, you blatantly lie? Why! Why! My God. Haruhi, why? Don't do this to me!

Sensei turned around and noticed that I was peeking outside the room. She made a gesture with her hand that told me to go back inside. I did and closed the door.

DAMMIT!

I couldn't restrain myself. I punched the wall as hard as I could.

{ STOP!! }

Surprised by Nagato's words in my mind, I quickly turned around. Kyon, you idiot, why did you have to punch the wall in front of her!?  
"What are you doing!" she shouted, hugging me.

I hugged her. I was so confused.  
"Sit down" she said. I had no choice but to comply. Haruhi, why did you lie to us? We could have understood! Don't you trust us? Then I looked at Nagato, caressing my hand, kissing it, asking me:  
"Why did you punch the wall?"  
"I'm sorry, but I'll be fine."

Looking at her, taking care of me, getting sad for me, made me realize the truth. Haruhi was sacrificing herself for our happiness.

I felt terribly sorry for Haruhi. At the same time, my admiration for her increased a hundred thousand times. After having her heart shattered like a glass sculpture under a steamroller, she still told us to be happy together. What can you say about that? What she did was beyond bravery. It was heroic. No, it was beyond heroic. The words of support that she gave us right now, made the combined deeds of Hercules, Jason and Odysseus look like throwing a dime to a beggar. There was just no comparison. I perfectly knew, beyond any possible doubt, that through that corridor was walking a hero. Dammit, why do I feel like crying again?

"Why did you do that?" asked Nagato.  
"I said I was sorry." I answered bluntly.  
"That's not what I asked. Why? I don't understand..."

I stared at Nagato. For a moment I had forgotten that she was an alien humanoid interface. She had feelings, but she was still a rookie.  
"You mean you really don't know why I did that?"

Nagato looked at me with a sad puppy face, and shook her head.

I sighed. "Let me see if I can explain to you... I got angry at Haruhi for not telling us the truth. But my... anger was because she was just hurting herself. I got angry at her, but I couldn't hurt her in retaliation, you know? Because she was the one being hurt in the first place. I felt so frustrated, and angry, and impotent... I mean, what do you feel when you see your best friend hurt himself?"

"Horrible", she said, caressing my wounded hand.

Oh, crap. I felt like a man who had just popped a kid's balloon. Kyon, you idiot... now not only Haruhi's hurt, you've hurt Nagato, too!? Nagato, I'm so sorry, forgive me!

"Would you like me to heal your hand?"  
"If that makes you happy, please go ahead. But I deserve the pain for being a jerk. I'm sorry."

Nagato put her hand above mine, and in an instant, the pain in my hand was gone. As good as new.

"Healing completed. But I'm still angry at you for doing that. What should I do?"  
"Smack me if you want. I deserve it."

Nagato thought about it for a second. "You're right. You deserve it!"

Before I could prepare myself for her smack, I was already falling down to the floor. Man! This girl could get in a world wide Karate tournament and get a special achievement medal for flawless victory! I looked above, and her face reminded me of my mother when I broke the dishes. No, don't look at me like that, please!

"DON'T DO THAT AGAIN." she commanded me. Oh, trust me. If you have feared an angry Haruhi, you don't want to get Nagato pissed. Just when I felt like my spirit would run away in fear, she crouched and caressed the cheek that she had just smacked. "Please don't do that again, it felt horrible."

Dammit, how do you compensate for that? I softly kissed her and hugged her. She was caressing my back again. Ah, the problems are melting away... ah, this feels like a rub of lidocaine on an scratched wound... please go on, please go on...

The kiss stopped, and now Nagato was reclining her head on my shoulder, still hugging me. She sighed.

"I'm sorry", I said.  
"Thanks..."  
"Feeling any better?"

Nagato looked at me, and smiling, she nodded.

I stood up, and realized that Koizumi and Asahina-san had been staring at us.

Then I remembered the start of this mess. Haruhi. I shivered for a moment thinking of what would happen to the world. Ah, there's Koizumi! I'm sure he can give me the supernatural weather report.

"Hey, Koizumi..."  
"Yes?"  
"Any closed spaces?"  
"Let me check."  
Koizumi made a quick phone call and after asking a few questions, he hung up. He looked both confused and surprised, as a child who had just been told that he was adopted. I walked to him. That worried me more. Just how many closed spaces appeared?

"Koizumi, what did they tell you?"  
"This is incredible.", he said, staring at me. "There aren't any."

What?

"No closed spaces have appeared."  
"Are you sure?"  
"Completely sure. Neither my partners nor I have detected any closed spaces. At least since the movie started, and the ones before are already gone."

I walked towards the front of the projection room, while Nagato followed me.

"Kyon... do you know why closed spaces appear?"  
"Yes, when Haruhi's emotions are unstable."  
"Well, that's the simple explanation. The truth is, that when Suzumiya-san feels unwelcome by this world, or the people in here, she feels the desire to recreate the world to one where she feels happy. And that's why closed spaces appear."  
"That sounds reasonable. But what does this mean in this case?"  
"It means", he said, after sighing, "that her desire for the supernatural won't calm down her pain. Or at least, she feels it's useless right now. Maybe because she already knows that there are no supernatural means for her to feel better. But that has a further consequence."  
"Which is?"

Koizumi's answer felt like a fingernail scratching against a blackboard.  
"That, unlike other cases, she's carrying all this pain by herself."

Koizumi sat down, and sighed. "As we talk, I'm comforting her emotionally as much as I can. To be honest, using my powers this way is ten times more exhausting than fighting avatars in closed space. But what I said in the meeting was true. I love her, and I don't care how exhausting this is, as long as she feels better."

I sighed. Poor Haruhi.

"Well, I'll take care of the projection room." said Koizumi. "You should go home now."

I knew I had to leave, and I hadn't eaten. But didn't want Nagato to feel lonely. And feeling the way I felt for Haruhi, I really didn't know if staying with Nagato was a good idea after all.

"Nagato, I have to go... would you like Asahina-san to make you company today?"  
"Yes."  
"Okay, go tell her."

I gave her a tight hug, and proceeded to go home.

* * *

After I finished my homework, I wrote the short letter for Haruhi and stapled her letter. Just to make sure she didn't screw up, I wrote on the back with a black marker: "Received" . I wanted to check her mail to see how she was doing, but I realized that Haruhi's letters would only talk about stuff interesting for her. She was probably having a bad time because of her feelings for me.

I wanted to call Asahina-sensei to check on Haruhi, but I didn't want to risk Haruhi overhearing. The letters, that's it! I'll ask Asahina-sensei to write me a letter about how Haruhi is doing. That would give me the answer instantly. I only had to make a call and later check the mail.

So I called Asahina-san, who was staying with Nagato.

"Hello?"  
"It's me."  
"Kyon-kun! How are you doing?"  
"I'm fine. How's Nagato?"  
"We've been talking a lot, Kyon-kun. She says she misses you. Oh, she wants to talk to you."

Nagato answered the phone. "Hello?"  
"Hello, Nagato. How are you doing?"  
"I missed you." I could notice from her voice that she was smiling. "I love you."  
"I love you too."

" …... "  
" … "

Damn. We're stuck in a lovers' phone call deadlock. Now, what should I say? I didn't want to interrupt her silence. Argh, I'm sorry, Nagato, but I'm in a kind of hurry.

"Um... Nagato, I need to talk to Asahina-san."  
"...... Okay. I love you."  
"I love you too."

"Hello? Kyon-kun?"  
"Asahina-san, I need a favor."  
"Yes, what is it, Kyon-kun?"  
"Please call Asahina-sensei, she's with Haruhi right now. Can you tell her to write a letter for 'Uncle John' tonight, after Haruhi falls asleep? It doesn't matter at what time she answers, but I need to read it now." As I heard my words mentally, I wondered how confusing this sentence would be for a three-dimensional mind.  
"Yes, I'll do, Kyon-kun. What should she write about?"  
"I'm worried for Haruhi. I want to know how she's doing. And if she needs anything, tell me."  
"Okay, I'll do it, Kyon-kun."  
"Thank you!"

I opened my safe box and got today's time mail. Ah, there it was, a computer-printed letter from Asahina-sensei to John Smith, with today's date. The time marked 10PM. Yeah, that was reasonable.

* * *

_Dear John:_

_I'm writing this letter in the morning, because I had to stay with Haruhi all night. But I'm stamping this with the date and time you asked me, so you can open it yesterday night. I hope I don't confuse you with this._

_Haruhi-chan is really maturing. I know from the future that she matured, but I never thought it would happen so fast. The poor girl cried all night because she had lost Kyon. She won't be going to school today, she's still feeling awful. She may look tough on the outside, but inside she's as soft as anyone, and was completely broken-hearted. What amazed me is that she accepted her loss without any complaints. When I asked her why she agreed to let Kyon-kun and Nagato-san kiss, she said: "How could I! Didn't you see how she broke down in the brigade room? Besides, Kyon had never cried for me before . I can't force him to choose me. And, what kind of friend would I be if I didn't respect his wishes?" See, she didn't blame anyone. She wasn't angry at anyone. Not at Kyon-kun, not at Nagato-san, not at the world, and not even at herself. She's feeling a bit better now, but I think she'll take more than two weeks to recover._

_She didn't even want to open the letter from you for yesterday. I asked her if I should open it, in case it contained an important message for her. She agreed, but all I found was a small message from you and her first letter. I told her that it wasn't urgent, so she put it on her drawer._

_Later she asked me if I was with her only to keep her powers under control. I had expected that, learning that she's someone special and dangerous turned her world upside down. She always believed she was an ordinary girl, with no relevance to the world, and this week she finds out she's a Mary-sue. Oh, maybe you don't understand that term. I mean someone very special to the world. She thought I was only here to keep her under observation, so I had to show her my true identity. Oh, you should have seen her face. She cried, and cried. When she felt better, she didn't know whether to call me "Sensei", "Asahina-san", or "Mikuru". I told her to call me "sensei", but that at home she could call me "mom" if she felt comfortable with it. The poor little thing couldn't stop crying. She reminded me of my younger-self._

_Don't worry, John-kun, she will be fine. It's getting late and I haven't prepared for school. There are a lot of books that I need to review! Do you know how hard it is to have to forget the latest archaeological discoveries and teach **outdated** history? Well, at least it's much easier than teaching physics! ;-) But I'll go now. Thank you so much for worrying for her. I'll tell her that you, I mean, John called and wanted to see how she was doing._

_Take care._

_Sincerely,  
Asahina Sensei._

_P.S. As this letter is very private, please shred it and burn the remains._

* * *

The next day was Friday, and as mentioned in the letter, Haruhi had called in sick. She probably didn't want to see either me or Nagato. Resting for the whole weekend would help her deal with the pain. But I was more amazed the next Monday. Haruhi had switched places with another student who was located at the front seat. It's pointless to ask how she did it. She probably asked her teacher, or maybe it was Asahina-sensei. But it's sufficient to say that Haruhi wished for it, so it happened.

It hurt. I hadn't realized, but it was fun talking to Haruhi about interesting stuff. I missed her. Not that I was in love with her - I wasn't, but I still missed her. As a friend. Is that how breaking up feels? But just seeing her, at the front row, paying attention to class, comforted me. Maybe it was better this way. If she made that heroic deed for us, I surely can wait.

During those four weeks, it rained. Every morning. But I didn't mind. If this was Haruhi's way of crying, I accepted it. Occasional phone calls to Koizumi confirmed me that no closed spaces appeared during this period of time. Koizumi assured me that this was indeed, a good sign, and that Haruhi was slowly feeling better. I could confirm this because the daily rains lasted less time with each day that passed. Of course, the daily talks with Asahina-sensei and the correspondence with "Uncle John" helped her a lot.

My mail exchanges with Haruhi helped me see her in another way. Instead of the annoying brigade leader, I grew fond of her as my niece. It sounds crazy, but the more I wrote to her about aliens, espers and time travelers, about mankind, love and wisdom, and about how brave she was to hide her emotions from Kyon, the more I felt like "becoming the mask". The moments I sat on the computer, I wouldn't feel like the young high schooler who missed the brigade activities. I would become John Smith.

Then I thought: Maybe it wasn't just Haruhi who was maturing. Maybe she helped me mature, too! I'll never forget her smile on the projection room. I wanted to be brave like her and give a better example to the world.

My talks with Nagato were minimal in school, but when I was home I would talk with her via telepathy. Hey, what can I say? It's better than phone. And it's free!

Often, I would pay her a visit to the Literature room. Without Asahina-san nor Koizumi, and especially without Haruhi, it didn't feel like the brigade room anymore. We both felt sorry for Haruhi, so we never kissed, not because of an end-of-the-world situation, but because we decided to respect her grief for me. It was only fair.

I wondered if this was alright for Nagato, but she told me that having me around was enough for her. And also for me. Just being around her made me happy. Not that we didn't miss Haruhi. We did, but we knew that when the time came, Haruhi would come back, crashing the door and shouting one of her crazy ideas. We were anxiously expecting that moment. But right now, the object of my desire was Nagato Yuki. The sweet alien angel who had chosen me to be around her.

"What are you reading, Nagato?"

Nagato showed me a huge book that seemed to be part of an encyclopedia. It read: "Journal of Psychology."  
"Is it interesting?"  
"Fascinating."  
"What part of it?"  
"All of it." She turned around to me, and asked: "Did you know that there are nearly decades of research on human psychology, and still new things are discovered every day?"  
"Oh, really?"

I took a seat. I looked at Nagato, and she began to blush. She would blush more, and more, and then she would giggle and smile at me.  
{ Stop it! }  
I would chuckle, and let her continue.

{ I love you. } I would tell her with my mind.  
{ I love you too. }

Nagato kept reading the book, with a faint smile on her face. Once in a while, she would stop reading, and turning around, she would ask: "Would you like some tea?" And I would say "Yes, please".

I would also visit Asahina-san, who temporarily joined the calligraphy club as a guest. Other times, she would pay us a visit and after hugging Nagato and asking how she was, she would prepare some tea for us.

Those were my boring days at school without the SOS Brigade. They helped us all think about who we were, and what we wanted. And the more time passed, the more certain we were: Either time travelers, espers, aliens, or common people, we knew in our hearts that we belonged to the SOS Brigade.

* * *

The fourth week, I prepared for school. Wait a minute, where are the clouds? There wasn't a single cloud in the sky. I arrived to the school, and saw Haruhi chatting with some girlfriends.

I must be dreaming. Haruhi? With friends? Smiling!?!?

"Amazing view, isn't it?" said a male voice behind me.  
"Koizumi! Long time, no see!"  
"So, what do you think?"  
"Oh, I had missed so much seeing her smile. And you know? I've been missing the brigade, too."  
"It's the same for me. It's a hard-to-break habit, don't you think?"

I nodded.

"In the end, it was for the better. The love deception that Suzumiya-san suffered, the circumstances around it, and over all, her courageous decision to give up on you, was just what she needed to accept the friendship of others. Having understood the joy and sadness of love, she opened herself to people she once considered "boring". I think she has finally realized that love may be the greatest mystery of the world. Even above aliens, espers, sliders and time travelers. Also, there's something that I want to show you."  
"What?"  
"Please sit down."

I sat down on a nearby bench next to him.  
"Hold my hand."  
My gaydar alert started ringing. Wait a minute, _Mr. Brokeback_, don't you think people would find it _queer _if they saw us alone, sitting on a bench, holding hands?  
"Oh, you're right. I guess a nudge will suffice."  
"Okay, that's better."

I closed my eyes, and reclined, pretending to be tired of studying or something. I felt Koizumi's nudge.

That instant, all the ambient sound was silenced.  
"You can open your eyes now."  
I opened my eyes, and saw something that amazed me. The sky was blue, and the sun was covered by a few clouds. There weren't any birds around, and no people, and no animals. But the trees and plants were in their place. A soft, fresh breeze caressed my face.

"Koizumi, what is this?"  
"This is Suzumiya-san's world. It's not a closed space anymore. She has accepted to live in the current world, with its virtues and defects."

Koizumi gave me a nudge again, and I still had my eyes closed, but I began to hear the tumult of the people around me. I opened my eyes and normalized my posture.

"You mean Haruhi's become a normal person? Has she lost her powers?"  
"No. It only means that her desires to re-create the world have disappeared. She has found new friends, and her life is much more colorful than before. Again, thanks to you."  
"I'm flattered."  
"Also, she's been visiting _The Agency_. We have been teaching her to control her powers. The emotional stress tests that she has had to go through are heartbreaking, but her resistance is growing exponentially every day. I'm growing very fond of her."  
"So am I."  
"Well," he said, standing up. "Time to say hello to my girlfriend."  
"Girlfriend?"

Koizumi stood up, and waved at Haruhi, who ran towards him, and kissed him, to the delight of her newfound friends.

That was the beginning of the fourth week. On the sixth week, Haruhi talked to me before the first class.

"Hey, Kyon! What's up?", she said, standing in a superman pose.  
"Haruhi, how are you doing?"

She stretched. "I think I finally finished shoving you off my system. Did you know Koizumi and I've been going out?"  
"Wow! Congratulations!"  
Haruhi took a nearby seat. "You know..." she said, sitting down on her old seat and looking at the window, "it's weird. I still miss you, but in a different way. I miss the brigade activities, and the mystery searches, and all the fun we had together..."

I sighed. "I miss them too. The brigade felt like a family to me. I miss Asahina-san's tea, and the games with Koizumi, and your crazy ideas..."

"Yeah." she said, sighing in nostalgia.

I looked at Haruhi. "What do you mean 'yeah'? And why are you sighing? You're the one who decided to suspend the activities! Don't tell me you still feel jealous of Nagato?"

"Of course not, you idiot! I already told you, I'm no longer in love with you! In fact", she said, grinning, "last night I almost _did it _with Koizumi."  
"What do you mean 'did it'?"  
"What else could I mean, you moron?" she shouted, slapping my head from behind. "I'm talking about sex! And you know I'm not an easy girl!"

Everyone stared at us.

"Hey, Haruhi, don't you think you should be talking about these things in private?"  
"If you're talking about the idiots around you, I don't care. Anyway, Koizumi told me I should wait, and that I shouldn't rush things. I don't agree with him, but we're still discussing. Anyway! I told you this to show you that I don't need you anymore. As a boyfriend, I mean! So... can we still be friends?"  
"Haruhi, I've always been your friend! You know it! So, when are you resuming the brigade activities?"

Having heard me say the magic word, Haruhi began to smile. Ah, that smile. That million watt smile I missed so much.

"You're right. We're starting TODAY!" she shouted. She grabbed me by my tie again (ah, how I had missed that annoyance) and took me running to the brigade room. There was Nagato, reading a book when she saw us storming in. When she looked at us, she smiled instantly. Haruhi was the first one to speak.

"Hey, Yuki! Missed me?"  
"You're back..."  
"Yes, I'M BACK! Today we resume the brigade activities!"

Nagato closed her book, and ran towards Haruhi, giving her a hug.  
"Sorry for making you cry", said Nagato, crying. "I missed you!"  
"Yuki, making me cry was the BEST thing you could do for me." Haruhi hugged Nagato again, and whispered something that made her blush. Then, Haruhi turned her head around, looking at me like an evil twisted cat in a classic Disney movie just after spotting a clumsy fat mouse. Hey, why are you looking at me like that, you demon?

Ignoring me, Haruhi whispered more things at Nagato, whose head turned as red as a metal bar heated to 580 degrees centigrade.

"Hey, Haruhi, what did you tell her?"

"Aaaanyway!", said Haruhi, turning around and standing in her superhero pose. "Today after school we'll have a mystery search! I'm going to tell Mikuru-chan and Koizumi. Meet me in class, Kyon!" she added, pointing at me.

After saying this, Haruhi ran and disappeared from the scene.

Nagato, what did she tell you?  
Nagato suddenly blushed and looked at the floor again. "Nothing."  
I shrugged. I don't know what she told her, and I really don't want to find out. Anyway, the bell rang, so after saying goodbye to Nagato, I returned to my classroom.

A few hours later...

As soon as the bell rang for the end of the classes, Haruhi walked to my place (remember she was at the front row now, but not for long), and looked at me with a grin worthy of a German mad scientist right before activating the switch for his doomsday device.

"Kyon, what are you waiting for! It's time!"  
"Wait! Let me at least put down my stuff!"  
"You never change! Always so slow!"  
"Okay, I'm done."

Haruhi proceeded to grab me by the tie, and ran towards the brigade room. I don't know which one of us was happier. Normally, those stairs would feel like a routine, like taking a shower or brushing my teeth. But right now, I felt like I was climbing the stairway to heaven. And now, the person showing a million watt smile was me.

While I was climbing those stairs, I wondered if I wasn't the one who had godly powers and they were all doing this to keep me entertained. But you know what? I didn't care. SOS-brigade, how I've missed you.

"Okay, I'm back!" she shouted, sitting on the table. "I have an announcement! Today we officially resume the activities with a mystery search! "

We all nodded and cheered.

"Kyon, why are you crying! Did someone die or what?"  
"I'm sorry..." I said. "It's just that I had missed this so much."  
"Idiot. Mikuru-chan, you too?"

Asahina-san couldn't hold her tears. She ran to Haruhi and hugged her as she had hugged me once. "Suzumiya-san, we missed you so much!" she said, hugging Haruhi and moving back and forth.  
"It's Okay, Mikuru-chan, It's OK, but let me finish!" she shouted, trying to struggle against Asahina-san's bear hug.  
"Mikuru~~-cha~~n! Stop it! Or you'll be punished! Stop it!! Mikuru-chan! Kyon, get this leech off me! Mikuru-chan! Kyon! What are you laughing at!"

Ah, sorry, Haruhi. I just laughed at seeing you have a taste of your own Mikuru-medicine. I patted Asahina-san, who finally stopped and went back to her seat, smiling, and sniffing.

Haruhi stood up on her chair to make a big announcement.

"Well, the meeting's today, at 4:30PM, at the usual place. Koizumi, don't leave yet. I need to talk to you. Everyone else, DISMISSED! But HURRY, I DON'T HAVE ALL DAY!" she shouted, standing up and clapping to get us out.

Nagato closed her book and deposited it on its corresponding slot in the bookcase. She left the room, followed by me and Asahina-san.

"Hmph! What a bunch of slugs!" said Haruhi from inside, shutting the door.

As we were walking downstairs, Nagato held my arm and reclined her head on my shoulder. She took me off guard.

"Nagato, what are you doing?"  
"I feel so happy right now."  
"You're not afraid of Haruhi's jealousy anymore?"  
"No. I'm 100% sure that her mind is focused on Koizumi-kun right now."  
"I'm glad."

Nagato looked at me, and showed me her beautiful smile. The smile that I had seen in that alternate world... the smile that had made me fall in love with her.

(End of chapter 10)

[ Insert End credits song: Bokuen Desho Desho (anime Opening for The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi) ]

* * *

H: Don't miss the next chapter! Chapter 11: The romantic date of Nagato Yuki!

Finally the moment we've been waiting for! Will Kyon finally take Yuki to a motel and make passionate love to her?  
K: Oy, Haruhi, what are you doing, you hellish succubus! Can't you see Nagato's blushing all over?  
N: … But I like it.  
K: Nagato!  
N: …...  
K: Anyway, Haruhi, there's nothing like that in the next chapter!  
N: Not exactly...  
H: Will she get pregnant and give birth to tiny cat-eared Yukis for Kyon to raise?  
K: Haruhi, give me that mic, you perv! You're ruining the script!  
N: …...  
H: Don't miss it! Hey!!!  
K: Yare, yare.  
H: Idiot.  
N: …...  
Click.


	11. The romantic date of Nagato Yuki

**Chapter 11.  
The romantic date of Nagato Yuki**

Finally, my life had returned to its normal course. That is, assuming that having mystery searches accompanied by a a time traveler, an esper, and an alien, under the orders of a walking deity born with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, is what you could consider "normal". But one thing was sure: It wasn't boring.

And after six weeks of not meeting to support Haruhi in her romantic loss, we were finally reunited. Meet the new SOS brigade: A "god" and her esper boyfriend, a well-endowed but shy traveler who was the mascot of the club, a human who happened to be a part-time time traveler, and his girlfriend from outer space.

Ah, Nagato... her soft hands, her sweet smile, her tender voice, her shyness that makes her blush in a way that would make all 'moe'-lovers in the world make a battle cry... sigh. Even when she is strong and can fight hand to hand against a giant cricket, or grab an enemy's combat knife with her bare hands without flinching, she is so delicate when she has to deal with human emotions, a new world for her to explore and enjoy. That girl is my sweet goddess, Nagato Yuki.

If Nagato's heart could be put in a pedestal, I would guard it with the most modern surveillance technology and have the greatest superheroes in the world patrol the surroundings.

Oh, I beg your pardon. Since I fell in love with her I can't stop thinking about her. That's how love is, isn't it? But let's return to my story. My life was returning to its relatively normal course. It was 4:10 PM, and I arrived at the brigade's established meeting point in the city.

"Kyon! You're already late! Don't you know about punctuality? And look! You made Yuki wait for you! What kind of a gentleman do you think you are?"  
Hey, don't get Nagato into this! The meeting was at 4:30 PM!

"Anyway! Just because I'm in a good mood, there will be no penalty for you today. You know the drill. Choose your partners with luck!"

Saying this, she took a few straws from her pocket, smiling like a golden Buddha found in Chinese food restaurants. Asahina-san was the first to take a straw.

"Uh... Suzumiya-san... what does this mean?"

It was a straw with a black tip on the bottom.

"Ah, that's the no-group!" answered Haruhi, smiling and patting Asahina-san. "Sorry, Mikuru-chan! You'll have to find the mystery on your own!"

Luck dictated that I would pair with Nagato, and Haruhi would pair with Koizumi. Hey, Haruhi, if you're planning to do this, why use the straws as an excuse? Don't tell me, I get it, 'because it's more fun this way'. Not that I complained, because when Nagato saw that she was to be in my group, she smiled like a kid would, after knowing that his favorite superhero would visit him.

Haruhi gave us the rest of the instructions: "Today I'll make an exception from our regular mystery searches! There will be no return meeting so you have all day to search, because finding a mystery today is MANDATORY! And the mystery you will search for..."

She took from her pocket three folded rectangular pieces of paper. "... is written in here!"

Oh, this is fantastic. Just when I thought this would be a regular date, she gets serious about this and ruins all the fun. I just hope we don't have to find a haunted house or a genie in a bottle.

"Mikuru-chan, you first!" shouted Haruhi. Asahina-san picked her paper, and it read:

Mystery to find: Female time traveler.

"Uh... but I'm a female time traveler..."  
"WONDERFUL!" shouted Haruhi, hugging Asahina-san and patting her shoulder. "Congratulations, Mikuru-chan, you've found your mystery! You have your afternoon all for yourself!"  
"Ehh???"  
"Bye bye~~~ see you tomorrow!" said Haruhi, waving goodbye at Asahina-san, who walked away scratching her head.

"Kyon, you're next!" said Haruhi, making me pick a piece of paper. I opened it, and it read:

Mystery to find: Female sexuality.

"Hey, what kind of joke is this?"

Haruhi looked at my paper, and read: "Are you an idiot, Kyon? Don't tell me you don't find THAT a mystery?"  
"Well, yes, but..."  
"I'm sure Yuki will be able to help you find it, right Yuki?"

Nagato read the paper, and began to blush.

"Well," finished Haruhi, "I'll go find my mystery with Koizumi! See you tomorrow!"

Then I noticed that the paper had been folded twice. And there seemed to be something written inside. Nagato was with me, and when I opened it, it read:

Suggested location: Love hotel.

I opened my eyes in shock, while Nagato covered her mouth. The intensity of her blush had increased one point in the logarithmic scale. No, 1.5. 1.7, 2.1... Nagato swallowed and began to breathe heavily. She looked terribly disturbed.

"Nagato..." I said.  
She looked at me briefly and then turned 180 degrees.  
"Um... yes?" she said. Her voice was trembling.  
"We don't have to do that. It was just a suggestion! Let's just have a normal date."

Nagato sighed in relief, and held my arm, reclining her head on my shoulder. She smiled. Slowly, her blush began to fade to an acceptable level - but not zero.

"Nagato, don't tell me you really believed we were going to do that?"  
"Um... yes..."

This time, I was the one who swallowed. Hey, Haruhi, you shouldn't be playing with Nagato just because she's unexperienced!

"Anyway... where would you like to go?" I asked.

Nagato touched her lips with her bent index finger. She stayed like that for a few seconds. "I don't know."  
Aw, Nagato... you really don't know about this, do you? Of course she doesn't, you dummy. You're her first date!  
"Well, I've played some dating simulation games... the places are usually a cafe, then the cinema, and then a restaurant... and then -"  
She blushed again.

"Nagato, you can skip that part."  
She smiled. "Okay."

And so, our "search for the mystery of female sexuality", also known in the human world, as "date", had begun.

The first thing we did was search for a cafe. We found one, and I recall having walked this street before.

"Is this fine for you, Nagato?"

But Nagato ignored me. She kept looking at the other street corner.  
"Nagato, is something wrong?"

She looked at me, and hugged my arm, closing her eyes. "Here's fine."

I invited Nagato an ice cream. "What flavor would you like?"  
"I don't know. I have never tasted them."  
"You haven't?"  
"No, it wasn't necessary for my mission."

I realized that Nagato's life so far had been incredibly boring. No wonder the only thing she did was reading books. She hadn't learned to enjoy the little pleasures of life. I asked the waiter to let her taste a little of each flavor so she could choose.

"So, Nagato, which one you liked the most?"  
"This one", she said, pointing at the lemon one. "But I also liked this other one". She was pointing at the chocolate one.  
"So, which one of those two?"

Nagato took a while to decide. "Chocolate."  
"Alright, chocolate it is, then."

I ordered some soda for myself, as I was feeling somewhat thirsty.

"You know, Nagato, I had never realized you never had time for yourself, to enjoy stuff... hey, Nagato, don't eat the ice cream so fast. Let it melt in your tongue for two more seconds so you can enjoy the taste a bit longer."

Nagato slowed down.

"Well, what do you think?" I asked. "Isn't it better this way?"  
She nodded. When she finished her ice cream, I offered her to drink from my soda. Looking at it, she put a second straw on it, smiling at me with an expression that said "I'm embarrassed but happy at the same time. Would you mind?". Oh, Nagato, how I love you!

I gave another sip to the soda to accompany her.

As she was sipping the soda with her little beautiful mouth, I would ask her some more questions about the changes she experimented.

"Nagato, mind explaining about the new protocols you received?"  
"Okay."  
"Wait. Your mouth's a bit dirty. Here." I said, wiping her mouth with a napkin.  
"Thank you. What would you like to know?"  
"Telepathy. Why did you get it?"  
"I really can't say why I got it. I just received it from Suzumiya-san, but It only works with you."  
"With me?"

She nodded.

"Hmm... that's interesting."

Nagato continued with her explanation. "Also, it seems to be designed so that Suzumiya-san can't access our thoughts."

Now, that's even more interesting. I remembered how bad Haruhi felt about intruding Nagato's dreams, and maybe this was a way for her to provide Nagato the privacy she needed to communicate with me. Maybe Haruhi was scared of knowing what we were talking about.

"I also received a similar protocol that works with dreams."  
"Dreams?"  
"It means I can share a lucid dream with you. Would you like to try tonight?"

Hmm... I only had one lucid dream in my life. Not counting the weird-Haruhi-dream-in-a-closed-space kind of dream, of course. So I got curious.

"Yeah, why not?"  
"Okay."

I paid the bill, and we continued walking. Then Nagato stopped at a wedding store, just before an antique bookstore. Hey, I remember this one! Nagato had stopped to... look at the bride's dress!

"Nagato..."  
"Yes?"  
"Remember when you stopped at this store before?"  
"Yes."

We were interrupted by a salesman. Hey, I remember you!  
"Ah, you're here again! And I see you brought your boyfriend with you!"  
Nagato blushed, smiled, and looked down.  
"Ah ha, I knew it!" said the salesman. "So you were planning to get married after all!"  
No, I'm not...  
"Yes."

Nagato! Did you just...?

I couldn't think of anything more.

"Ah, I knew it, I knew it!" the salesman said. "No wonder you came here everyday to look at that dress!"

What did you say? I turned to look at Nagato, who covered her face in embarrassment.

"Nagato.... since when have you been going here?"

"Since that day. I felt very lonely, and I couldn't stop thinking of us being married and living together."

"Oh, Nagato... why didn't you tell me?"

She hugged me. The strength of her hug, and her face made me remember all the pain that she had to go through. "I was scared..." she said, frowning.

"Shh shhh shh... it's fine, it's fine." After petting her back, I put my hands on her shoulders and looked at her eyes. "You don't have anything to worry about now, do you?"

She hugged me again, and closed her eyes. "I love you."  
"I love you too."  
"Kyon..."  
"Yes?"

Nagato stared at me with a face that begged for compassion. Nagato, what's wrong?  
"Please marry me."

If this had been a fighting video game, those words alone would have drained all my life bar in an instant. Because I had never thought of Nagato that way. I just knew that I loved her, and that it felt good going out together. But getting married? This idea alone shocked me - not that it was bad, but it shocked me.

Then I began to consider it. Hey, why not? Wait - what does the Integrated Data Sentient Entity think about this?

"Nagato, um... will your boss allow this?"  
Nagato looked at me, and her face looked worried. "I don't know... and I'm afraid to ask."  
Oh, poor Nagato... I kept hugging her, when she suddenly smiled. And it was a huge smile. "They approve!"

Nagato hugged me and began to shed tears. "They approve!!", she said again.  
"I'm so glad, Nagato!"

The salesman interrupted us. "So, when do you plan to have the wedding?"  
"Uh?"

I was thinking of getting married after going to college. But asking right now was simply too soon.  
"Nagato, I think we should wait at least until college. Is it ok with you?"  
"Yes.", she said, hugging me. We said goodbye to the salesman, and continued our date.  
"Nagato, where would you like to go now?"  
"Bookstore."

As we were about to enter the bookstore, the salesman gave a 'thumbs up' to me. You greedy bastard... but, you have my deepest gratitude. Maybe, without you mentioning those things when Nagato and I were mystery searching, Nagato wouldn't be free to love me. It's interesting, how events so important end up being caused by a tiny coincidence.

We entered the bookstore. Nagato was browsing some books, while I actually got bored after the first 10 minutes. I felt my sleeve being pulled by Nagato.

"I want this."

That's the book that she was reading the other time. "Mysteries of the Human Mind", a treatise on psychology.

"Okay, I'll buy it for you."  
"Thank you!" she said, smiling. And now that I think of it, this was the first book that she actually owned.  
"So, ready to go?"  
"No, I want to keep browsing other books."  
"Okay", I said, petting her hair. "You tell me when you want to go."

Nagato took my hand and rubbed in against her cheek. Instinctively, I hugged her. She smiled, and walked (although it seemed like she was actually floating) to get lost in the bookstore halls. Whenever she was in a library or bookstore, she looked like a boy in Candy land.

Now that I think about it, why don't I search for books that I might get interested in? Hmm, good question. I used to like science fiction books, but my whole life has become a live action science fiction novel.

So, I went to another corridor when my visual radar located Nagato a few steps from me. As usual, she was submersed in the book she was reading. Maybe her mind had left her body and entered the pages of the book itself, because I had never seen her so interested in a book. Her eyes were sparkling with life, and her mouth movements reflected the surprise and amazement at that mysterious book. Perhaps it was a novel? Science fiction? Adventure? Detective Thriller? I don't know, but she really seemed interested in that book. In short periods of time, she smiled, gasped, blushed, got scared, smiled again... a novel, that must be it!

She wasn't just reading. She was _devouring_ that book, as if its words were being sucked by a gigantic vacuum cleaner located in her pupils. She flipped the pages and her eyes moved frantically as if she were in a fast-reading contest with an invisible reader to see who finished first.

Definitely, DEFINITELY I would purchase this book for her as a present, and then I'll read it myself. Any book that makes Nagato get this interested on it, must be interesting for me. I better go ask her.

"Nagato, what are you reading?"

Surprised, she gasped, and quickly turned around before shutting the book closed. Ah, I scared you? Ha ha! Hey, maybe one of these days I'll play a little prank on you and shout "boo!" while you read.

"Nothing!" she shouted. The book she was holding fell to the floor. Wait a minute, Nagato, why did you say 'nothing'? I don't bite!

The book fell on the floor right before me. I knelt down, and picked up the …

Karma Sutra Extended edition with Q and A!?!? I looked around. Hey! What am I doing in the sexuality section!!! AH!!! Now I know why she was so embarrassed!!!

Nagato blushed, and I slowly put the book where it belonged.

An awkward silence followed. A very... long... and awkward... silence.

"........................................"

"........................................."

Who would break the ice first?

"Eh, Nagato..."  
"Yes!?"  
"I don't think... you should feel... er... ashamed for reading that... I mean", I said, scratching my neck, "It's perfectly normal for a healthy erm... alien data entity humanoid interface... to be interested in... _that_... but... if you want to change the subject -"  
"Yes, please!"

Another awkward silence followed. Ugh, I absolutely hate these situations! There's only _one_ solution for this. Operation "break awkward silence with a kiss" begins!

I quickly grabbed her shoulders, violently turned her around, and before she could react, I counterattacked with a kiss worthy of James Bond struggling against the sexiest of his enemies. Her eyes opened wide, but then she closed them again, slowly hugging me. I hugged her, and her left leg wrapped around my right leg. Our arms began to move slowly around our backs, while our hands described a dance that could be compared to a classical interpretation of Tchaikovsky's Swan Lake. Then, our hands slowly lowered, dangerously approaching the zone where the back loses its innocent name. The passion between us was reaching levels so high that it would soon escape the planet's gravity. Someone better find an extinguisher before the nearby books catch fire.

But there was no need, because the sound of a throat being cleared interrupted us, leaving us exposed to the penetrating gazes of people around. Hey, don't look! Someone give us back our moral clothes!

The two walking tomatoes slowly went downstairs, in the most uncomfortable silence ever experienced. I purchased Nagato the psychology book she wanted. After we got out, I began to chuckle, and so did her. We eventually laughed, and the laugh was so hard that tears came from our eyes. We ended up looking at each other, face to face. Ah, Nagato, your smile looks so beautiful!

We suddenly felt a mutual attraction comparable to the one between two neodymium magnets. Our lips approached slowly, like the sun and the moon do in an eclipse. I could feel energy jumping between our lips, like an electric arc emitted by a Tesla coil. Eventually, our lips merged and a reaction inside us occurred, so violent that it could be compared to the encounter of sodium and water.

Nagato pushed me softly to break the kiss. "Stop!" she said, panting. Oh, that sensual face! I think that my brains are going to explode! I quickly stepped back, because this wasn't the time nor the place. Nagato spoke, trying to catch her breath.

"The... physiological response... to the kiss... has initialized … a subroutine... which should only be used..."

"You're right, we were going too fast."

She sighed. "I've shut it down, but the trigger is very sensitive. Please don't kiss me for at least ten minutes."

To calm down the pressure that we had been accumulating, I began to walk. She grabbed my hand. Eventually, our hormones calmed down.

"I love you".  
"I love you too."

We heard a voice calling us from not far away. "Hey, Kyon-kun! Nagato-san!"  
Tsuruya-san!?

"How are the two lovebirds doing! Too bad I don't have my video camera with me, that was the most wonderful kiss I could ever see, nyoro~!"  
Nagato and I blushed. Tsuruya-san, please don't say these things so loud!

"So, I guess the date's going OK, right? Suzumiya-san told me about it."  
"She did?" Damn traitor, what do you think this is, candid camera? Wait a minute, were you spying on us!?

I could already imagine Haruhi, Koizumi and Asahina-san being together while spying on us with binoculars. No, a more sinister thought came to my mind. It was "The passionate love of Nagato Yuki, ep. 00". My whole body shivered. Someone close the fridge door! NOW!

Tsuruya-san spoke to lock down the ramblings of my wild imagination.  
"Anyway, I got three tickets to see a new movie. Wanna go?"

Nagato looked at the tickets.  
"What is it about?" she asked.  
"Romance, Nyoro~! Suzumiya-san said it would be interesting for you, Nagato-san! She said something about it being 'an important research subject'."  
"She did?"  
"So, wanna go? It starts in 30 minutes!"  
"......"

Nagato stared at the ticket, as she usually do with all the interesting things.  
"We'll go."  
"It's alright! I'll pay for everything!"  
"No, Tsuruya-san, thank you very -"  
"Don't worry! Just enjoy the movie with Nagato-san! I'll pay for the dinner after that, too!"  
"Thank you", said Nagato.

Wait a minute, you had this planned in advance? I began to look around me to check if Haruhi was hiding somewhere around.

"Kyon?" asked Yuki.  
"Ah, nothing! I just had the feeling that Haruhi was around, somewhere, spying on us. But don't worry. Let's go see the movie."

A black cab was awaiting for us.  
"Ah, you're back, Ojou-sama", said the driver. Wait a minute! It's Arakawa-san!  
"Thanks, take us to the cinema!"

We got in the car, and Tsuruya asked a question for Nagato. "So, Nagato-san, is it true that you're an alien from outer space, and that you didn't have emotions before?"

This question was safe to ask, because we were in a car belonging to _The Agency_.

"Yes."  
"So, tell me, what does it feel to have human emotions?"  
"It's an ambivalent experience. It can be terribly painful, but it can also be beautiful, and it never stops being interesting. I wouldn't trade it for anything, and I wish all of my colleagues came here to experience it."  
"Well, I'm glad for you! By the way", Tsurya-san whispered, "if you need any help learning about sexuality, don't hesitate to call me! I can answer all your doubts!"

Hey, Tsuruya-san! You didn't have to say that in front of me!

Nagato blushed, looked down, and blushed. "Uh... thank you very much for your offer."  
"I'm glad, nyoro~! Drop me a call or an e-mail, and we can talk any time!"  
"Thank you."

We arrived to the cinema, and were escorted by two thugs whose physical complexion seemed to come out from a manga made by Tetsuo Hara. Definitely, the Tsuruya family was well protected. But I digress.

While watching the movie, it felt good resting my palm on Nagato's shoulder. She would hold my hand with hers and caress it softly.

The movie was very romantic and touching. It made my eyes leak a couple of drops at the end. Everyone applauded, and so did we. As the lights turned on, I looked at Nagato and her cheeks were filled with tears. It was the most beautiful waterfall I had ever seen. She was sniffing and cleaning her tears, as she smiled. I began to wonder if her body had been altered with a "300% charm" hack. Everything she did made me fall in love with her more and more. As I was thinking this, I was approached by someone at my left. I turned, and Tsuruya-san gave me a handkerchief and winked at me. So I passed it to Nagato.

"Thank you."

A girl shouted from behind. "WHAT AN AWESOME MOVIE! It makes you want to make your own, don't you think so, Kyon?"

Haruhi!?!?!? Koizumi? Asahina-san?? And Asahina-sensei too!?!? What are you doing here!?

I knew it. I knew you were behind this, you evil mastermind! So, what is it this time? Operation cupid? I also noticed that Asahina-san had been crying during the movie, too.

Haruhi ran down towards us. "Yuki, I need to talk to you for a minute. Would you mind?"  
Nagato would talk with her, and occasionally she would blush, and they would talk more, Nagato would say something to Haruhi, sometimes blushing and looking down, sometimes not. Haruhi would talk to her and pat her shoulders, and smile at her or make some gestures indicating instructions. This was repeated five or six times. The talk finished with Nagato hugging Haruhi.

Tsuruya-san then escorted us to a very fine restaurant that belonged to her family.  
"Well, we'll leave you now so you can talk about anything you want. Anything you consume is on the house, you're special guests! Enjoy!"

While we were waiting for the food, I talked with Nagato about various topics.

"Hey, Nagato..."  
"Yes?"  
"Remember your first poem? The one you wrote for the Literature club?"  
"Yes."  
"I've been thinking..." I said. "Did you really choose your name because of the snow you saw falling?"  
"Yes."  
"So you like snow."  
"Very much."  
"Okay, I'll keep that in mind."

I didn't tell her, but I remembered a souvenir shop that had these little glass spheres with winter scenes on it. You would shake them and it would make it seem like it snowed inside. Maybe I'll buy it for her on her birthday. Wait a second, what day was she born?

"Nagato... when were you born?"  
"I was born 45 thousand, three hundred and seventy one years ago. Perhaps you mean as a humanoid interface?"  
"Yes, that."

She gave me the exact date. "Why do you ask?"  
"I wanted to know which day you would like to celebrate your birthday."  
"Ah... I see", she said, smiling and looking at the table. "In that case I would like to celebrate it the day I first met you."  
"The day you first met me? That was around a month after classes - no wait, it was Tanabata, right?"  
"Yes."  
"Okay."

When we finished eating, I escorted her to her appartment, and finally got home.

Haruhi was so right. There was so much about Nagato that I didn't know. She was the shy innocent girl, and she was also the "great goddess" that saved me from a lot of problems. But I was discovering many things about her. She had deprived herself from enjoying life as an earthling. But today she also discovered many things about herself that she probably didn't know in the first place. Now we know that she likes chocolate ice cream. And of course, that she loves to see snow fall, and she is very curious about sexuality.

I was dead tired. So it was time to sleep.

* * *

Later that night...

I woke up, but I was surprised to see that I was no longer in my room. I was in Nagato's room. Had I been teleported there, or...

"Welcome."  
I turned around, and there she was! Still wearing her school uniform. Hey, why am I wearing my uniform, too?

Nagato blushed, and hugged me. "Thanks for today, it was a beautiful date."  
"You're welcome."

Hey, her room has all kinds of pictures in it. And some are animated! But why does it look so big?

"Because it's my dream. Remember I told you we could share a dream?"  
"Oh, right! But it feels very real."  
"My dreams are always like this. But now I'm able to process them in a virtual space. This way, my data remains intact even in the case of a malfunction. Asahina-san gave me the idea."

"Oh, I see."  
"Um... Kyon..."  
"Yes, Nagato?"

Nagato was blushing, and the exact tone of blush in her cheeks made me feel strangely uncomfortable - but at the same time, I liked it.

"Hug me."

I hugged her. Before I knew it, we were sitting on the couch in her living room. I noticed that her appartment had changed since I last came to visit her. There were curtains, and several TV sets showing snowy scenes. So is this how Nagato's dreams look like?

But it wasn't the time to ask myself such questions. All I knew was that she was there for me, and I was there for her. She reclined her head on my shoulder. I looked at her, and she closed her eyes, softly smiling. I felt a strange warmth coming from her. I bet she was feeling the same.

"Kyon..."  
"Yes, Nagato?"  
"Since the last few weeks, I've dreamed a lot with you..."  
"Oh?"  
"Many times, I dreamed you were here, together with me... and you kissed me... and ..."

She paused for a second before continuing.

Kyon... could you do me a favor?"  
"What is it?"  
"Request... permission..."

She blushed and turned around.

"... for sex?"

I swallowed. Nagato, what are you saying!

Nagato softly pushed my body so that it would recline on the couch. , and knelt around my hip. "Please?"

"But..."

"It's just a dream."

I knew it was a dream, but, at the same time, I didn't want to do THAT to her. I admit it, I'm a perv. I've read too many explicit doujins and there were some disgusting things there. I didn't want to spoil Nagato's... purity. I would never agree to make Nagato do those _nauseating _things that would make her look like a slut.

"You're wrong."  
"What?"

"I've read many of those explicit magazines and doujins, and I've even watched movies as part of my research. I'm 100% sure that there was no love in them. In a loving relationship, there are limits that the spouses establish as part of the mating ritual. I've read some other doujins and magazines where they focus more on the feelings. I've found them pleasing as well."

Nagato continued, lying over me and resting her head on my chest. "It's very wrong for you to believe that the sexual act in a couple has to be as disgusting as the one depicted in magazines - especially those written only to satisfy and distort male libido. Making love is much more about touching the other person's feelings than the body. This is not only what I have researched, but it's my own opinion as well."

I was speechless. Not only because a four-year-old alien was lecturing me, but because I realized how dirty the human mind could be. I felt ashamed.

Nagato opened my right palm and interleaved her left hand fingers with it. She did the same with my left hand.

"Also, don't humans have dreams of this nature?"  
"Yes, but..."  
"Some religions and cultures reject sex outside a marriage agreement. But so far I haven't found a single culture or religion that finds sex in dreams unacceptable. Or it's that you don't... find me attractive?"

Oh, Nagato, don't look at me like that! Not with those sad eyes!  
"No, it's not that, Nagato... it's just that..."  
"What?" she asked.  
"It's very embarrassing... I don't think I'm ready yet..."  
"I see... but at the same time I don't understand... or is it that you don't want to take the initiative?"

I blushed. I never knew Nagato was so well-versed in this stuff. Maybe you feel much more comfortable while you're dreaming?

"Nagato, I... is it REALLY OK with you? For us, to do it while we dream?"  
"Yes, I feel more secure in here. Because this is my dream. My place. I have absolute domain over this virtual space, and it was reserved for only you and me."

Nagato looked at me with a firm gaze that said "I want to do it", but at the same time her gaze said "...please?"

So far, this had been the most difficult decision in my life. And it was because...

Nagato was Nagato for me. As I looked at her head resting on my chest, and as I was caressing her, I realized that her sailor school uniform had, in my mind, become part of her. If I ever saw her body without any clothes ... I think it would ruin the pure angelical image I had of her. No, it's not that. I'm afraid of seeing her naked, and I admit it, I like girls with big breasts, but I don't want to offend her. I don't want her to feel uncomfortable with her body. Frankly, I'm more scared of hurting her if my reaction at seeing her body isn't what she wants. And if that hurts her, I couldn't stand the pain of looking at her in the eyes, knowing that I hurt her. Nagato, it's not that I don't like your body, but... I'm scared of that. But, taking that aside, I really don't know how I would feel after seeing you naked, after discovering that most intimate part of you... I don't want to ruin it.

"I see..."  
"Nagato, you just read what I thought?"  
"It was a beautiful thought. I also think I know one of the reasons for your nervousness."  
"What is it?"  
"I've felt uncomfortable with the design of my own body, too. I think it's because my flat chest could subconsciously remind you of a child's, creating a conflict between your feelings."

I never thought of it that way. Perhaps you're right.

"In any case, I have an idea that perhaps you would find interesting."  
"What?"

She looked at me. "The human body has 5 senses to perceive reality. I could fill your vision with some views in my memory while we..." She blushed again and looked somewhere else. "... you know."  
"I'm... not sure..." I answered.  
"What if..." she asked again. "... I erased your entire sensorial memory corresponding to that part of the dream?"  
"Wait, erasing my memory? Are you sure there won't be any side effects to that?"

"It's 100% safe. You don't have to worry."  
"In that case, I think it's Ok... just... don't look, I would feel very embarrassed the next day, knowing that you have seen me."

Nagato briefly giggled.

"Why are you laughing?"

"I didn't know that shy part of you. But, if you wish, I can erase the corresponding part of my own memory."

"Well, that makes me less embarrassed, but wouldn't that be counterproductive? What use is doing it if you can't remember?"

"I will only erase the memory corresponding to the 5 human senses. But not all memory consists of sensorial information. That will be enough for both of us."

Nagato sat up. "Wait... I have a better idea."  
"What is it?"

Instead of having to delete our memories, I can create an additional memory space corresponding to sensorial information, that will be only accessed through our shared dreams. The rest of the information will be stored in your human memory. This way, while in our dream, we can talk about our impressions of... you know."

God, Nagato, how I love it when you get shy.

She smiled again, still blushing. "Accept?"  
"Permission granted."

I don't remember what happened next. My memory was too blurry. But I know that we shared a feeling of mutual trust and exploration. I remembered knowing that she had blushed many times, but I can't really remember those times. I also remember having blushed many times, and also reaching a mutual agreement, most of it non-verbal, about what to do and what not to do. But I can't really remember what we actually did or said. I also remembered that our feelings harmonized, and that we looked at each other's eyes. I can't remember the details, but I know that happened. And I felt a wonderful beauty inside her, and I know that she felt the same way for me. It was the most wonderful feeling I've ever experienced.

The next thing I remember is that we were again clothed, and reclined on the couch. Her face looked like an angel's. She gently took my hand and reclined her head on it.

She sighed. "I'm glad I'll be remembering the next nights. It's something that is too beautiful to forget."

I caressed her cheek with my thumb. "I feel the same."

Nagato was smiling, and blushing, but not out of embarrassment. It was a nice smiling blush.

"Kyon..."  
"Yes?"  
"I feel very happy right now."

I hugged her, and for some reason I felt like caressing her shoulder from beneath her clothes.

"Please do", she said.  
I kept caressing her, and I realized that I wasn't afraid at looking at her bare body, anymore. I think she read my thoughts, because she unbuttoned her shirt.

"You can caress me all you want now."

I don't remember having seen her, but my mind did remember the feeling of caressing her body. It was a wonderful feeling. There was nothing sexual about it, it just was a wonderful feeling of two spouses loving each other.

I never thought this would be possible. I had always thought that the best part of sex was the climax. But after this, I realized that the best part, is caressing each other, without saying anything, and just resting. It really surprised me. Really, human sexuality was a wonderful mystery.

Nagato gently spoke. "I think we have fulfilled our mystery search, don't you think?"  
I laughed at her comment. Oh, Nagato, you have a good sense of humor too! I love you.  
"I love you too."

I don't know how much more time passed. But our love had increased and we had a shared treasure that none of us could remember... at least while awake.

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP.

I sighed. I was in my room again. Actually, I had never left it. What a wonderful dream. It looked like hours had passed, but I was fully rested. Was it really a dream? Did I really make love with Nagato in our dreams? Or was it only a fantasy? And why did I feel so happy when I thought about her?

{ Good morning.... Kyon. }  
Her voice sounded so soft.  
{ Good morning... Yuki. }  
{ I love you. }  
{ I love you too. }

I received a telepathic image of Yuki (I would no longer call her Nagato) looking at my eyes, with her soft, loving smile. That image transmitted a thought to me. That thought contained the following information: One, That the dream had been real. Two, that it had been Yuki's most beautiful experience in her short human life. Three, and most important, that the love she felt for me was beyond anything she could possibly imagine. This wasn't just my imagination. The information was real, and I knew for sure that it had been signed by her and verified by the Integrated Data Sentient Entity. How I knew? I didn't know. I just knew.

I received her thought, and smiled.

She spoke again, and said:

{ What would you like for lunch? }  
{ Anything you make is fine for me. }

We both smiled.

* * *

A few weeks later...

My life was slowly changing. Yuki would make lunch for me every morning, and we would participate in the brigade activities. As members of the SOS brigade, we had more adventures, some even dangerous, against an anti-brigade that had finally come out from the shadows. But we had survived those challenges without any casualties. So did they, but we won.

Yuki's mission had finished as a humanoid interface, as the Integrated Data Sentient Entity finally acquired the data creation ability it needed to overcome its self-evolution cycle. But more important, they finally had embraced the idea of Love. And that was a much more important change. Yuki's new mission was to live. The same mission had been given to Yuki's partner, Kimidori-san. Yuki shared some of her feelings with her, and Yuki told me that she cried a lot. Surely, the experience was shocking to Kimidori san. But in the end, she was glad she received this new information. She also vowed to protect Yuki and I, and all the SOS brigade members.

In related news, we also received a new member in the brigade: A nice sophomore girl with a personality that was the complete opposite of Haruhi. She happened to come from a parallel world. Later, we would have our final battle against the anti-brigade. During that battle, Haruhi finally found out that I was John Smith, and she also learned the true nature behind her powers. With no more enemies who wanted Haruhi's power, the universe was safe at last. But that story belongs in another book, so let's continue with our current story.

It was one of the last days of May. I had a wonderful dream, as usual. I had been having shared dreams with Yuki, but I knew it couldn't go on like this. Something had to change, and I had already discussed it with her. We would definitely _**do it**_, this upcoming Tanabata. That would be our first night together. No dreams, and no inhibitions.

But that day was not today. Today was a normal school day. I got up from bed, said "hi" to Yuki telepathically as I would every morning. I showered, got dressed, and finally went to eat breakfast with the family.

Before sitting down, I had to tell my family about the Tanabata party that Haruhi and the brigade would have soon (the party that would precede the night that Yuki and I had been waiting for so long).

"Everyone, I have a very important announcement to make."  
"What is it, Kyon? Is something wrong?"  
"What, Kyon-kun?" asked my little sister.

"Mom, dad, sis. Don't worry, it's not bad news, so don't get scared. It's actually very good news."

Their faces were filled with curiousity. I had never made a formal announcement before.

"This Tanabata, Haruhi and the SOS brigade will have a party. A very important party for all of us, and I need you to go."

"Oh, sure, son, we'll go."  
"Yay, a party!" shouted my little sister.

"Wait, there's something else, and it's more important. The reason is that it's a party dedicated to Yuki and me. We're getting married."

(End of Chapter 11)

Don't miss the next chapter: Epilogue!


	12. Epilogue

**Epilogue.**

July 7. Morning.

How much can a groom sleep before his wedding? Today I realized that my wedding night could be much more exhausting than I initially thought, because I only managed to sleep 4 hours due to my nervousness. I would be terribly embarrassed if I fell asleep during _the night_. I mean, it could be our dream wedding night, but it would still be embarrassing. Hey, why am I talking about this?

The preparations were done for our married life. From an economic point of view, I would win a lot because Yuki was very rich. Can you say "Instant money"? (Let's hope this doesn't affect the national inflation). We purchased a small house, and one with a garden! Hey, now that I think of it, that's what I wished for in Tanabata last year. Who would've thought? Still, I found myself somewhat uncomfortable because I didn't have to pay a cent. What kind of husband was I supposed to be?

Bah. Screw male pride. Yuki wants me to live with her, so that's what I'll do. And because the decision to get married was hers in the first place, she shouldn't complain, right? So let's get this money monologue out of our minds.

When I arrived at school, the first thing I noticed was that everyone began to congratulate me and express their envy. The official Nagato Yuki fan club, whose existence was unknown to me before today, were crying, and posted a huge banner on the school saying "Nagato-sama, we'll miss you!". Idiots, if they loved her so much why didn't they ever ask her if she was feeling lonely? I'm sure they only fantasized about screwing her and never really cared for her as a human being... because that's what I consider her to be. Alien or not, in my mind, she was as human as I.

"Hey, Kyon!" shouted Taniguchi as soon as he saw me entering the classroom.  
"Taniguchi, Kunikida! How've you been?"  
"Kyon, you lucky bastard! Why did you wait so much to tell us?" asked Taniguchi. "We hadn't found out until Haruhi began posting the news for your wedding all over the school!"  
"That was last week, why do you keep complaining about that?"  
"Congratulations, Kyon! I'm glad for you!" added Kunikida.  
"So, Kyon", said Taniguchi. "I guess it was a lie all that you said about Nagato-san being anemic last year, when I found you cuddling on the floor, eh? You liar..." he said, nudging me.

I wondered if I should make another excuse for that, or tell them the truth. Well, maybe it would be fun. Why not?

"Well, the truth is that both Asakura-san and Yuki are aliens from outer space, and Asakura-san wanted to kill me to perform an experiment. Yuki grabbed her ray gun and disintegrated Asakura-san because she was not following orders."

Everyone stared at me and then burst in laughter. "That's a good one, Kyon! Why don't you try writing a science fiction tale the next year?"

"Maybe I will, Taniguchi, maybe I will."

The classes started. At the beginning of each class, the teachers would congratulate and applaud me. It was fine at the beginning, but when all teachers did it, I could noticed the boredom of my classmates. Needless to say, Haruhi kept cheering and applauding. Later, at class, Haruhi didn't stop poking my back with her pencil to give me tips for the wedding night. What's wrong with this woman, anyway? We're in class!

Finally, lunch time. I walked to the brigade room to say hi to Yuki, when I saw something that I shouldn't have. At least not until tonight.

"Eek!!!"  
"Sorry!" I shouted, closing the door.

"Kyon, you idiot! How many times have I told you to knock before entering! You're not supposed to see the bride wearing her dress before the wedding!"  
"I'm sorry!" I shouted. Well, the problem wasn't exactly that Yuki was wearing her dress. The problem was that she was **not** wearing it.

"Um, everything alright in there?"  
"Everything but you!" shouted Haruhi from inside. "Anyway, you can come in already. Yuki's already dressed."

I entered, apologizing for my rudeness. And to my surprise, the whole room was filled with wedding presents for both Yuki and me. There were presents from Taniguchi, Kunikida, Kimidori-san, the president of the Student Council, the Computer Research Society, Haruhi's new friends...

"What's all this?"  
Haruhi rolled her eyes. "Isn't it obvious!? You've saved the world, traveled through times and different dimensions and still don't know what a wedding present is?"  
"I KNOW what they are! It was a rhetorical question!"  
"Well, I'll leave you two lovebirds to talk", answered Haruhi, taking a bag with Yuki's dress. "Just remember," she added, nudging and winking at me. "You must save some of your energy for the wedding night!"

I shook my head and sighed while putting my palm on my face. Yuki giggled. After Haruhi closed the door, Yuki walked to hug me. I kissed her softly.

"Did you sleep well?" I asked her.  
"I almost couldn't sleep. You?"  
"Neither."  
"I love you."  
"I love you too."

We looked at each other's eyes for what seemed quite a long time, before I gave her another kiss.

"So, what are we gonna do with all these presents?" I asked.  
"Tsuruya-san will move them later."  
"Ah, I see."

Someone knocked the door.

"Yes, come in!" I shouted.

It was Kimidori-san. "Kimidori-san, how've you been?"  
"I'm fine, thanks!"

Kimidori-san entered the room and hugged Yuki. "I'm so glad for you! This is a landmark in interstellar relations."  
"I know..."  
"By the way", added Kimidori-san. "The wedding is going to be presided by the Elder."  
Yuki didn't answer. When I looked at her face, she looked completely surprised.

"Yuki, what's wrong?"  
"The... Elder?"  
"That's right. He also says he forgives you for last December, and that he's sorry for allowing you to go through so much pain."

I still didn't understand. Elder? Last December? You don't mean December the 18th, right?

Yuki hugged Kimidori-san and cried for a little. "Thank you, thank you!!!" she kept saying. She wiped her tears, and thanked Kimidori-san for the news. I waited for Yuki to explain to me.

"Kyon..." she said, sniffing. "The Elder... is the oldest member of our group. With billions of years old, his authority is supreme over all of us, and he's going to preside our wedding! I'm shocked..."

Then, she turned to Kimidori-san. "Why? Why is He coming personally?"  
"To express our gratitude to you. Anyway, everyone's waiting for you two in the cafeteria."  
"The cafeteria?"  
"We have a lunch table reserved for you two."

Kimidori-san smiled, and bowed. "Please don't make everyone wait."

Wow, this day was full of surprises. We went downstairs and a wave of applauses flooded the entire room. Haruhi had reserved a table for us to eat our lunch, and there was a huge _bento_ with the figure of a bride and a groom. As we took our corresponding portion, everyone applauded, and proceeded to serve themselves.

It felt weird, like if we were already married and enjoying our wedding dinner... breakfast.

The rest of the day was relatively normal. At least until the last class, when Haruhi made an unwelcome announcement.

"Hey, I'd like to make an announcement!" she said at the beginning of the last class. "I just purchased Kyon this DVD to give him an advise for the honeymoon!"

Hey, Haruhi, will you stop embarrassing me already? And in front of my classmates?  
"What, it's not like it's a tabu!"  
"Yes, it is!"  
"Then with more reason you should read this! You wouldn't like Yuki to complain that you were reading the user's manual in the last minute, would you?" Everybody laughed at Haruhi's statement. Well, everybody but me.  
"Haruhi, for the love of God, SHUT UP! I know that already, it's not like I'm ten years old!"  
"But you can't know everything when you're a virgin!"  
"YOU DON'T SAY THAT IN PUBLIC!"  
"Kyon, stop making so much noise, can't you see that you're interrupting the class?"

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!!!!!!!!!!

The students' laughter was finally silenced by the teacher clearing her throat. "Well, let's start the class", she said. Sensei, thank you. I turned around and Haruhi was still laughing silently, while her head was glowing with the same color of the Kryptonian sun. Haruhi, you did this just to annoy me, you... you... nevermind.

As soon as the class finished, one of the students shouted. "Hey, Kyon! Look at the sky!"

I looked outside the window, and the clouds had just formed a gigantic banner that said: "Yuki (heart) Kyon", followed by today's date. Seeing no airplane in the vicinity, I didn't need to guess who was responsible for the miraculous celestial decoration. I turned my head to look at Haruhi, who made an innocent face.

"What?"  
I smiled. "Thank you."  
"Why thank me?" she answered. "Only a god could make that happen!"

After saying this, she smiled and left the classroom.

I was walking to the brigade room, when I saw Mori-san in the hall, carrying the last few presents for Yuki and me. When she saw me, she stopped.

"Ah, sir..."

Sir?

"Your new house is ready. I'll be at your service from now on."  
"From now on?"  
"Yes, _the Agency_ has appointed me as your new maid. For me, it's an honor", she said, bowing.  
"Uh... thank you..."  
"Your car will wait for you outside school."  
"Oh, thank you." I answered.

Mori-san bowed to me, and left the hall.

I entered the brigade room, and Yuki was, as usual, reading a book. As soon as she saw me, she closed her book and ran towards me, before giving me a soft, warm hug.

I looked at her, and she was smiling like me. She gave me a kiss.

"See you tonight..." she said.

"See you tonight."

Sigh. I still can't believe this... I'm getting married tonight! I imagined myself with her, on the ceremony, and then I began to wonder how "The Elder" would look like. I felt a bit scared. Obviously, the Elder was a very powerful being. In theory, I shouldn't be afraid of him, but just the idea of being face to face with the highest rank above Yuki made my whole body shiver.

But I shouldn't worry about that. I mean, he's just going to get us married, right?

I shivered even more. I'm getting married!!!!

I said goodbye to my friends when Asahina-san met me.

"Kyon-kun, congratulations!!" she said, hugging me.  
"Thank you".  
"I'm so happy for you! And I'm so glad for being able to watch this with my own eyes again, now that I understand all that you went through."  
"Again?"  
"Eh? Oh... nevermind! Anyway, Kyon-kun, I just wanted to share how happy I am for you! Now, I have to go. I need to help Nagato-san with her stuff. See you tonight!"  
"See you."

I scratched my head. What was that 'again' for? Whatever. If I ask her, she'll probably say 'classified information'. I better go to the car and get ready for the wedding.

When I arrived to the car, Koizumi and Arakawa-san were waiting for me. Arakawa-san opened the door.  
"Oh, thank you." I said, getting in the car. After I closed the door, Arakawa-san got in the driver's seat and started the engine.

"So, Kyon-kun, how are you feeling?" asked Koizumi.  
"Very nervous!"  
"Haruhi is helping Nagato-san get ready for tonight. You're a very fortunate man."  
"Thank you. But you know, I only wanted her to be happy."  
"Yes, and this is why Nagato-san is a very fortunate woman."  
"Koizumi... every time I see her smile, it's a blessing for me. I don't know if I could stand seeing her lose her emotions again."  
"Kyon-kun, you shouldn't think negative thoughts on your wedding day."  
"You're right."

When we arrived home, my sister and my mom already had the luggage with my clothes.

"Mom! Sis!"  
"Kyon! My son, I'm so happy for you! Aren't you excited? Let's go eat."  
Arakawa-san and Koizumi took the luggage and proceeded to put it inside the trunk.

"Kyon-kun", said Koizumi, smiling, "we'll take care of the rest. You just prepare for the wedding."  
"Thanks!" I said, waving.

After I finished eating, I went to my bedroom and began to prepare my clothes. Let's see... the shoes are already polished, there's no dust on the tuxedo, everything's fine... the yukata for tonight....

The doorbell rang, and my mom answered the call.

"Son, it's for you!"  
"I'm coming!"

I arrived at the door when I saw a beautiful teacher smile at me.

"Kyon-kun!"  
"Asahina-sensei! Come in, please!"  
"Thank you! I need to talk to your mother for a while. Meanwhile you can prepare the letters."  
"The letters? Oh, the letters! I nearly had forgotten! But please, come in."

I let Asahina-sensei enter before closing the door. I ran to my bedroom, and very carefully, I proceeded to put the folders in the briefcase that Asahina-sensei had given to me. I had nearly forgotten. I didn't want to think what would happen if those letters got lost in time.

As I was putting the folders on the briefcase, I sighed. I would miss being John Smith. But I'm glad that we'll be having our daily adventures with Haruhi. After all, I'm still a member of the SOS-brigade.

I closed the briefcase, and made sure that no letter had been lost around. Nope, everything's fine.

I hope I didn't take too much to give her the letters. But when I got to the hall, I saw Asahina-sensei being served some tea by my mom.  
"Very delicious, madam", said Asahina-sensei. "Ah, this reminds me of my time at school..."

"Sorry to interrupt", I said politely. "Sensei, here are the letters."  
"Thank you, Kyon-kun! Let me check."

Asahina-sensei took a small electronic device and put it on the table. She put the portfolio on top of it. After two seconds, the device beeped.

"Let's see... Alright, the weight matches to the micrograms. Don't worry, Kyon-kun, everything will go as planned. You don't need to worry about the past now."

I sighed. What a relief.

"Well, I must go now, madam. Oh, please consider my offer."

Offer? What offer?

"Yes, I will" answered my mom. "You're very generous" she said, giving a handshake to Asahina-sensei.

"Sensei... what offer?"

Asahina-sensei winked at me and smiled. "Classified information~!"

**Later, at school...**

Eventually, night came and we were already in the ceremony. It also took place at school before the Tanabata festival.

My parents were present, and so was my sister, who seemed to be excited at everything.

I was very anxious. Finally, the time came. I really hope I don't die of a heart attack. Great, I'm sweating again! Handkerchief, handkerchief... sigh.

"Kyon-kun?"

I turned around, and I saw Kimidori-san dressed as a bridesmaid. "Yes?"  
"Just wanted to notify you. Don't get scared of Asakura-san if you see her. She's harmless now."  
"Asakura-san? She's here?"  
"Hello, Kyon-kun!"

AAAH!!

Asakura-san sighed. "I know. I owe you an apology for trying to kill you a year ago."

Just an apology!? That's an understatement, miss!

"Anyway, I won't try to do anything weird now. But please understand, I was worried about us, and now that we're safe from any threat, you have my deepest gratitude."  
"Are you sure you don't have a knife hidden somewhere?"  
"No, but you can search me if you like", she said winking.  
I stepped back. She chuckled. "Anyway, Kyon-kun... I'm serious. I won't try to harm any of you. After all, I'm under heavy supervision now. And I wouldn't get in the way of the Elder."

I turned to Kimidori-san, and she nodded, smiling. Her smile reassured me of my safety.

I heard a male voice behind me. "Well, I'm ready". It was Koizumi, whom I chose to be my groomsman. Taniguchi had complained that he hadn't been assigned as one, but if I had to include him, I would have to include Kunikida too, and three is just too much. But sincerely, they couldn't compare to Koizumi, who has had to support me by fighting those avatars in closed spaces. I'm sorry, guys, but you just belong to a different scale.

The ceremony begun, and as we were approaching the improvised altar, I could finally see Yuki's boss. His human form was of an elder man who wore glasses, with a huge white beard. When he appeared in his white robes (which looked like a mixture of Catholic priest robe, Buddhist monk robe and a science lab robe - I know, it sounds ridiculous, but that's what it looked like), Yuki and her bridesmaids knelt before him. And in my eyes, he emitted a glowing white aura. His very presence nearly made me faint when I first saw him. After that, I knew in my mind that this... entity... was at least dozens of millions of years old. And still, he "told" me that he was grateful to me and to the SOS brigade for gaining knowledge that had been unknown to him and to all the Integrated Data Sentient Entity for eons. Koizumi and I knelt before him, too.

"Please rise", the Elder said.

Koizumi left me, while Kimidori-san and Asakura-san left Yuki. Now it was just the two of us in front of the Elder.

He began to speak.

"It is an honor for me to preside this ceremony of Sacred Matrimony, whose data will reside in our memories until this instance of the Universe gets deleted, and even beyond."

Just hearing the words 'instance' and 'deleted' made me wonder if the people in school would think Yuki's religion was some kind of UFO cult. Well, technically, it was, but if we want to compare, I wonder what they'll think if they find out that Haruhi is some kind of god.

The Elder spoke. And for some reason, his words (and ours) were heard through the loudspeakers even when he wasn't using a microphone. I wonder how many of the people around noticed this tiny but significant detail.

"Do you, Nagato Yuki, take this man as your husband, until either your lives as mortal beings runs out?"  
"Yes, I do."  
"Do you", he asked me, calling me by my full name, "take this woman as your wife, until either of your lives as mortal beings runs out?"  
"Yes, I do."

Then, the Elder muttered some words at an incredible pace. He put his hands on both of our heads, and something inside me changed. I still can't recall what was changed, but something was changed. But I'm sure of one thing: Yuki belonged to me, and I belonged to her. This knowledge was signed and verified by the Integrated Data Sentient Entity.

The Elder put his hands together, and said with a loud voice:

"By the authority transmitted to me, signed and verified since the beginning of this world, I hereby declare you, husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride."

I lifted Yuki's veil, and we kissed each other. Everyone applauded at us. Camera flashes were sparkling all over the place, and fireworks were launched from the school rooftop.

Wedding music was played, and the ceremony finished. After the Elder entered one of the school buildings, nobody heard of him later.

The people in charge of organizing the wedding moved the chairs and put tables together for the guests - which was the entire school. It took around 20 minutes for them to finish. More than enough time for us to change to our yukatas. Yuki looked just gorgeous.

The dinner had been paid for by the Tsuruya family, so there was no problem at all regarding the school funds. Next to our table, were my family's table, and there was a special table reserved to the SOS brigade - which, by the way, had been officially recognized as a school club. The supervisor was none other than Asahina-sensei herself.

In that table there were seats for Asahina-san, Asahina-sensei, Haruhi, Koizumi, and the newest member of the brigade: The mysterious girl who came from a parallel universe - and who was a personal friend of mine in that other universe.

Just before dinner began, Asahina-san stood up and took the microphone to recite a poem. Like everyone else, she was wearing a yukata.

"Um... hello... everyone... I would like to um... recite a poem for the recently wed couple... um... and... this poem was written by Nagato Yuki herself."

Yuki began to blush, and gently squeezed my hand. Needless to say that she was both excited and embarrassed by the poem being read.

_Eternal Tanabata  
by Nagato Yuki._

_In a night made out of tears  
Orihime called her lover.  
Hikoboshi, please come over;  
it's allowed if it's our dreams._

_This night would, from others, differ,  
how could snow fall in the summer?  
It's the tears shed by the princess  
while she's waiting on her corner._

_The gods made our bridge for this,  
We don't need to fear their gazes  
Altair, I beg, please give me a kiss,  
Vega called through times and places._

_The night Vega and Altair kissed  
Tanabata was discovered.  
Such a night won't be dismissed,  
for our dreams will be recovered._

_In a safe box they're well kept,  
the dreams waiting for the wedding  
the joys shared while they had slept,  
the tears she'd been daily shedding._

_In a night made out of tears  
Hikoboshi met his lover.  
Orihime, cry no longer;  
You're now safe from all your fears._

_Let's all dress in a yukata  
To remember our first meeting.  
Let all nights become our greeting,  
our eternal Tanabata._

The public let out an "aaw" in chorus and applauded. And Haruhi, who was being hugged by Koizumi, couldn't stop crying. Even when she didn't exactly understand what it meant, she was deeply moved. But I understood perfectly the meaning of that poem. Besides the obvious fact that I was Altair (Hikoboshi), and that Yuki was Vega (Orihime), the safe box contained the encrypted memories of our shared dreams - the dreams where we could share the love we felt for each other, completely void from inhibitions.

It never occurred to me that Yuki would make such a beautiful poem about our nights together - much less that she would use Tanabata as a figure for this. This was our secret. Our Tanabata secret. I remembered what Yuki had told me - that it had been precisely on that night of Tanabata, four years ago, that I had met her for the first time. But I wonder, when exactly did she fell in love with me? I guess I'll ask her later.

The group ENOZ began to animate the dinner with their music. Since some of the members of ENOZ were no longer students of North High, they had been hired to play for us. Later I found out that Haruhi had traveled back in time to hire their services, so that they would have enough time to practice their songs for tonight.

As they were playing, I gave Yuki my wedding present for her. It was both a wedding present and a birthday present. She carefully opened it, revealing sphere with a beautiful winter scenery inside.

She looked at it, amazed at the art quality. "It's beautiful... thank you", she said, smiling at me.  
"Oh, but you haven't turned it on yet."  
"Turn it on?" she asked me, puzzled.

I chuckled. I couldn't believe she didn't know about it! Or perhaps she was feigning ignorance?

"Close your eyes."

Yuki closed her eyes while following my instructions.  
"Now, shake it a little, then put it on the table, and open your eyes."

When Yuki opened her eyes and she saw that in the inside of the sphere it was snowing, her eyes began to look all glassy.

"This is... this is..."

How could I forget the poem that she wrote for the Literature club? About how she loved to see snow fall when she first came to Earth. The day after we dated, I purchased that snowy sphere for her, and kept it carefully until this day.

Seeing her eyes get wet with that crystalline liquid, I said, smiling:

"Happy fourth birthday, Nagato Yuki."

She hugged me, with her eyes closed. "Thank you!!! Thank you!!!"

Seeing Yuki's beautiful face, crying in joy, was the best present I could ever receive.

**The wedding night.**

The dinner had finished, and we proceeded to admire the Tanabata fireworks. All of the SOS brigade. Asahina-sensei was sitting next to Asahina-san. Next, the slider girl (whose name will be kept secret until today for security reasons). Next, Haruhi was holding hands with Koizumi, and I was holding hands with Yuki. She had her head resting on my shoulder.

The fireworks finished, and we knew that it was time to go home. Everyone began saying goodnight, and I said goodnight to my family.

Arakawa-san was waiting for us in the black cab. We waved goodbye to everyone.

I began getting anxious. Tonight... our wedding night... in our own home... only Yuki and I.

We were escorted by Arakawa-san to our new home. Mori-san was already waiting for us, and led us to our bedroom. The room had a wide bed, and the lamps emitted a soft light.

"The bathroom has already everything you need. There are robes and towels for each one of you. Good night, masters."  
"Goodnight, Mori-san", we said in chorus.

She closed the door from outside.

The first one to go to the bathroom was me. Hey, now that I think about it, why don't I take a shower?

"Yuki... I'm going to take a shower. It won't take long."  
"Go ahead."

Ah... such a nice bathroom. And what a refreshing shower. It was just perfect for a hot summer night. As I was showering, I began to wonder what would happen if I suddenly heard the curtains open. Would I be bold enough to look around?

But that didn't happen. I took my towel and bath robe and got out. Yuki entered the bathroom.

"My turn", she said, smiling.

As soon as I got on the bed, I began to get both anxious and embarrassed. What should I do? How should I look at Yuki?

I decided to calm down and turn on the TV.

WHAT THE HELL IS HARUHI DOING IN THE TV!?!?

"Ah, Kyon! Welcome to the Haruhi channel! To prepare you for your honeymoon, I have collected the following movies to prepare you for -"

Click.

The TV set got turned on by itself.

"Don't you dare turning me off!" shouted Haruhi. Ugh, this can't be happenning!

"Just kidding!" she said, smiling. "Anyway, Kyon, there are some interesting channels on the TV, with background music and nice panoramic views. Enjoy your night!"

After Haruhi winked, The TV set changed itself to a visually pleasing channel with background music. Ah, that's much better.

Finally, Yuki came out of the bathroom, wearing her robe. She sat down on the bed next to me. Touching my hair, she asked: "Would you like me to dry it for you?"

"Uh..."

Yuki didn't wait for my answer. She moved her hand over my hair, and it was now dry.

"That's better", she said.

She looked at me, and I looked at her. She began to blush, and diverted her gaze to somewhere else. Oh, Yuki, how I love it when you do that!!

"I think it's time", she said.

I swallowed. Yes, it was time... but... I didn't know how to start.

"Let me start then", she said, before kissing me softly, with her eyes closed.

What happened later will be kept only between Yuki and me. I won't say whether I used the tips that Haruhi gave to me. But I can say that the love we felt for each other was orders of magnitude above what we had felt in our dreams.

**The next morning...**

It was a good thing that we didn't go to class that morning. We still had to study later to compensate for the classes that we skipped, but at least that day wouldn't officially count as an absence.

The first thing I noticed when I opened my eyes, was that Yuki was already awake. She had been looking at me with a loving smile that couldn't be expressed with words.

Wearing only the bedsheets above us, she said to me, smiling:

"Good morning... Kyon."  
"Good morning, Yuki."

I took my hand and caressed her shoulder with my fingertip.

We smiled at each other. Words weren't necessary now to communicate. We stayed like that for around a couple of minutes. Finally, I felt the need to stretch my arms.

"How did you sleep?" I asked after yawning.  
"Wonderful. You?"  
"Wonderful too."  
"What would you like for breakfast?"  
"I don't know... fried eggs would be fine."

She gave me a quick kiss, and got up. Until now, I hadn't noticed how beautiful her figure was. She quickly put on her night gown, while I put on my pajamas.

Nagato grabbed the phone, and dialed a quick number.

"Mori-san... good morning. Please prepare the table for breakfast."

Then she proceeded to wash her hands. "Oh, Kyon!"  
"Yes, dear?"  
"Last night, your mother gave me a message for you."  
"What is it?"  
"To call her when you woke up."

Ah,mother... I just hope you don't ask me for the details of the honeymoon!

I proceeded to pick up the phone and began to dial home. Mom's home, I mean.

"Hello?"  
"Kyon! How are you doing?"  
"Fine, mom, thank you."  
"Just wanted to congratulate you for your wedding!"

I could hear my sister shout "Congratulations, Kyon-kun!!"

I chuckled. My mom kept talking.  
"By the way, what religion was that priest? He looked kinda weird."  
"Oh, it's a … rare religion, very ancient, but not well known."  
"Ah, that explains it. How did you sleep? Everything went fine?"  
I chuckled. "Yes, mom, everything went fine."

My sister began to shout. "Mom, I'm going to brush my teeth!"  
"Don't forget to brush inside your cheeks!" my mom shouted.

"Son, your clothes are ready for the moving. Oh, guess what?"  
"What?"  
"Well, last night, while we were getting dressed for the wedding, I noticed something curious. Nothing serious, but I just felt I just had to tell you."  
"What is it, mom?"

I would never forget my mother's words through the telephone.

"Did you know your sister has a star shaped mole on her chest?"

**- THE END -**

* * *

**Author's notes:**

PLEASE KEEP THE REVIEWS SPOILER FREE!

Thank you!


End file.
